Roseswillalwaysbloom

Coworker: Oh, please, be my guest

Me: My name's not Belle

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Coworker: Your handwriting is like an old Mans

Me: Call me Grandpa

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Coworker: We're like an old married couple

Me: I'm divorcing you

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Me: You should've read my mind

Coworker: If only I had a timemachine

Me: I'd use it to kick you

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Me: I'm sweaty

Coworker: Sweating like a horndog in church

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Me: It be broke

Coworker: we're broke

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Coworker: You need to start eating more veggies

Me: You sound like my dad now

Coworker: Am I your daddy?

Me: I'll smack you with a wet tortilla

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Coworker: Beans!

Me: Beans?

Coworker: Beans!

Me: Beans!

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Me: Abbs means no armpits, boobs or Butts

Coworker: What if I show some tasteful sideboob?

Me: There's nothing tasteful about you

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Me: Chocolate is gonna become only for the rich

Coworker: Eat the rich

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Me: dada dada dada dada Elmo's world

Bucky: I know, like you and me I get, but them? I don’t get it.

[Y/n] as they walks past: We are all fucked up just enough that we are acceptable in society, but left on our own, are capable of murder.

Steve: ….

Bucky: ….

Clint: I’d be a pizza cause im so cheesy!

Steve: I’d be a donut cause im empty inside

*Tony reaches out to pat his shoulder*

Winter Solider: A knife!

[Y/n]: You know he’s gay?

Another Supernatural Fic! YAY! Please leave me feedback and comments. Enjoy!

Word Count~1600

Warnings: Swear words

Pairings: Platonic!Dean/Sam X Platonic!Reader, mentions of Rowena and Cas

Summary: What happens when a witch’s spell is cast on the reader? Craziness ensues! Fluff!

Masterlist

“Sam!” My shout alerted the youngest Winchester as he managed to duck in time to avoid the witch’s blast. I ran past him towards the witch, knife in hand. “Die Bitch!”

The witch laughed and waved her hand in my direction, flinging me up against a wall of the house.

“Where’s Dean!?” I struggled against the witch’s hold as she started chanting. Sam watched on in horror, struggling to get up and gank the witch.

Before he could get to her, the other Winchester burst through the kitchen door, “Hey Wicked Bitch!” You collapsed to the ground as the bullet killed the witch. Swift shot to the head.

I stood up but felt a little woozy. Sam came running up to me. “Hey, you okay [Y/n]? She was saying some spell before Dean got her. Do you feel anything different?”

*I do not own Supernatural*GIF not mine*

Just a short drabble I forgot I had written a while ago. ANGST!

Dean X Reader

Word Count: 368

Warnings: Death

Masterlist

Time had so little meaning. Now that I had none left.

Dimly I heard Dean scream my name. The anguish I heard twisted my heart.

There was a bright flash of white light and the thud of a body hitting the floor.

“Hey, hey [Y/n]. You gotta stay with me, kay?”

I could see Dean’s beautiful face leaning over me, and see his fingers as they carefully brushed against my cheek, but I couldn’t feel his hand. I couldn’t feel anything. I was numb.

“D-D-Dee..”

“Shhh, Don’t try to speak.” I saw his worried green eyes harden as he swung his head up to his brother, “Sam! She’s losing too much blood! That Angel bastard got her.”

I  turned my head to see the younger Winchester running to me with a first aid kit in his hand.

“Dean.” I managed to get the word out in one try, catching his attention with my hoarse and wet voice.

He looked down at where I lay on the ground, head cradled in his lap. My strong Dean. I could see the unshed tears he held. I raised my hand up to cradle his cheek which he leaned into.

“It’s okay.” He stared down at me, the tears now rolling down his face. I gave him a small smile. “Don’t do anything stupid for me.” I coughed, hearing the wetness in my throat, I knew it was blood filling my lungs. I spoke faster, my voice fading, “Protect Sam. Keep…Keep saving people.”

Dean was now panicked, he held my hand to his cheek as I lost the strength to keep it there. “I can save you! I just need more time! Dammit! Where’s Cas?”

“I don’t know, Dean. He’s not here right now and we need to get to her a hospital now!”

Sound slowly started to fade along with my vision. I felt my hand slip out of Dean’s grasp, hitting the ground.

“[Y/n]?[Y/n]!”

But I was no longer there to hear his cries.

Requested: Anonymous

Word Count: 1917

Pairings: None. Sibling!Twin!Reader X Peter Parker

Warnings: MAJOR SPOILERS FOR INFINITY WAR! Mentions of blood, death, major character death, angst!

Request: If you take requests, could you do something peter parker x twin!reader again? It takes place in infinity war, where instead of Peter dying, reader dusts away in his arms? And he like kneels on the ground with reader in a bridal sort of position? Really specific I know. And they share a few words along the lines of “I love you”? I’m sorry I just really like angst aha

a/n: …You asked for angst…I gave you angst…(Evil laughter) Mwuahahaha! Enjoy ;)

When Peter had dragged you along for the field trip to MoMa, this was not what you were expecting.

Tony Stark was currently arguing with who you assumed to be…some sort of Wizard? Either that or a very cranky cosplayer.

Tuning back into the conversation, “-a flying doughnut billions of miles away, with no backup.”

Peter raised a hand, “I’m backup.” You nodded beside him. It might not have been your plan to go to space, but now that you were here…

Tony turned, face red with anger and distress, “No! You’re a stowaway along with your sibling.”

Requested: Anonymous

WHOOO! I love me some Angst and madness and psychotic messes. Hope you guys enjoy this!

Pairing: Natasha X Clint, Platonic!Reader X Avengers, Reader is a twin and adopted child of Natasha X Clint

Word Count:4162

Warnings: Angst. Abuse. Swear words. cruelty. Just a mess of badness.

Request: Can I get a fic where Natasha and Clint have twin daughters. The main character is the youngest. Clintasha and The avengers show more attention to the oldest their whole lives. The younger just gets angrier and angrier over 18 years and finally snaps by taking over hydra. Then the avengers(including maximoffs) find out who the leader is. Maybe a flashback to show just how bad the youngest childhood was.The oldest tried to kill the youngest as kids too. Like Loki and Thor but worse.

Italics are flashbacks/memories

Masterlist

Somewhere in the dark corners of your mind, you wished it hadn’t come to this. The part of your mind that still held onto it’s humanity was screaming out your parent’s names as they fought your soldiers. Screaming out your siblings name as they fought side by side with the people you once considered family.

“I’m so happy for you guys! They are just adorable!”

Natasha laughed, as she held the sleeping child in her arms, “Thor, inside voice, they’re ears are very fragile this young.”

Thor appeared chastised as he went to whisper yell, “I did not know you could conceive a child so quick. Clint must have some superior swimmers.”

Clint blushed as everyone burst out laughing. Tony patted Thor’s arm, “That’s not how that works point break, Clint and Natasha adopted these two.”

Thor appeared to think it over before grinning, “Aww as my father did with Loki. You saved them from a worse fate.”

Natasha smiled at her husband, Clint, and the other child he held, before looking back down at the child in her arms, “That we did Thor. That we did.”

Everyone was crowded around Natasha as Clint put the child he held into a crib, Natasha held onto hers.

Tony spoke up, “What are there names?” Clint smiled looking down at the sleeping baby boy in Nat’s arms.

“His name is Barry, after my brother.” Clint whispered. Everyone awwed. No one asked about the other baby, who was startled awake in their crib. Alone.

Requested: @sassychrissy96

Word Count:1371

Pairing: Natasha X Reader

Warnings: None

Request: Hey, :) I really enjoyed your marvel stories, my fave is Nats Winnie, I was wondering if there is any chance of a follow up, where they arrive back to the avengers? I’ve thought a lot about all the different reactions the team and Fury would have, having all the animals at the tower and would love to see your interpretation. Personally I see it humorous and fluffy. If not, all good. Happy writing :)

Masterlist

a/n: This can be read as a stand alone, or as a sequel to ‘Winnie’

You giggled quietly as you watched Natasha herd your flock of ducklings into the elevator of the Avengers Tower.

You coaxed Winnie and Flicka into the elevator with some Honey and carrots. Once your ragtag family of animals were in the elevator, Natasha hit the button for the common room.

Flicka reared in surprise, and you hurried to calm her down. “Woah! Hey. It’s okay. Momma’s here. It’s okay.” She nickered softly and lipped some of your hair, her eyes calming down as you stared into them.

Turning, you saw a soft look on Natasha’s face. Watching the interaction. When she realized you were watching her, she schooled her expression and looked forward towards the doors.

You couldn’t stand the silence, used to the sounds of the forest and your family, “So. Did you tell your team about…all of them?” You gestured to the menagerie of animals around the two of you.

Natasha snorted, “No. I didn’t. I’m actually looking forward to their reactions.”

Requested: Anonymous

I’m one of your top three favs!? AHHH! That makes my heart happy. 

Pairing: Platonic!Natasha X Platonic!Reader, featuring Platonic!Avengers

Word Count:3578

Warnings; mentions and themes of death, panic/anxiety attack themes and description, swearing

Request: I really love your blog, you are in my top three favourite fanfic writers. I would like to request a Platonic!Reader x Natasha where the reader can see into the timeline and make changes to it and the reader changes something in Nat’s past that causes even bigger problems and now Natasha somewhat hates her for it. So it takes the both of them to correct this mistake.

Masterlist

Sometimes seeing the past and future takes its toll on you. Your everyday life consisted of trying to see the present among visions and memories of past and future timelines. The past were easier, because they were already done, but the future was headache inducing, always changing based on people’s decisions.

It also didn’t help that you didn’t just see your future and past, you saw all the pasts and future timelines that could ever happen to anyone. It was a wonder that you didn’t stay medicated to the point of being a vegetable.

But thanks to years of self training and perseverance, you learned to live with your gift. Eventually you got on the Avengers radar and Steve AKA Captain America himself appeared at your college and asked you to join them. Of course, you had seen this timeline and you said yes.

All you ever wanted to do was help people and with your gift it was possible, but being an Avenger made it so that people actually trusted you and would listen.

Requested: Anonymous

I had a hard time trying to end this…The ending is kind of crappy and I apologize. I changed the request around a little bit but tried to stay as true as possible to the original request. 

Pairing: Natasha X Reader

Word Count: 2331 

Warnings: Mentions of torture, Steve is a dick Request: P. 1 May I request Natasha x fem reader. R is a high level agent only known by Fury, Maria and Nat.  Natasha and R are actually married but again no one knows for safety measures. R only gets called in for dangerous solo missions and emergencies.P. 2 One day a mission with the Avengers goes wrong because of a bad call and stubborn Captain, Nat is captured and severely injured. Fury knowing he is running out of options, has no choice but to call in R, much to the confusion of the others.P. 3 She comes in, worried, pissed and is out for blood for the idiot who got her wife caught but first she has to save Nat. She finds the place where Nat is and after a heated exchange of words with the captain, she decides to go in alone, with only Maria as the pilot and Clint as back-up since she doesn’t trust the others.P. 4 After the bloody rescue mission, Nat is safe, awake and stable, Fury begins to explain why he called in R and who R is, with Nat and R only cutting in to further explain. Kind of Angst and fluff when Nat is safe. It’s a really long request.

Masterlist

Running down the hallway, Natasha fired her guns at the Hydra agents that started swarming from the connecting corridors. “Cap, I’m surrounded. We need to get out!” She shouted in her comms to Steve, the other person on the mission with her.

“No! We need that information! If we leave now, they will destroy it. Get your ass in that room Romanoff!” She could hear the sounds of his fighting as he destroyed the outside posts and guards of the base.

Nat swore at the tone of the Captain, but knew he was right. They already came all this way, leaving without the information would just be another setback in the ongoing battle with Hydra.

Spinning, she flung herself in the air, kicking the agents closest to her before dropping to the ground. Rolling, she slid and fired until her gun clicked, signaling it was empty. Groaning she relied on her fists and feet to take down the next couple agents before spotting the door leading to the intel room.

Running, she made it to the room and slammed the door shut on the remaining officers. “Cap, I’m in the room at the computer, I’m sending you the files.” Natasha bit her lip as she sent the files they were after over onto Shields protective server belt tied to the Quinjet.

“Good! Now get out of there!”

Natasha turned around at the sudden sound of the door being blasted open. Standing in the doorway were several men in all black. Natasha grinned, “Ready to play boys?”

Requested: Anonymous

For the longest time, I couldn’t figure out where I wanted this to go, and then inspiration just seemed to hit me out of nowhere! I hope you like it!

Pairing: Bucky X Natasha, Parents!BuckyNat X Kid!Reader

Word Count:4724

Warnings: Swearing, Child abuse, Death, Blood, Psychopathic tendencies, angst!

Request: A fic where Natasha and Bucky have a daughter. They are never home so she was raised by maids. Then Buckynat and the avengers need somewhere to lay low off the map. The daughter inherited the personalities of the winter soldier and Black widow. So she is very cold.She is a bad girl and very uncaring. She hasn’t seen her parents since she was 9. Very angsty and the avengers including Captain America are in shock of the kids existence.

A/n: I split this so it goes between second person and third person writing

Masterlist

Bucky glanced up from his book when he heard the frantic footsteps pounding down the hallway of the tower. Setting it aside, he saw Natasha running in.

“Nat? What’s going on?” Bucky stood up, immediately on guard for a threat.

Natasha shook her head, grabbing Bucky’s arm, “Steve said to meet him on the quinjet, something about a setup.”

Bucky growled, grabbing Natasha’s arm and running with her to the loading bay.

Aboard the quinjet, Bucky cornered Steve, “What’s going on Steve? Why is everyone here?”

He glanced back at the Avengers. Everyone was aboard the quinjet, Tony, Bruce, Vision, Wanda, Sam, Clint, Rhodey… everyone.

Steve ran a hand down his face, looking haggard, “Someone set us up. It looks like the Avengers were responsible for the bombings in Israel and New York.”

Natasha walked up and placed a hand on Bucky’s shoulder, “Why would someone do that?”

Steve laughed, without humor, “Why wouldn’t they? We’re the Avengers, having enemies is just part of the job. Anyways, we need a place to lay low until the heat passes over. I need ideas. Anyone?”

Silence. No one moved. Steve looked over at Clint, a plea in his eyes.

Clint raised his hands, “Oh no. I already let you guys invade Laura’s space once. That was enough anxiety to last a lifetime. I don’t want her in the hotspot again.”

Steve struggled with getting his nerves under control as he groaned and curled his fists up by his side.

Bucky watched his friend struggle and glanced over at Nat, raising a brow.

Natasha glared, shaking her head back at him.

Bucky tilted his chin towards Steve, eyes wide.

Natasha’s glare dimmed, but she still wore a frown as she shrugged.

“What sort of Jedi mind tricks are you two up to?”

Bucky and Natasha jumped as Tony appeared behind them.

Bucky growled, “Stark.”

Tony smirked, “Barnes. So, care to share with the class what you and your russian lover were debating?”

Natasha turned her glare onto Tony, “Just because we have hooked up before does not give you the right to call us lovers. We are amicable but for now, we are just friends.”

Tony raised his hands, “Okay. Alright, but you still haven’t answered.”

Steve stepped up, “Please, Bucky…Nat…If you know somewhere it would be a big help.”

Bucky sighed, “Alright, I’ll input the coordinates. But you guys…You’re about to learn a bunch of stuff that should’ve been kept in the dark.”

And with that ominous statement, he and Natasha walked up to the console and began flying the quinjet.

[Y/n]: You know he's gay?

Natasha: You sleep with a teddy bear...