胸キュン

a place of comfort

when i think of your heartbreaks

out of everyone

4 o'clock of Everything

this is something i made 3 years ago.

it is written during my hardest year, 2014. each piece inside, be it the prose, the poem or the short story; i materialize them from overwhelming emotions i experienced at specific time. some i wrote in one sitting, some took months. [4 oclock of everything] is filled with raw substances i dont remember writing or ones with profound, core memory embodied in the lines.

so when rmv released their version, i was truly overwhelmed..

i saw the lyrics. theres this one prose in my 4oe that depicts exactly this impression: moonlight and how everything is blue; how red sun rises but they meet. how youre crying at dawn but theres me. how 4 oclock is tranquil and altered—detachment but also heightened sense of surrounding.

it was mine.

very primordially so.

so seeing it materialize in a song, written by someone else i absolutely never talked with, with their voices and tunes they mulled over in their heads and punched in personally,

it’s some time and space and soul shit. did some warp happen and my soul from 4 years ago actually made contact with them during the time it was written? it has to be. everything about the song veined everything i was. it feels like i wrote it but its also foreign cz i never did..but my soul was there, somehow. its impossible otherwise.