i will haunt every version (of you)

Without showering like you typically would to sluice away the horror, you threw on a shirt and called the only friend you’d confided in about this ordeal—Heizou, the detective who obdurately refused your attempts at paying him for his help.

When you heard the knock, you pried open your front door enough to confirm the presence of Heizou and let him slip inside.

“[name]-san, hey—whoa!” Heizou’s genial greeting became smouthered in notes of flummox when you hastily shut the door behind him, allowing him to garner a peek at your current state. “Why aren’t you dressed?”

To be standing in front of a friend with nothing but a shirt that concealed your sex just enough to be shy of exposing was still wholly humiliating that tears stung at the back of your eyes. “You’re a detective, aren’t you? What if I⋯ have evidence on me?”

Folding his arms over his chest in congruence with raising an eyebrow, Heizou shot back reflectively, “Like what? Doesn’t the perpetrator always use a condom?”

“I don’t know! That’s why I’m asking you!” you cried out, quivering where you stood as that maelstrom of dread and incomprehension came surging back within you. As if they ever left, really. “I just thought in case you wanted to check for clues.”

“That’s not good, [name]-san. Even if you’re the client, you have to be more proactive,” Heizou began whilst shaking his head, the sway of his hair enough to cursorily mesmerise you away from your drowning thoughts, “What sort of evidence would the criminal leave behind? Use that pretty brain of yours and think it over before you have someone examine your bare body.”

Surmising you not to be in a condition where your thoughts would be lucid, Heizou exploited the moment when your shoulders slumped to thread his fingers through your hair. “You already feel vulnerable, don’t you?” he whispered sweetly, giving the top of your head a pat before retracting away.

Heizou was perceptive and altruistic as always, wasn’t he? The belief that his compassion towards you was pure clouded your judgement, forcing you to neglect the perverse gleam skulking in his eyes as his gaze swept over your form once more.

As you began to ruminate on his words further, Heizou started to saunter down your hallway. “Wait, where are you going?”

“To the crime scene, of course,” Heizou winked.

As much as you wished not to go back there, you understood it’d be better than standing around helplessly. You were the one who called Heizou over for his assistance, and he’d already done lots for you since this plight began (like cleaning up your bedroom each time, investigating leads, or even dropping his break time to comfort you).

The sight of your room was familiar to both you and Heizou by now—your blanket remissly tossed to the floor as if you’d scrambled out of bed in a panic, the damp patch on your sheets conspicuous.

“One, two, three⋯” Heizou counted each wrapper aloud, exacerbating the discomfiture in the atmosphere. But you weren’t going to be doubting and hiding away right now, you told yourself.  “Four, and five.” Each number was jotted down into Heizou’s signature notebook, all relative observations meticulously categorised. 

“That’s more than it has been. I wonder if there’s a reason for that⋯” You speculated vaguely once he finished, realising how only two or three condoms had been left behind customarily until now. How gross; they’d used you to make themselves cum five times? How could you not wake up once?

“Criminals often get emboldened when they’re continually successful. It could be a sign that he’s getting complacent. Or he’s mocking you, doe-eyes.”

Both notions sent a chill down your spine; so much so that you scarcely perceived the shift in Heizou’s demeanour. Your fingers fretted with the hem of your shirt, tightening into fists around the fabric until you could practically feel the numb sting of your nails puncturing through.

“D-Does he think I’m stupid?”

“Mm. It seems your cluelessness probably just makes him even more excited,” Heizou tittered in response, the noise disparaging—making it feel as if all that bile from before was lurching along your tongue in thick waves.

Heizou often needed to acclimate to the headspace of those he was investigating, that’s why he was able to pinpoint the psyche of your offender; and why he seemed so exulted with himself. Besides, it made sense, right?

“I mean, he’s visited you a few times now, and he’s been able to do what he wants each time,” Heizou relinquished a brooding hum alongside that dissonant smile. “Locking your door and windows clearly hasn’t stopped him. But you knew it wouldn’t, didn’t you?”

Heizou’s tone⋯ why did it feel off?

“So that brings me to a new line of questioning. Why haven’t you asked me to stay over yet?” Heizou’s lips curved even higher at the sight of your visage crumbling, riveted on the exact moment your heart plummeted into your stomach cavity. “Could it be that, deep down, you suspect me?”

You’re afraid to trust Heizou?

If he stayed watching over you, you know he wouldn’t let the perpetrator get away. So why were you wavering in pleading for that to happen? Getting assaulted each time you shut your eyes, didn’t you say you were sickened by it?

Ah, poor little doe-eyes—that’s the sort of countenance Heizou garbed. Overflowing with pity, yet longing to be the one who saves you.

“Are you scared of facing the truth? You shouldn’t be. No matter how cruel or hurtful, you mustn’t look away. That’s why you asked me for help.”

To find the truth. To figure out who and why someone was doing this to you.

But what would you do if it was Heizou all along?

Utilising your discombobulation to his advantage, Heizou padded up to you, your silhouette utterly defenseless despite the pernicious threats in his voice, Heizou’s palms raised up to cradle your cheeks. “I should prove to you that I’m innocent. What would make you believe me, hmm⋯ ah, why don’t you compare them?”

“Compare⋯ what?”

“Our cum.”

Feeling your body tense at the insinuation, the enervation in your knees nearly making you collapse as disquieting thoughts plunged you into a deeper stupor, you took a shaky step back.

“With what little evidence you have,” Heizou started, plucking a full condom off the bed and dangling it between you like a repulsive declaration, “isn’t this the fastest way to solve that issue?”

You didn’t understand why Heizou was proposing such an egregious idea. There must be another way—or perhaps he was indignant at being mistrusted, so this was his way of getting back at you.

Heizou advanced forward, and you innately receded; until you found the back of your legs bumping against your bed, knocking your balance over.

“You don’t need to do anything right now, [name]-san. Just stay right where you are,” Heizou enunciated as he settled his legs astride your hips, pinning you down in place. Unable to move, you watched as he swiftly undid his shorts and pulled out his erection.

Slender and enlivened, already permeating a carnal warmth, Heizou gave his length a few pumps above you; identifying how your eyes never left him. “Have you been listening? I told you⋯ to be more proactive in order to get to the truth,” Heizou murmured, thumb swiping his needy head before guiding your hand to him.

“H-Heizou-kun, I—!” you stammered over your words, finally having found your voice, but it was downright lamentable. With his fingers still twined around your wrist, he maneuvered your soft hand into languid strokes. Up and down, along pulsing veins.

Palpable heat pooled into Heizou’s cheeks the moment you came into contact with his dick, breaths deepening into lascivious groans. “What is it, doe-eyes? First time touching a cock?”

Asking that right now⋯ it didn’t seem like the virtuous detective you’d known. Was Heizou just playing with you now?

“N-No, I just—”

“Aw, so you have before. That makes me sad⋯ after all, you’re barely even helping me. Tell me, how did you touch theirs? Did you go slow, like this?” Heizou mimicked his words, making you grind the heel of your palm with inert sweeps beneath his thrumming dick. “Or maybe you’re the type to go rough and fast?”

The truth was, he’d been playing you all along.

Pumping back and forth with increased fervour, Heizou’s voice gradually dissolved into a string of sultry moans. Rosy hues inundated the contours of his mien as those lips you’d watch denounce criminals a hundred times parted in debauchery. 

It was enthralling to the point of feeling dizzy.

“Hey, [name]-san. Your hand feels so good⋯” Heizou gasped between the sounds of your hand fondling him, each press and brush magnifying the pleasure etching into his very bones. “Being able to feel your skin against mine, I never want to stop.”

Beads of pre-cum dripped from the head of his cock, pooling down as Heizou forced your unwilling fingers to seize it up and smear him in it. More and more, he looked thoroughly besotted; that tangle of ecstasy in his gut bursting over.

“See? I’m leaking so much, and I’m the one doing all the work. But you know,” Heizou crooned breathlessly, forehead coated in sweat as it dropped down to bump against yours. The euphoria was about to overflow. “You’re cutest when you’re pathetic like this♡”

That smouldering titillation bubbling beneath your consternation was bewitching—unlike any other expression he saw you make before.

“Haah, I’m cumming,” Heizou shuddered whilst guiding your hand back enough for the hot ropes of cum to spill directly onto your palm; luxuriating in the way the white streaks enveloped your skin. “Nnh⋯!”

Your wide-eyed, flustered features seemed radiant to Heizou in his afterglow, yet he pushed himself through it and said, “Put your other hand out.”

When you weren’t fast enough to obey, Heizou took it upon himself to snatch your other hand before you could react. He grabbed one of the used condoms and poured the sticky contents out onto your hand.

“Take a go~od look. Are they the same?”

“I-I can’t tell⋯”

Heizou could discern how disorientated you were, and it made another barely suppressed giggle teeter on his lips. “Heh, that’s alright.”

Cupping his hands beneath yours, Heizou interlaced your hands together—forcing two batches of cum to meld together. The scent, the sensation, the feeling⋯ it left you even woozier. Cum from your assailant and Heizou’s drenched your hands, and you were impelled to try and squirm your way out from underneath him.

“Nuh uh, you’re staying,” Heizou practically demanded, that dour tincture in his words scattering newfound restlessness across your body. Yet his smile was back only a beat later. “Wanna taste it?”

That question seemed to be the push you needed as it jolted your nerves once more. With watery lashes, so overwhelmed by the situation, you wailed, “No, why are you doing this, Heizou-kun?!”

“I’m trying to absolve myself of being suspicious in your eyes.”

“It’s not working!”

“That’s fine. Then⋯”

To not be suspicious. To not have your glossy eyes look at him in uncertainty.

A despairing scream tearing through the battlefield subsequently finished with a gory abattoir. Within moments, Lohen had slaughtered the enemies. Everyone stood in terror, both from the loss of a cherished knight and the carnage wrought by their own superior.

Stabbing his spear into the ground without a word vocalised, Lohen reached down to press two fingers against your neck and strained to feel the enervated pulse that lingered beneath the surface. Faint, but existing. Judging by the lacerations to your head, sanguine matting your hair together in a tangled and sticky mess, you suffered egregious damage.

Lohen knew that. And yet⋯ his hands moved before he could think and a surge of frost pooled from his palms cradling you. A coating of ice suspended your current state, that wish of his seizing the vestiges of your life.

“Lohen-sama⋯ let us help carry the body——” “Don’t touch them! You’re speaking as if they’re dead, but they’re not. Not yet!”

Sweeping you into his arms, Lohen didn’t address the subordinates again; even as they desperately called after him, with their jaws tightening and eyes watering in unbridled angst.

After bringing you back to Mondstadt, a multitude of differing opinions inundated Lohen as he took your decaying form to healer after healer. All of them agreed on one thing: you were never going to regain consciousness. Not in a way that mattered.

You only had an iota of genuine life within you, and the one thing that tied you to this world was the nurturing nature of Lohen’s vision freezing you in an endless state of death.

Something fractured in Lohen when he realised he had failed to protect you—like crackles in the emptiness you once occupied. Because, as he embraced you, his living dead, a manic grin curved on his lips.

This feeling—it was supreme joy.

“⋯ You’re finally all mine.”

Encased in a glass coffin, one crafted with icicles and a veneer of rime, your body rested. A darkened, hollow gaze always met Lohen’s as he ambled into the dim room. Your skin was gradually peeling, fissures budding with fresh blood, from even the slightest change in temperature.

“Ah, it looks like your arm is fraying a bit. We’ll have to freeze it again,” Lohen began as he bent down in front of you, guiding your hand into his own to scrutinise the limb. “You don’t mind, do you, my [nickname]?”

Lohen didn’t retain any healing magic of his own. And since you were already ‘gone’, a corpse made of rotting flesh and ice, there was no helping it when your body inexorably fell apart.

A burst of cryo spilled from his fingers, the noise of crinkling reverberating around you both in a sickening chorus. “We’ll have to be more careful from now on. But⋯ don’t worry. I won’t abandon you, even if you lose everything,” Lohen avowed whilst affixing knightly kisses along your knuckles.

Repulsive promises disguised as salvation. That’s all they were.

You were dead; yet chunks of ice occluded you from passing on. All you could do was watch, as if you were an outsider without autonomy.

Lohen’s lips were lukewarm as they dotted kisses up along your arm, until he arrived at your lips. Stiff as they were, he still kissed you and rounded his mouth with yours. He luxuriated in the ecstasy that remained from being connected with you, smirking into the kiss as you melted into him more and more with each press against you—his presence the only thing that breached the cold of his own making.

While Lohen began to tug at the clothes he specifically dressed you in, his tongue laved at your ear; and Archons, the shudder that coursed through him from how frigid you were was so wholly debauched it would make you wonder if he ever felt miserable.

“These shirts are so irritating. If it was up to me, I’d just keep you cute and naked for me all the time,” Lohen crooned with diminutive notes of vexation in his voice, ripping apart the useless fabric that kept him from you before continuing, “but you used to get so mad whenever I suggested it. So I’ll make sure you’re dressed again after we’re done.”

Pretending to follow your preferences, Lohen once again used you as if everything was normal.

Lohen’s fingers pinched at your hardened nipples with crazed exultation, pulses of warmth tingling your nerves—and he only pinched harder when he managed to evoke a hushed mewl from you.

Continuing to abuse your erect peaks, Lohen slipped his other hand between your thighs and simpered upon feeling the evidence of titillation from you. “Even in death, you’re such a lewd [nickname]. Ahaha, you really can’t let me go,” he taunted with a laugh, swirling his digits to further magnify your arousal.

It was entirely the other way around. Lohen was the one who clung onto you, forcing you to endure the eternal torture of being ‘here’—even if you didn’t want to.

With no resistance from your limp self, Lohen was able to effortlessly slide two fingers into your opening. Your insides twitched around him, and Lohen giggled against your ear as he deftly prodded against your sensitive spots. 

“Hehe, you’re adorable⋯ your eyes are blank yet you’re quivering from the pleasure. I wonder if you can even hear me right now,” Lohen mused whilst thrusting his fingers back and forth, drilling into you the way he so vividly remembered you liked. “Haah, you moaned a little just now!”

Disgusting. Fingering you as if you were a cadaver for his gratification⋯ one he would never, ever let go of.

Each time your body responded in bliss, as warped as it was, Lohen was spurred on. Again and again, he would bring you euphoria to bind you to him; to this very moment in the waking world. 

✧ There’s nothing Lohen abhors more than someone confessing to you or dating you. No one is truly good enough in his eyes, or so he says. Each time you’ve tried to get a partner, Lohen inculates that you need to choose better people—unremittingly drilling into your head that they’re not suited for you. Not really. He’ll attempt to obfuscate his malice, yet iota pieces ooze from each word.

And, oh no, you lost the present xx got you? That’s too bad⋯ but it’s okay! Lohen will buy you a new one! (Said present from another person is located in a dumpster 20 miles away, mangled beyond repair.)

✦ Not a single gift you’ve bestowed to him from the first time you met has been thrown away. Yes, even that old box of crayons from fifth grade is tucked safely away inside his bedroom. ✧ Another thing that Lohen detests is when you claim to want space, or you’re far too busy studying for college to hang out with him. You can’t even let him chill on your bed? He’ll be quiet, won’t even know he’s there! If you get too insistent on rejecting him, he’ll just let himself in. 

⋯⋯What? Where’d he get a key to your apartment? Silly, you gave him one when you first moved in, duh! (You didn’t.) ✦ Lohen patterned your passcode ages ago; letting himself into your phone while you’re sleeping or away. He’ll swipe through your apps and messages, confirming his suspicions and delusions. Also he sends himself your nudes, or any type of lewd pictures you’ve taken of yourself, before deleting the evidence of having done so. ✧ When you’re not home at your apartment, Lohen will purloin the opportunity to enter your bedroom and masturbate on your bed. There’s an irresistible pleasure in rutting into a piece of your clothing, knowing that you might walk in on him that he can’t deny⋯ (of course he has your routine memorised, he just likes the thrill of perhaps being caught by you).

✦ There’s just so many instances of him doing something platonic that harbours ulterior motives. 

- Oh, you wanna do a load of laundry? Hold up, he’ll throw it in for you (steals a pair of your panties). - Getting a different drink from you to deliberately sip from your straw after you, tongue swiping quickly around to make sure he’s tasted every last bit of your saliva. - The drink he got for you on your way that’s already opened? Drugged. You’re so hopeless, and now, he’ll have to change your clothes before tucking you into bed because you ‘fell asleep’. 

✧ Lohen will methodically drops hints that he’s stalking you—but you’re so dumb you never take the bait. He’ll casually give you stalking tips, or create a scenario with a fake stalker and act oblivious about it.