FINAL DEVOTION

OOC

“………” And if he answered ‘yes’ in return, in full honesty ( painful honesty ), what then? “I don’t want you to be hurt…… it’d be cruel of me….” 

on your tongue

your love is language. it's the way you say goodbye, good morning, how was your day? love for you is less something to talk about and more something that weaves itself into your speech without permission (and, of course, with it). love comes out of you everyday in the easiest way to understand; what's the point of feeling it if you don't say it? sing it? scream it? it bubbles up and spills over anyway.

More heat— this time, across his face. It was when their gazes met. Again. How many times had this happened until now? A faint shade of something dusted his cheeks ( whatever colour, it was too dark to tell, he hoped ).

Shinji couldn’t look away, so he said nothing, lingering in Kaworu’s familiar form.

Familiar everything, it should be. Red eyes, the gentle strands of silver hair falling into them. A feather touch on his forehead with a smile just as warm. An odd thought at the back of his mind: he didn’t know this before. Before him. But he was sure— if Kaworu suddenly said something now, he’d still feel like that. Shinji was ill prepared for him, always. Maybe routine was never as easy as he used to think. Helpless, his heart beat just a bit faster. He hadn’t noticed any change in Kaworu’s.

“Sorry……” For what? Shinji’s gaze finally trailed off as he paused, so quiet. “I…. um…….. I must’ve fell asleep again.” His palm relaxed, barely moving.

           Kaworu’s lips spread wider, a reassuring smile to calm the speeding beat of Shinji-kun’s heart. Perhaps it made it faster. It was difficult to tell. His attention wasn’t on his pulse but rather the dark eyes that shyly strayed from his own. He knew that one might be tempted to free the other at this moment. Accept his apology and part ways for the night. But he had no interest in that. As much as the other boy might like to escape his embarrassment, Kaworu was content to hold him close as long as Shinji stayed near. 

        “What were you dreaming about?” 

“ . . . ”