Itās January 2nd and Iām not laying in my own bed with a freshly washed face. Without applying my face products, without nutritious meals fuelling me and without any speck of my life from the past.
Ive been up for 2 days doing blow and I ruined another Christmas with my drinking. My mental health is at such a low and I canāt allow myself to sink. My whole world has shattered and Iāve never felt so insignificant. Iām really exhausted of ending up in the same situations and resorting to the same coping mechanisms. Iām done with alcohol and cocaine, Iām done with the amount of time it has robbed me. Iām done feeling like this.
Nothing feels safe anymore and the areas where I found success seem to have turned on me. My confidence and self worth have plummeted and I feel like nothing. Iām at such a low in life.
I welcome 2026 with open arms. Iām welcoming a empty shell that I will creat with the same care I give my characters in sims. Iām entering as someone who does not drink under any circumstances. Iām welcoming it knowing that I truly am the only obstacle between fulfilling my life or being forgotten into the abyss.


















