Neal Caffrey has, canonically
escaped a supermax prison (without using violence)
stolen a precious artwork from under the nose of his FBI handler during a raid, twice
disarmed and gotten into a booby-trapped Nazi submarine full of looted art
robbed the Italian consulate
robbed multiple banks
swapped a real Degas for a fake Degas right under the nose of his FBI handler and then parachuted off a building roof in Manhattan to get away with it
helped steal half a billion dollars from the Federal Reserve
stolen art and gems from dozens of famous museums
forged everything from a dinosaur egg to a map of Vinland
taken down one of the most famous and dangerous gangs of thieves in the world
successfully faked his own death multiple times
It's a good thing he isn't violent and has a heart of gold and immense loyalty to his friends because if he had a single evil bone in him it would be so over for you fuckers



















