Creature of the New Page

the goal is to always have days so good that you forget you have a phone

if you are a parent, or may become one, or you are otherwise likely to arrive in the situation of caring for a child while they eat, promise me this: if a child doesn't like a certain food or food group, you will ask them WHY. and specifically, you will pay attention to either confirming or ruling out "it makes my mouth itch" or "it makes my stomach hurt," both of which are medically important info that children may not provide unprompted. which i know because this PSA has been brought to you by "i spent my entire childhood and much of my early teens eating peas and lentils while wondering why everyone else liked the Violently Itchy Mouth Sensation so much, like were they a bunch of legume masochists or something, before i finally realized that Violently Itchy Mouth Sensation was in fact a sinister demon appearing only to me, and her true demonic name was: Legume Allergy"

sorry im absolutely too floored by the fact you just called me 'lizardsex' to give you an answer

This exact phenomenon is why there’s now a hyphen in my url.

Something something- prevalence of generated content (in all of its forms) symptom of an ever-hungry algorithm which demands that content be farmed by any means necessary to satisfy an imaginary customer something something.

The algorithm is not the audience, nor an actual person, and yet it must be catered to with frequent content, tagged for visibility and scanned for inappropriate materials- all of which must be done correctly or it falls into a pit of obscurity.

The algorithm demands content faster than the average person can make, and so a machine is made to create content to feed it. But it is always hungry, and so the machine makes more, and faster. And the algorithm demands more, and faster. And so a machine feeds a machine, both pretending to be human, each providing nothing of substance in return- and thus mimics the cold corporate hands that pretend to have invented it.

I mean.... you don't have to write descriptions. But there's a word for that: a script. Congrats you're not a novelist, you're a very inefficient playwrite who writes plays that go on for several hours. Go pitch it to netflix.

#not to be pedantic but even scripts have description

"prioritize character development and plot" by. skipping everything but dialogue? Æthelred, you skipped the part where 90% of the character development and plot is

I actually do think it’s better for abusers and abusive characters to realize the harm their past actions caused and seek to do better than be literally or metaphorically executed for their crimes

Something about how society cares more about punishing the wicked than about making the world a better place, and how many people really struggle to shake that.

just saw two 12 year olds walk by, one holding a watermelon bong and the other holding a camp stove. i fucking love seattle

smelling the most rank weed i have ever smelt rn. just some bad bad shit.

they walked by me. cast me suspicious looks. and then set up very obviously in some bushes. love that these middle schoolers think i’m not a narc

i can see them fucking taking rips this is killing me. should i go ask for a hit

asked about the camp stove and one of them said “i don’t even know i am so fucked up”

i was genuinely publicly fucking crying in this park before those kids showed up. now i’ll be fucking over the moon for the rest of the night. they’re like angels. little stoner engineer angels.

nothing could have prepared me for the watermelon bong NOT being a bong that was watermelon themed

also part of growing up is realizing that the embarrassing music you liked in your early teen years still goes hard as hell