the daily elf

I saw a post on a terf blog before I blocked it from someone being like "Ummm is anybody else really concerned about the rise of antisocial kinks like pissing" and it made me laugh so hard I almost did a little antisocial kink myself

I've recently had white women in professional contexts tell me that they were quote "hurt" and "gutted" by what amounted to very minor professional faux pas on my part. I remember reading a white woman academic's essay on Jane Eyre that began with recounting her emotional upset upon having Jane Eyre "taken away from her" by postcolonial / anti-racist scholarship. white women's emotions do have currency in personal and professional spaces in selective contexts, i.e. when wielded against people of colour 🤷🏽‍♀️

In American culture it is considered “bad luck” to leave the stove on when you’re not using it

yes teenage girls can be dramatic and wild but honestly have u ever even seen what happens when u tell a grown man ‘no’

one problem you run into pretty often on here is that the average tumblr user's idea of a good character isn't actually one who's connected to the story as a sort of narrative organ capable of failing forward rather than just failing down or up, but a character who is faithfully communicated in their example-setting successes as a glue man who has invented a glue that allows him to walk up and down anything

6 hour workday maximum i’m not kidding, if it can’t be done in that timeframe it doesn’t need doing.

this doesn't apply to jobs like childcare

If i worked in childcare and my 6 hours were up i would start putting babies in ziploc bags and shipping them to Turkmenistan listed as endangered fruits and vegetables

we had some bills go through that I forgot about and had to pay for the next week of the room so now we are completely broke again !!! we are outta here and onto the curb in seven days please help if you can however you can. thank you!!!!

Hey we heard back from our job prospects & we didn’t actually get them <3 please help us not to die while we frantically search for new work please please please please thank you

i like when i bite people and you can see the ways my teeth are a little crooked in the bite mark because it's like if i had a unique signature sort of like what im supposed to do at the bank and stuff except i actually just scribble the pen up and down and dont have a signature because they dont actually care about that kind of thing being consistent at all and it's all a lie so maybe they should let me bite cheques and stuff so i can pretend i know how to sign my name. actually i dont think ive had to write a cheque in like seven years because i dont have money and i dont go to the bank except to get coins for the laundry machine. its kind of convenient because i didnt have to change my signature when my name started being lena actually. maybe if i become famous someday i can find a new shape to become my signature but also i think id be too self conscious to make an autograph plus what if they use it to go to the bank and say hi im lena you can tell because i dont know how to sign my name and they go oh youre the girl that doesnt know how to do anything ever, yes come right this way to the vault we keep all your stuff in and then they steal my coins for laundry machines. being famous sounds scary actually.

me goreng? what do you mean i fried this.