MindlesslyMindful

a rejected spirit hoovers around like an unwanted re-flung boomerang not wanting to come to a stand still. This, in most cases is by choice via emotional unreasoning. Put aside hurts, confusion, and/or self pity for a moment. Lives at that instant mirror that of a punctured balloon swirling around aimlessly while whistling for attention - someone, anyone, SEE ME!

wrong lessons in rejection muddle hearts of beautiful souls causing life long uneasiness to their own selves. Unbelief is born & develops in to an ‘ever chewable’ bitterroot: One that seems to gain in bitterness with each passing day. Smiles are turned into frowns. Joy becomes an afterthought. Trust comes with conditions. The possibility of something good is mired by fear of others perceives. Life eventually develops into a burdensome gift.

You owe it to yourself NOT to live in this state.

choose to UNREJECT your worth. No one has the power & tools to do so more than YOU!

I sat my behind down on my plush but semi-comfy couch readying myself to watch a movie I had been procrastinating on for years. My fake red ‘velvety’ blanket on my lap, and a bag of homemade popcorn seasoned with Himalayan salt & some caramel on hand. I couldn’t contain my excitement any longer. ‘The Curious Case of Benjamin Button,’ has been on my “to watch list” for quite sometime now.

Yes, I know. I may be a little under 12 years too late in watching it since its official release in theaters in December 2008. However, I can almost guarantee that in 1922 when author F. Scott Fitzgerald first published a short story with the same title, he wasn’t thinking that a young man almost 100 years later will be finding literal lessons in this weird but powerful story.

Aside from the obvious near impossible body reversal ordeal the main character underwent ever happening in what we know as real life, the implications presented through his life journey ought to (at the very least) challenge us to live our lives ‘Buttonnesquely FULLy.’ How this looks like is unique to each & every one of us but the foundation of it needs to be constant: use fear as a CRUTCH and not as a barrier to living - however cliche as that may seem.

Our lives ought to be filled with daring experiences of highs & lows instead of playing it safe all of the time. We should strive for teachable mistakes type of scenarios as these enable us to be more open for newer ventures as opposed to sitting out. In showcasing experiences of lost love, our lives need to reflect & allow for softened hearts to prevail even as we fight to navigate through hurtful pains. This is living as it forces us to break down hardened emotions which, more times than we’d like to admit, they transform us in to people we can’t stand once in the safety of our own solitary moments. I urge us to fight to fill our lives with more memories created in lessons learned as opposed to lingering on regrets on ‘what if’ type of situations.

At the very least, we each owe this to ourselves because then, what is living if not the chance to be the very best version of ourselves at whatever stage we find ourselves in? This, we should seek to choose 9/10 times as opposed to functioning on survival mode due to fear of not living to other people’s standards. Your joy, your peace of mind and your happiness is warranted. Do not silence that voice.

“For what it’s worth: it’s never too late or, in my case, too early to be whoever you want to be. There’s no time limit, stop whenever you want. You can change or stay the same, there are no rules to this thing. We can make the best or the worst of it. I hope you make the best of it. And I hope you see things that startle you. I hope you feel things you never felt before. I hope you meet people with a different point of view. I hope you live a life you’re proud of. If you find that you’re not, I hope you have the courage to start all over again.”

― Eric Roth, The Curious Case of Benjamin Button Screenplay

(PS: If we are alike, you then know that failure to adhere to this principle is imminent more times than we hope for. However, the action of trying should ALWAYS encourage us all to be persistent even in hurtful situations such as lost jobs, failed relationships, broken promises etc.)

A hamster on a wheel delights in its experience unquestionably. With each movement, it convinces itself of an attainable goal without quite understanding how vain its actions are. As humans, this almost resembles our everyday moments even more so during our most desperate times.

Our minds run wildly convincing ourselves that moving is progress. Yes! to some extent, that statement is factual. However, this constant motion of ideas, or conceptions or just mind rumblings in most cases often cripples our innocence. Like a train, we chug along in our day to day lives hauling heavy loads of thought and running on fumes while still holding on to hope that reaching our goals will miraculously heal us from our burdened journeys. Eventually, we end up losing our identities in order to justify a societal view of what growth ought to look like at certain stages of life.

Yes! we are all allowed growth. Yes! we are all allowed movement. However, our journeys ought to produce lessons that far exceed developing resiliency towards life’s tough moments. In my experience, such actions often lead to hardened and skeptical hearts which then lead to hardened and skeptical lives. Instead, I would encourage us to strive towards attainable goals that breathe LIFE in us. Those that force us to be true to ourselves and LIVE LIFE in the present as opposed to ‘hamstering' our way through it unquestionably in pursuit of an imaginary, miraculous, life giving goal.

Go and LIVE. Don’t just function!

Vulnerability in the open is something we all struggle with from time to time. Rare and life giving are the few humans who go through life with reckless abandonment seeking to explore and LIVE fully regardless of inevitable mistakes. I must admit, these are the envied breed.

We should be actively aware that no one willfully seeks out a dull unexciting day. Unfortunately, as we grow and develop as humans, our everyday experiences callous our hearts and minds and train us to be highly apprehensive instead of hopeful; more reserved instead of outgoing; exceedingly judgmental instead of gracious. This mode of thinking and living, we must intentionally choose to reverse for the sake of our peace of mind. Your everyday joy should never be substituted for despair.

A child’s disposition ought to teach us something. ‘Aimfully’ wonder by living life with the belief of possibilities even in the unknown moments.

Fight for your joys!