POV: You were the kind of girl who hated men. Not because you wanted attention, not because you thought it made you “different,” but because every memory you had of love was painfully loud.
You hated how people looked at you like you were strange just because you avoided boys. You barely spoke to them, you don't have much friends, you never entertained men, never smiled at their flirting. To everyone else, you were cold, distant, and difficult to approach. A weirdo. But they didn’t know anything.
They didn’t know how, as a child, you would hide behind your bedroom door while your father screamed at your mother downstairs. They didn’t know how your tiny hands would tremble every time glass shattered against the floor. Or how your mother’s silent tears became something normal inside that mansion.
You grew up watching your father hurt the woman he promised to love. And worse, you watched him cheat over and over again without shame. Ever since then, you promised yourself one thing: you would never let a man close enough to destroy you. So you built walls around yourself, a walls that was too hard to turn down. Something thick, impossible walls. You buried yourself in academics, talents, and silence. You became smart, independent, untouchable.
While other girls chased after love and devoted themselves to boys, you stayed far away from all of it. Love disgusted you, or at least… that’s what you thought.
You hate men more than anything.
You're afraid to let anyone enter to your doors.
One afternoon, while walking through the crowded hallway of your university building, your shoulder suddenly bumped into someone’s chest. The impact made you stumble backward. “ahh—” before you could fall, a hand instinctively reached out toward you, but you quickly stepped away. “I’m sorry, did I hurt you?” The voice was soft and truly gentle. You slowly looked up. He's tall, has a broad shoulders, pale skin, sharp jawline, perfect features.
Your breath almost caught in your throat when you realized who it was.
Jake — the campus prince.
Everyone knew him. The top student, captain of multiple organizations, naturally handsome, rich, respectful — almost disgustingly perfect. Girls practically threw themselves at him daily, yet he never seemed interested in any of them. And now he was staring at you with genuine concern in his eyes.
You stand up immediately in panic and moved away “are you okay?” he asked. His voice is soft, feels like a heaven. “do you want me to take you to the clinic?” he asked again with a genuine concern. He carefully tried to approach you, but the moment his hand almost touched your shoulder, panic flashed across your face. You stepped back immediately when he almost touch your shoulders.
“okay,” he quietly said, understanding right away. “I won’t touch you. But seriously… are you hurt anywhere?” You didn’t answer, just looked at him normally. You simply brushed past him and walked away, you were already late for class anyway.
That should’ve been the end of it. But somehow... Jake started appearing everywhere after that.
A week later, you sat alone on the rooftop during lunch break, your favorite place in the entire campus. The sky above you was painted in soft shades of blue and gold. The cool wind wrapped around your body like a comforting embrace, and the distant chirping of birds sounded almost melodic against the silence. Up there, everything felt peaceful and safe.
You closed your eyes for a moment —
“feels kinda lonely being here alone.”
Your eyes snapped open with that familiar voice. Jake sat beside you casually, placing a strawberry drink in front of you. It was your favorite. “How did you even know I liked this?” you asked suspiciously. He only smiled softly at you, “It wasn’t that hard to notice. You're always buying it every recess.”
You rolled your eyes and stood up. “It’s not lonely here, It’s peaceful. And what are you even doing here? are you stalking me?” as you tried to leave, his fingers instinctively wrapped around your wrist to stop you. Your body froze for a moment, fear immediately shot through your chest. “Don’t touch me without permission!” you snapped, pulling your hand away harshly.
Jake looked startled, then guilty.
“I’m sorry,” he said softly. “I just… noticed you’re always alone up here—” “So what if I am?” you shot back coldly. “I prefer it that way. So, can you just leave me alone already? You’re ruining my peace.” Instead of getting offended, Jake laughed quietly under his breath. It wasn’t mocking, It sounded… fond.
“You’re cute when you’re angry,” he murmured softly to himself.
Jake kept finding ways to stay around you. Sometimes he’d leave strawberry drinks on your desk before class started, sometimes small gifts would magically appear inside your locker, sometimes he’d sit beside you on the rooftop without saying a word, simply sharing the silence with you.
You kept pushing him away, but he never stopped trying. And strangely enough… he never forced himself into your life either. He was patient, careful, gentle.
When you ignored him, he smiled anyway. When you glared at him, he teased you softly. When you got irritated, he simply laughed and apologized.
Little by little, without even realizing it, you started talking to him more. Your conversations became longer, your walls became weaker, and for the first time in your life, a man didn’t make you feel afraid.
Jake treated you like you mattered, like you were someone precious, and it terrified you how much you began craving that feeling. You found yourself waiting for his messages, looking for him in crowded hallways, smiling unconsciously whenever he appeared beside you. The door you spent years locking tightly shut, slowly opened just for him.
By the time graduation arrived, you had already accepted the truth.
And for the first time ever, you were willing to risk your heart. You planned everything carefully — after the ceremony, you were finally going to confess, or maybe ask him out, maybe tell him how much he changed your life. You even rehearsed your words repeatedly in your head.
Graduation day was chaotic, everyone surrounded Jake constantly — asking for pictures, congratulating him, calling his name over and over again. You stood there from afar, clutching your gift for him tightly. You're patiently waiting — waiting for the perfect moment.
Night eventually fell over the campus, filled with loud music, laughter, and celebration. With a tired sigh, you finally called your driver. “can you pick me up already?” You waited beneath a large tree near the parking area, hugging yourself against the cold night breeze. That’s when you heard voices nearby.
You couldn’t see them clearly because of the darkness, only their silhouettes hidden beneath the shadows. Then — “Jake, just agree already, babe.” Your heart stopped, your entire body went cold. “Come on,” the girl whined playfully. “We’re getting engaged soon anyway. Why won’t you kiss me?” The world around you suddenly felt suffocating, like someone had wrapped chains around your chest and tightened them mercilessly. Your breathing became uneven. Pain exploded inside you so violently that you physically had to cover your mouth to stop yourself from sobbing out loud.
It was him. It was Jake. You're sure it was him. The same Jake who made you believe love could be gentle, the same Jake who slowly pulled you out of your darkness. And all this time… He already belonged to someone else.
Tears streamed uncontrollably down your face as you backed away from the scene. You ran. You didn’t wait for your driver anymore, you didn’t think, you just flagged down a taxi desperately and climbed inside while trying not to break apart completely. Every breath hurt, every heartbeat felt like knives stabbing directly into your chest. You cried silently the entire ride home.
When you arrived at the mansion, nothing welcomed you except silence. No parents waiting for you, no warm congratulations for graduating, no comforting embrace. Only emotionless housemaids quietly doing their jobs and security guards standing like statues around the enormous empty house. The mansion had always felt cold. But tonight… It felt unbearable.
You slowly walked through the dark hallway, your graduation medal still hanging around your neck like a cruel joke. You had finally allowed yourself to love someone, and somehow, life still found a way to prove your fears right.
Men hurt people. Love leaves. And in the end, the only person you could ever truly rely on… Was yourself.
Jake tried everything just to reach you — messages, calls, new accounts, different social media platforms — but you blocked every single one of them. Then you left the country because it was what your parents wanted. You moved to France and never looked back.
Now, years later, you had become a successful doctor.
You returned to Korea to visit the house you once called home — your family house. A few weeks after arriving, you went to a shopping mall to replace some of the old things you had left behind before moving away. While looking around, a little girl suddenly bumped into your leg. She's cute and looks like a 4 year old girl. “Ouch—”
She looked up at you with a pout on her face. Worried, you immediately knelt down in front of her to check if she was hurt. “Hey, honey, are you okay? I’m sorry, I didn’t notice you were there. Does anything hurt? hm?” you asked softly. She just looked at you, she's about to tear up. You looked genuinely concerned that you instinctively pulled her into a gentle hug. She wasn’t crying, but her trembling lips and watery eyes showed that she was close to tears.
“Where are your parents?” you asked after looking into her eyes. Her eyes looked strangely familiar, very familiar. A moment later, a man approached the two of you. “Sorry for the trouble, miss.” Your heart almost stopped.
Soft, deep, comforting… dangerously familiar.
You were about to look up when the little girl suddenly slipped out of your arms and ran toward the man. “Dada!” She hugged his leg tightly. And slowly, you lifted your head to meet his — the moment your eyes met his, your breathing stopped.
The man you loved the most. And then, your chest tightened painfully. “Is that… his daughter?” your mind whispered. You're stunned as he is too. You can see his eyes — it looks like he had seen a ghost — his own ghost. It was really him. The same eyes, the same voice, and the same person you spent years trying to forget. “Y-you… is it really you?” he asked quietly. His voice sounded like a man calling out to someone he had missed for far too long.
“So… you really did get married and have a child now,” you thought bitterly. You didn't say it loud, you just looked at him while thinking about the memories. “She bumped into me earlier. I didn’t notice her, I’m sorry,” you explained softly, forcing yourself to stay calm. Your hands were slightly shaking, your heart is pounding so fast. “I was asking if she got hurt, but she wouldn’t answer me. If it’s okay, maybe I could buy her something she wants as an apology?” you asked politely. You looked at the little girl, she's so innocent — she looks like Jake.
Before Jake could even respond, a woman approached him with a sweet smile and gently carried the little girl into her arms. “Jake, I’m taking Astrell upstairs for a bit. We need to grab something,” she said warmly. Then the woman glanced at you in confusion. “Who’s this?” Jake stayed silent and didn't answer the woman besides her.
“We’ll be back soon, bye~” she said cheerfully before walking away with the child without asking further questions. The silence between you and Jake became unbearable — it's thick and unpredictable. You guys wasn't minding the people around. “Well… everything’s fine now, so I should get going. Thank you, and sorry again,” you said softly while he continued staring at you like he still couldn’t believe you were standing in front of him. You turned around, ready to leave. But before you could walk away, Jake suddenly grabbed your wrist.
Your eyes widened in shock.
“W-what are you doing…?” you asked quietly, unable to process what was happening. “Can we talk?” he asked desperately. For a moment, your heart weakened, but then your eyes drifted to the direction where the woman and child disappeared. You closed your eyes gentle and inhaled the hair calmly. You slowly opened it once you already calmed yourself. You forced yourself to pull your hand away. “I’m sorry,” you whispered. “But I still have a lot of things to do.” You hurriedly left the mall, your vision blurry as you tried to hold yourself together.
The moment you reached your car and shut the door behind you, everything collapsed. A broken sob escaped your lips. Your hands trembled against the steering wheel as tears continuously streamed down your face. No matter how hard you tried to stop crying, the pain only grew worse.
It felt like your chest was being stabbed over and over again without mercy. “I-It was... It was really him.. he… he has a wife and a child…” Your breathing became uneven. “Why… why does it have to be like this…? I should be happy for him…” you cried weakly. You want to scream and crash the steering wheel but you couldn’t. You feel weak and devastated. You wanted to scream from how unbearable the pain was, but your voice refused to come out. Your chest felt so tight, as if someone was slowly taking away your ability to breathe.
Years had already passed, yet you still loved him.
You really thought there was still hope. You thought maybe, someday, fate would let the two of you meet again and continue where everything ended. But reality was cruel. There was no more “you and him.” And the possibility became even more impossible now that he already had a family of his own.
You covered your mouth as another painful sob escaped from your lips. Every memory of him came rushing back all at once — his smile, his voice, the way he looked at you earlier like he had never forgotten you. And somehow, that hurt even more, vecause even after all those years, you still love him, but it was already too late.
When you finally arrived at your mansion, your body felt completely numb. The moment you stepped inside, your knees weakened. You dropped onto the floor helplessly as tears continued falling endlessly from your eyes. The silence of the huge mansion only made everything feel emptier. The other servants were looking at you, and just continue their works. No one cares — no one dared to ask or check you up. And it feels really heavy and hurt even more.
“Why it's always like this...” you whisper.
You looked lifeless and hopeless. Like someone who had just lost the reason they kept going all these years. You hugged yourself tightly while crying alone in the cold darkness of your home, trying desperately to ease the unbearable ache inside your chest. But no matter how much you cried, the pain never disappeared.
That night, unable to bear the pain anymore, you went to a bar. You kept drinking glass after glass, hoping the alcohol would somehow numb the ache inside your chest. But no matter how much you drank, the pain stayed. Everything around you slowly became blurry, you're feeling dizzy and you don't know what's going on anymore. The loud music, the flashing lights, the voices around you — they all started mixing together until you could barely understand what was happening anymore.
Then someone suddenly approached you. “Hey, miss… wanna hook up?” the stranger said with a smirk. You rolled your eyes and you immediately frowned when he tried to touch your arm, quickly brushing his hand away. “Leave…” you muttered weakly but coldly, but the man didn’t listen. You tried pushing him away, but your body felt too weak from the alcohol while he remained annoyingly persistent. He was about to grab you again when suddenly — punch!
The man staggered backward after someone punched him hard enough to make the entire bar gasp in shock. “Leave her alone.” A cold voice echoed through the air.
His eyes were sharp and dangerous as he stood protectively in front of you. The atmosphere around him felt terrifyingly tense that even the stranger immediately backed away after realizing he wasn’t someone to mess with. When the man finally left and people slowly lost interest in the commotion, Jake turned toward you. And instantly, his expression softened — the same eyes you once loved — full of gentleness and concern.
It made your chest ache all over again. You wanted to push him away, you wanted to scream at him, to blame him for making your feelings return so painfully after all these years. But you couldn’t. “Are you okay?” he asked softly. “Why are you drinking at this hour dressed like this?” his worried tone irritated you. Your brows furrowed as you looked away. “why do you care?” you slurred drunkenly. “can you just leave me alone?” You weren’t even fully aware of what you were saying anymore.
Jake sighed quietly after seeing how drunk you already were.
“You’re really drunk…” he murmured. “I’ll take you home.”You tried resisting weakly, but before you could complain further, he carefully carried you in a bridal style and brought you outside. The cold night air brushed against your skin as he gently placed you inside his car. “Where are you staying right now?” he asked while fastening your seatbelt. “What’s the address?”
Instead, you rested your head against the car window, your eyes slowly closing from exhaustion and alcohol until you eventually drifted into sleep. Jake glanced at you quietly. Since you refused to answer and he had no idea where to bring you, he tightened his grip on the steering wheel for a moment before deciding to book a hotel room instead. He was about to leave but you grabbed his neck “please... stop making me cry.. stay...” you're too drunk and you don't know what exactly are you doing.
He didn't try to push you away.
He kissed you softly and desperately, and you're responding to his kisses and touch. His lips traveled to your neck to your collarbone. His breath is heavy, his touch is so gentle and pure.
Your tears fell down as he touched you with gentleness. Finally, you let him in. You couldn't stop yourself. You want to be selfish for once.
