Β Β Β inspired by the 2016 indie game CRUSH CRUSH developed by Sad Panda Studios
β Leave me to my ice cream and identity crisis. β
β Do you wanna... I don't know... Do a... Date? Like... Go outside, and stuff? β
β Your name muse be WiFi because I swear I'm feeling a connection. β
β Still hanging around, eh? Glad to see you! β
β You're not nearly as big a jerk as I thought. You're about half as bad. β
β Oh! I didn't mean to make you feel bad. I'm sorry. β
β Did you know there have been stories of cats that survived falls up to 32 stories onto concrete? β
β Cats have run for municipal elections at least twice in North America, and have won once. β
β Do you wanna share a tuna sandwich? β
β Looks like it's back to flipping burgers for me. β
β I'm not gonna lie, I'm pretty miffed. β
β On a scale from 1 to 10? I'm zebra. β
β In all fairness that was one helluva shot! β
β If you were 20% cooler? You'd be icy. β
β What's cooking, good looking? Whatever it is, it must be spicy, 'cause you're serving it up HOT. β
β I guess I'll have to find something else to do today... β
β You have inflicted real tragedy on me; my heart is broken. How can I ever thank you? β
β You seem like a good sort. β
β You fill my heart with shadows and sadness, please never leave. β
β I look forward to being miserable with you. β
β I brought you this knife. β
β I haven't decided if you're intentionally depressing or accidentally cute. The contradiction is... flirty. β
β My favorite plant? A venus fly trap of course. Alluring, obvious, and unabashedly deadly. β
β I'm strongly considering giving you my heart; the only question is do I wrap it in paper? Or plastic? β
β Would you shut your pie hole?! β
β You've got a date with 8d6 fire damage! β
β You must be proud to be slain by someone so beautiful. β
β I shouldn't have tried to fight you on an empty stomach. β
β You win some, you lose some. Not me though! I win, or I get bored. β
β You must be part vampire, because you look like a sucker to me. β
β Hey bozo! Why don't you take a closer look? β
β Yeah, you better be sorry Wise Guy. Say it again, it's music to my ears. β
β Not as sorry as you're gonna be when I get outta this cast. β
β You sure talk a big game, but can you walk the walk? β
β Why do they call them fingers? I've never seen them... fing. β
β Oh. What a strange gift... thank you? β
β Who dares disturb my slumber?! β
β Beautiful people never know whom they can trust. β
β Let us converse on matters of importance: such as politics, philosophy, or the excessive bio-matter of celebrities. β
β Thank you. I will cherish it until the heat death of the universe. β
β Is it your objective to endear yourself to me? β
β Don't concern yourself too much. I'm just analyzing your methodology. β
β You will discover muscles you've never used. I will not lie. They will not enjoy our training. β
β Come. Run with me, let us chase the wind together. β
β Eek! Stop stop stop! I am so ticklish! You cad! β
β That got rather personal for a moment there. β
β Were you up all night playing games again? β
β Welcome to the party! Turn up the music, crowd in, show me your moves! β
β I love it! You are so nice to me, and so very mean to your wallet. β
β You and me? We are poetry in motion. A great couplet on a beautiful sonnet. β
β Haha! Sorry, I get carried away sometimes. Thanks for hanging out with me! β