Richie: Okay, look. I may be ugly, and I may be stupid, but did you know there are 50 horny and single MILFs in my area that want to fuck ME. And all I have to do, is give them my mom's credit card number.
The Losers: ... *face palm*
h
we're not kids anymore.

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@foxolate
Richie: Okay, look. I may be ugly, and I may be stupid, but did you know there are 50 horny and single MILFs in my area that want to fuck ME. And all I have to do, is give them my mom's credit card number.
The Losers: ... *face palm*

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Me: *Casually scrolling through Tumblr feed*
Tumblr: Reddie
Tumblr: Reddie
Tumblr: More Reddie
Tumblr: A picture of a cat riding a tricycle on a picnic table with a half-watermelon on it's head.
Tumbler: BACK TO REDDIE!
Have you heard of lilo and Stitch the animated series?
Yes I have actually! Stitch is my number one favorite Disney character, and I am a huge fan of Lilo and Stitch so it didn't take me too long to find out. When I did though, I exploded through the roof in excitement. đ I've only been able to watch like two episodes though since I can't really find it on anything.
When You Don't Give Eddie Attention
Okay, so imagine you're in a relationship with Eddie Kaspbrak and you're just trying to do your homework, but Eddie wants your attention so freaking bad he starts acting absolutely ridiculous like I can barley even type rn because of how hard I'm laughing.
Eddie: *pretending to have an asthma attack*
Eddie: *throws himself onto the floor*
Y/n: *Sets down pencil* ..Eddie, what the fuck are you doing??
Eddie: I'M STAYING HERE UNTIL YOU GIVE ME THE ATTENTION I DESERVE.
Y/n: ...
Eddie: Y/n if you dON't talk to mE I am going to crUSH my inhaler and then induce an aStHMa attacK and then I WON'T have an inHaLEr and then I'll DIE. HOW ABOUT THAT, HUH?!!!
Y/n: Why am I even dating you-

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IT characters as random things I say
Bill:Â âGet off me before I call the cops.â
Richie:Â âHey guys Iâm gay. Haha just kidding... Or am I?â
Beverly:Â âYou seriously suck.â
Ben: *Shows picture of Boy Band*Â âThose are my husbands.â
Stan:Â âAre you SaTAn?â
Eddie:Â âYâall are disgusting. Bye.â
Mike:Â âAnimals are superior. Facts.â
Pennywise:Â âI WILL EAT YOUR FACE OFF!!!â
Henry:Â âAaaand thereâs another dead body in the floor-â
Together (Uma X Mal)
Request:Â I just saw your post and I wanted to ask you if you could write some Umal fluff? Thereâs barely anything of them on tumblr :cÂ
~anon
Yes, I sure can my friend! I definitely enjoyed writing this because I havenât written any Descendants fics in a while, and the 3rd movie was amaaazzinngg! I honestly didnât even know Umal was a ship until I got this request. Guess I learned something new today. ¯\_(ă)_/ÂŻ Itâs pretty short, but I honestly tried my best. Anyways, I hope you all enjoy! <3
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  Uma laid back onto the couch letting out a quiet sigh. It had been a few days since the barrier around the Isle had been brought down and all the VKâs came into Auradon. It had all been a bit chaotic at first with a bunch of new students at Auradon Prep and their parents lurking around acting kind of shady and suspicious. But nothing bad had happened yet, and that was fine with her. Hopefully nothing bad would end up happening, but sadly thatâs not usually the case when it comes to villains.
    Uma and Mal had bonded quite a bit ever since she left the Isle, and the pirate had started paying frequent visits to Malâs shared dorm with her best friend, much to Evieâs dismay. She hated how Uma would randomly burst in without an invitation and just act like she owned the place. Mal on the other hand, didnât really seem to be bothered at all, which just further fueled the girlâs annoyance.
 Today was another one of those days where after school, Uma just wanted to pay her friend a visit. So she did. And surprisingly enough, when she got there Evie was nowhere to be seen. Mal had explained to her that she had gone out with some friends and wouldnât be back for a while.Â
      And now, here she was with the pretty purple-haired girl, waiting for her to turn on a movie as she laid back on the couch examining her. âThere.â Mal said happily, as she finally found the movie she was looking for. She quickly turned it on before heading back to the couch and sitting down next to her friend. âSo,â Uma really wasnât interested in whatever it was that they were about to watch, so she decided to talk instead. She gently rested her arm behind Mal as she continued. âWhat exactly is this about?â Without hesitation Mal leaned into Uma, resting her head on her shoulder before speaking âWell-âÂ
    Mal then began explaining every single, little detail about the movie to the girl next to her, but Uma wasnât paying attention to what she was saying at all. Instead, she was just looking at her as she talked. She loved seeing the way Malâs eyes seemed to sparkle when she would start talking about something she was passionate about,
  It didnât take long for Mal to realize that Uma wasnât paying attention to anything she was saying. âDid you hear what I just said?â She laughed a bit, as Uma smiled at her calmly. âTo be honest, no, not really. I just got distracted.â She mumbled quietly, as Mal cuddled closer to her. Uma was enjoying every moment of it.
  âDistracted by what?â Mal questioned the other girl, not thinking much of it. Uma gently ran her fingers through the girlâs long purple hair as she quietly continued watching the movie, perfectly content with her actions.
   âYou.â Was her only response. She glanced down at Mal to see a small smile forming on her face. Uma let out a blissful sigh before finally turning her attention to the TV.
 The two of them spent the rest of the night cuddling, talking, and âwatchingâ movies until they passed out on the couch together, and slept until the next morning.
Richie: So basically, what I was thinking of is um-
Bill: *Sucker punches him in the face*
Richie: AhH FUCK- I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU'VE DONE THIS.
Richie: *Breathes*
The Losers:Â âSHUT UP riCHiEâ
I swear to god Jack is the softest human being in the universe- I want one. plEASE.

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THIS IS ONE OF THE MOST BEAUTIFUL THINGS I HAVE EVER SEEN?? LIKE HOW DOES SOMEONE DO THIS?!
Artist credit:Â https://www.reddit.com/user/Bella_Anima/
Stan: Do you ever want to talk about your emotions, Mike?
Mike: No.
Bill: I do-
Stan: I know, Bill.
Bill: Iâm s-sad..
Stan: I know, Bill.
Human: Peter? are you hiding something?
Tom Holland: MeeEEEEeE?!! PlLEeEaaASeeE!!! >:0
Stan when Richie asks him if the weird lady he saw was hot:
Richie: Alright, letâs tell each other a secret about ourselves.
Bill: ...
Richie: Iâm gonna go first.
Richie: I hate you.

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Not Jealous (Bill Denbrough X Reader)
A/n: This is just an extremely short story that I had the urge to write all of a sudden. Iâm not an expert on writing and Iâm really not that good, so I apologize for any mistakes I make beforehand. <3 Y/n = Your name Y/h/c = Your hair color. I hope you enjoy! If anyone has any questions or story requests feel free to ask me about them! I love hearing other peopleâs ideas.
  It was a cloudy yet warm day in the small town of Derry Maine. All was quiet and peaceful, with a few birds chirping happily in the distance. it wouldâve been the perfect day if it werenât for the intent arguing that could be heard coming from a nearby street. There was a medium-sized group of kids slowly riding their bikes through the neighborhood as two of them continued to yell at each other in frustration.
  âIâm telling you Richie,â The young girl with pretty y/h/c hair muttered to the boy beside her. âWe defeated It, okay? But even if It isnât dead, it wonât be coming back anytime soon.â Richie scoffed as they all turned down another street. They had just faced the terrifying clown a few days ago, driving it down into the dark depths of the sewers after an epic battle. It had been a traumatizing experience for them after almost getting eaten multiple times.
   âHow can you be so sure y/n? Do you live with it or something?â Stan rolled his eyes in annoyance as the two continued their petty bickering. They were all heading to Billâs house to hang out since the quarry currently didnât seem like the best option.Â
    âWhat do you think, dumbass?â Y/n growled in response to her ignorant friend. The two glared at each other for a few seconds before Richie opened his mouth again. âR-Richie, stop it.â Bill cut him off before he could even say anything.
  The boyâs eyes widened in disbelief. âOh, so youâre telling me to stop?â Eddie, who was behind them along with Bill, let out a quiet sigh knowing exactly what was coming. âWhat about y/n? I mean, sheâs the one who started this!â âI did NOT!â The girl yelled back at him. God, he was so annoying. All of the losers came to a sudden stop as they finally reached Billâs house. Y/n dropped her bike in the grass right beside Billâs as Richie continued to rant. âSeriously, the only reason you told me to stop and not her is because you like her!â Y/n slammed the door shut after everyone was inside, she hadnât heard the last part of what Richie had said but she didnât care, she was mad at him. A light blush spread across Billâs face at the accusation, but he remained silent. Richie took this as an invitation to keep on talking.Â
     âYeah, I bet youâre just jealous âcuz I get to talk to her way more than you do.â Beverly sighed and quietly led the other Losers who werenât caught in the argument upstairs, so they could actually talk.
 Y/n crossed her arms and cast another glare in Richieâs direction. That was absurd, Richie was just saying the first things that came to his mind as usual. âIâm n-not j-j-jealous..â Bill stuttered. When in fact, he actually was jealous. Sure, Richie and y/n fought a lot, but they spent a lot of time together, and they got along great when they werenât at each otherâs throats. Bill had been crushing on y/n for a long time, but he thought he was pretty discreet about it and he just naturally assumed nobody knew.
   âWhatever,â It seemed like Richie was finally giving up on the argument, much to y/nâs delight. âBut Iâm leaving on this note,â He turned to face y/n and spoke in a loud yet clear tone. âHE LIKES YOU.â and with that, he turned and ran up the stairs heading into the room where the other Losers were.
    An awkward silence fell over the room, as Bill stood there staring at the ground like it was the most interesting thing in the world. A few more seconds passed, and yet he still hadnât moved or said anything at all. Y/n quickly realized she would have to be the one to clear this up. So with that thought in her mind, she took a few steps towards Bill and gently took his hand in hers. âBill?â She spoke his name quietly, knowing how embarrassed he must be after what Richie said. The boy slowly lifted his head meeting y/nâs gaze. He was still blushing, but y/n didnât know if it was because of Richieâs words, or her holding his hand. âDo you like me?â She spoke quietly not letting go of his hand.
    Bill knew there was no way he could deny it now. It took him a few seconds, but he worked up the courage to reply clearly without stuttering. âYes.â He replied, never once breaking eye contact with the beautiful girl before him.
   Y/n couldnât help but smile at his words, he really did like her. Seeing her smile made Bill smile too, he loved seeing her happy. âI like you too, Billy.â She whispered softly to him, causing them both to blush lightly. Billâs heart fluttered at her words, he had never expected to hear her say that. The two of them were caught up in the moment, and the boy leaned towards y/n who slowly leaned forward a bit as well. Y/n placed her hand on Billâs cheek as their lips met in a sweet and gentle kiss.