alex, polish, she/her. main acc is @hajstra. i don't talk there much
blocking people who:
put selfies in the band's tag just to have more views (if it's band-related, like cosplay or halloween make-up, it's all fine);
spam the tag wth any unrelated stuff tbh, i'm tired, man;
spoil the band members' identities, obviously (two previous things happen more often, that's why this is on the 3rd place only);
not tag nsfw art properly (please, it's just basic courtesy);
are terfs and other twats. obviously.
not a fan of fanfiction/headcanons about real people (not gonna block blogs for that, only tags. if you have your own lore for characters and not the actual people behind the masks, we're good. most of the time, anyway)
not horny about the band either, but i don't mind y'all being horny. unless someone gets seriously parasocial about it
layout matching with @ancientbygone π
i don't have any tagging system, cause i'm a messy and chaotic person and any attempts at changing that went to shit. if you want me to tag something specfic though, please do not hesitate to contact me!
there are, however, two tags that i'm consistent with:
#sleep token't (for posts unrelated to the band; courtesy of @moonchild-in-blue's amazing idea for this tag π),
#alex vs the mortifying ordeal of having her art perceived (my art tag, rarely used)
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finally found it in me to write my thoughts/worldbuilding on Sleep in one place. this is taking so much courage to post this to the public, no joke, so i hope it's entertaining! not sure how much sense it all will make, but nevertheless.
okay, so. i just don't think Sleep is any sort of sleep/dream deity. not for any solid reason, just because 1) the only descriptions we get of it are secondhand from what Sleep has told to Vessel & i personally have no reason to trust Sleep with how manipulative that shit is and 2) i think it would be more fun that way, especially taking the first point into account. i legit just think that Sleep lied to Vessel about its nature to further whatever goals it had and Vessel passed the information onto us oblivious to the truth. i still think it's a relatively powerful supernatural force though. easy enough for a human like Vessel to be convinced that it is a god. more of a feeling than an actual entity, but still with its own sentience and wants and goals. could be whatever makes the most sense to anyone, but my personal take on what Sleep is instead of a dream god (what it is in my version of the lore) is that it's all the desires of every living thing congealed into a single being with a mind of its own.Β
[cont. under the cut]
i think that works well personally! the lyrical themes of give/take and longing and Wanting from both sides make sense with it. even the "i want to want to live, and so do you" in Fall For Me. Sleep is driven by wanting, and being made from wanting itself, when it gets what it wants it just continues to go further, to the next step of its desires, ever insatiable. it becomes entwined with Vessel because when they meet for the first time, they want the same thing. they're both dying, and still they want to want to live. to be more precise, Sleep wants fuel; its existence relies largely on humans, and it needs someone who feels strongly and passionately (please donβt ask me why itβs dying, i donβt even know and donβt want to look too much into it). Vessel, on the other hand, wants a way to turn around his life that he may or may not have driven into the ground, and he believes that it cannot be fixed by any existing means, which is why he's lost all hope in living anymore. but those two desires perfectly coincide, do they not? they can help each other get what they want. so they try.Β
it doesn't work out. it backfires horribly, in fact. i've talked about it before, but i think it's very important to mention regardless. Sleep, being pretty much desire incarnate, may have harbored certain negative feelings of its own towards humanity, but they never would've become anything if it were not for Vessel. Vessel's anger at the world around him, the way he believes he has been wronged by everyone, is palpable, and with Sleep having to draw on Vessel's emotions to survive for the time being, that anger infects it, too. the passive unnamed negativity becomes a strong desire to take revenge. with all of it combined, Sleep's supernatural power and Vessel's uncontrollable rage slowly takes over both of them, and Him is born, a despicable thing. it's all-consuming blind rage taking on a mind of its own, much like how Sleep came to be but so much more unstable and volatile. the revenge on humanity doesn't go further than a single person torn to bits with bare hands and teeth, both too dull to be effective, but that thing is nothing it not fucking determined. it does fall apart immediately after, though, because it was barely together as is and killing someone was the tipping point for Vessel's consciousness somewhere deep in there. plus Vesselβs body honestly couldn't sustain Him for much longer. sorry for the tangent, i really love talking about that fucked up abomination.
but yeah, this experience changes both of them forever. Sleep gets a taste of feeling human emotions to a full extent, arguably even more so because of just how much Vessel feels; Vessel gets a taste of wielding inhuman power and releasing his emotions through it. Sleep's usual straightforward path of progression (just gaining more power, more control over more things) diverges as it realizes that it needs to feel like humans do again. Vessel, on the other hand, is fucking terrified of Him or something similar coming back, so he closes himself off and tries to repress his feelings back down again. he wonβt let Sleep in again no matter how much he wants to be able to express his emotion with the same intensity as he feels them again. Sleep is well aware that Vessel wants that sort of relationship back, too. Sundowning is essentially Sleep trying to win Vessel back over and convince him to βhelp each otherβ once again, and realizing by Blood Sport that if Vessel doesnβt think he can handle it this time, he just needs to be made better suited for it. unfortunately, Sleep finds that breaking Vesselβs spirit, making him entirely emotionally dependent on it, and practically isolating him from the only people he interacts with on the daily (his bandmates) by stripping away his humanity in their eyes is very much a working strategy for getting him where it wants him to be.
Sleepβs tactics of manipulation areβ¦ algorithmic? for the lack of a better word, in the way that it doesn't really have a reason why exactly it's doing things other than that they're what's worked on Vessel so far. no real understanding of human psychology and whatnot, only trial and error until it pushes the correct set of buttons in the right order at the right time. it does learn more and more as their relationship progresses.Β Sleep also doesnβt exactly lie; itβs shapeless by nature & only able to embody what others put into it, and even then to a certain extent. it only really talks & shows itself to Vessel at any point because of their connection, and itβs able to draw from all of his emotions instead of just desire like any other human for that same reason. no matter what form Sleep takes, itβs always akin to a shadow, although the exact way the shadows look depends on who Sleep is showing itself to - drawing (pun intended) from Vesselβs artistic heart, Sleep looks to him like pencil on paper. Sleep does distort reality much in the same way that any emotion might - it pushes things to their extremes, makes them seem larger than life to get a response. as it grows and becomes more powerful in itself, it stops being able to appear as something smaller than it is, so pretty much any form it takes is an exaggeration of what itβs imitating. this ties directly into the mimics (see this (tmbte) and this (sundowning) for context), but also just. anything that Sleep appears as to Vessel. during TPWBYT, Vessel feels like his emotional repression is suffocating him, and Sleepβs most commonly assumed form during that time is a literal ocean that Vessel is often trapped in, drowning. during TMBTE, Vessel feels like he cannot escape his situation no matter how miserable it makes him feel, and Sleep appears to him as a reaper, taking that thought to its extreme conclusion that Vessel's only salvation might as well be death. even though Sleep isnβt a dream deity, its appearances still function on dream logic somewhat; it invokes the feeling of something in oneβs subconscious that what theyβre seeing is the actual thing Sleep is imitating, even if the actual visual resemblance is minor (that makes sense right please tell me it does).
what happens to Sleep once Vessel breaks free from him for goodβ¦ iβm not entirely sure, honestly. itβs definitely not going to just disappear; a being of desire is going to exist as long as we still feel it. it isnβt gonna chase after Vessel, and iβm not really sure if itβd try and seek out another person to form a similar connection with. maybe we, the audience of Sleep Token living and feeling through Vesselβs music that has come from all his pain, sustain it well enough now. i donβt think it matters that much anyhow; Sleep is entirely unscathed either way afterwards, unlike Vessel. maybe iβll figure out a little more eventually.
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Sundowning-era mimics of the vessels. iii and iv aren't in the picture enough for Sleep to capture their essence properly. the "Vessel" isn't exactly an intentional mimic either, but more on that later.
design breakdowns under the cut:
[obligatory βwhen talking about the vessels, iβm talking about charactersβ disclaimer]
if you're unfamiliar with the main idea, please check out the TMBTE post.
Sleep/"Vessel"/Vessel mimic (sort of?)
the thing with this design is that, as previously mentioned, this isn't exactly an intentional mimic of Vessel. rather than that, it's almost Sleep's "default" state during Sundowning, stemming from him and Vessel having their identities heavily blurred prior. in this form, Sleep tends to mirror Vessel's movements almost perfectly or have them complete a certain pattern (see: Decimation and Higher artworks). most of the silhouette is very blurred; the parts that usually appear the clearest are the ones closest to Vessel himself, but the feet tend to always be blurred and give the appearance of floating. the face is nonexistent under the hood, replaced by protruding beams (?) that are supposed to resemble the Sundowning logo. generally, they face wherever Sleep does without following any three-dimensional rules, but for front views like this they just face up. its design is way better understood if you look at those to artworks, again.
βiiβ/ii mimic
this "ii" design mostly follows the same ideas as the TMBTE "ii" - hiding his face behind a hood & veil and standing timidly by with his hands folded. ii is the one person Sleep has had the opportunity to observe while intertwined with Vessel, but that's the only thing he got to do - observe and nothing more. to Sleep, ii doesn't have much meaning, but he recognizes that ii means a lot to Vessel, so he plays on that as much as he can. the hood of "ii's" cloak has a Mannaz rune on it turned upside down. the rune is part of the Sleep Token logo both old and new, and here with its meaning of mankind and community it's supposed to represent ii being connected to Vessel's mortal/human life while Sleep is his divine. the inversion of it is really just due to "ii" being Sleep's twisted image of ii. not much more to it.
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Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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haha guys isn't it annoying when you can't afford top surgery and then due to a long set of circumstances involving a supernatural being you briefly cease to exist as a person of your own and the ungodly abomination inhabiting your body walks around with tits out. happens to all of us right
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