Liam

No, but I might have a problem if you are just using me to fulfill this quota of freckles. And here I thought I was special.

You can be plenty special, but it doesn't change who you are to me.

Your quota of freckles?

Yeah. You got a problem with quotas?

Can I help you?

Yeah. Where the hell've you been? I can't reach my quota of freckles without you.

..Right.

Yet, being the keyword. 

I didn't say the word yet.

It’s not safe. I’ve got enough common sense to know not to risk going down the hall when it’s in such condition.

You take life way too seriously, mate. Really. I've been doing this for hours now, and I don't have any problems.

You’re affecting me by making me unable to get back to my room.

No. I never said you couldn't. I just said I don't know if it's safe.

“Have fun” in a way that only affects you, then.

It does only affect me. You're not having fun. So it's not affecting you.

Perhaps find a more productive way to have fun?

It is productive! Having fun is anything but a waste of time.

Why would you do that?

'Cos I wanted to have fun, and it took coating the floor in wax.

Okay, but I kind of covered the entire hallway in wax. I don't know if it's safe.

No, I'm Liam.

Not yet.

No I haven't!

Okay. Well. I'm not hurt. Are you?

Watch it!

Cheer up, mate. Come on, it's fun!