little birds.

"i usually only step in here because it's cool and quiet. you?"

" you should switch to tate modern. a lot bigger and no one wants to see that crap. twice as cool and quiet. " she returned her gaze to the paintings. " i don't know. sometimes it's just fun to look at art. then i start thinking how i should go to an art class and see if i can learn how to paint. "

"  well  ,  if  i  told  you  who  the  guest  was  that  would  ruin  the  surprise  .  .  .  but  let's  just  say  not  all  the  drinking  was  done  on  camera  ,  "  she  says  ,  shooting  feyza  a  wink  that  hopefully  conveys  her  guess  wasn't  that  far  off  base  (  or  even  off  of  the  base  at  all  )  .  the  quickening  sounds  of  feyza's  steps  remind  aria  to  slow  down  ,  often  found  it  hard  to  not  constantly  walk  like  she  was  in  a  rush  to  get  somewhere  to  avoid  being  caught  in  the  stream  of  london  foot  traffic  .  "  wait  ,  which  guy  ?  jeremy  allen  -  white  or  the  other  one  ?  to  be  fair  i  like  them  both  but  their  eyes  are  so  blue  it  honestly  fucking  freaks  me  out  .  .  .  but  that  actually  might  make  good  content  ,  thanks  babe  ,  "  she  says  ,  making  a  mental  note  to  bring  that  up  to  her  producers  later  .  their  steps  fall  in  near  perfect  sync  as  they  stroll  down  the  sidewalk  ,  it's  refreshing  to  be  out  with  feyza  ,  their  blossoming  friendship  like  a  breath  of  fresh  air  in  an  environment  that  seems  to  rarely  allow  that  opportunity  .  "oh  my  god  i  heard  ,  what  a  fucking  train  wreck  ,  i  heard  about  fairchild  ,  "  she  tacks  on  ,  honestly  kind  of  regretting  missing  it  simply  for  the  show  of  it  all  .  she  can't  help  but  let  out  a  soft  chuckle  at  the  implication  that  meeting  someone  like  bernard  aldridge  was  a  special  occasion  ,  "  if  i  didn't  know  any  better  i'd  say  it  sounds  like  you've  got  a  crush  ,  "  she  teases  ,  sneaking  a  look  at  feyza  in  her  peripheral  to  see  if  it  warrants  any  kind  of  reaction  .  "  i  already  thought  you  were  an  introvert  but  if  that's  the  most  exciting  place  you've  been  since  i've  last  seen  you  then  we  definitely  have  to  work  on  getting  you  out  more  .  .  .  genuinely  ,  when's  the  last  time  you've  been  out  on  a  non-work  related  outing  ?  and  going  out  for  dinner  doesn't  count  .  "

" i don't like surprises. i like spoilers. " but she wouldn't push. not when she had received a half answer from aria. a soft glint in the woman's eyes could say a lot more than actual words. " that guy. jeremy. the calvin klein guy. he's so popular but he doesn't seem annoying. " unlike most celebrities. she liked knowing the money-bringers of her company and celebrities, influencers, micro-influencers... they were all important to her. professionally. but most of them were whacky. her breath hitched in her throat and she gaped at aria. she was too old to be using the word 'crush'. " no... i do not. but it was nice being talked to. paid attention to. i feel so small in those rooms most of the time. " the people who had navigated through galas, evenings at the opera, fundraisers, royal ascots and whatnots had star power and seemed natural at the setting. very different from feyza who, for a reason, preferred to be tightly glued to the sides of her friends. " but dinners are what i like... " feyza pouted. " i honestly don't know. it might have been a bridal shower last year. clubbing is exhausting, and cocktail bars are loud. my natural habitant has little to no room for strangers. it's a shame but at the same time i don't know how much energy i'm willing to spend on meeting new people. "

❝ how long do you think it'll take until someone takes one too many and starts uncontrollably giggling ? ❞ he'd seen a couple people finish their glasses when it's common knowledge that you're only supposed to be taking small sips and pretending to know each and every ingredient in the drink from said tiny sip alone. that being said, he did just that but more for theatrics than to actually taste the wine, no. he needed to do it so his next line made sense. ❝ hmm, this might pair well with a steak dinner next friday at eight. of course, you'd have to be there so we can test it out. ❞

" depends on how fun people are. you can't giggle if people around you are dull or serious. to be honest i wouldn't mind being in the giggling phase already. it has its moments. " wine was a fickle friend. usually the last glass seemed like the third last. it was hard to know when you had drank too much. she swirled the wine in the glass, only because it was fun. the did not really taste the difference between aerated and straight-from-the-bottle wine. she was fortunate she hadn't copied him and taken a sip — it would have been spat out. her brows rose as did the temperature of the room. was this a– no. he was going to throw some wild merger idea at her and was trying to butter her up. surely. it made more sense. and she was a sensible person ! her heart had no business beating this quickly. her ego had no business expanding at such rate. " er... i mean, yeah. yes. " she cleared her throat and attempted to recalibrate her pronunciation to fit the present company. " yes. that'd be lovely. " why was it when she tried to sound serious and almost british, the word 'lovely' slipped past her lips ? every damn time. " do you have a favourite spot ? "

❝ like i said, no trouble waiting here but i'll cover my eyes then. ❞ and look through the space he'd be opening between his fingers if it truly came to it. the comment about mini golf got a short laugh out of him; was it really so hard ? maybe she just had not found a patient enough golfing partner yet. and it proved his theory right once she hit the ball and managed to get it almost in the hole. ❝ you're a pro already. ❞ a little boosting of the ego wouldn't do her any harm. ❝ for my own good ? i don't think so, no. let me show you my options. ❞ bernard positioned himself next to her yet at a good enough distance as to not seem like a creep trying to get too close, just enough that they'd have the same angle to look at the other groups scattered around the property. ❝ there's in-hye lee, that should be self-explanatory. and then on that one is arnold wisham; that man doesn't clock out ever. there's the stock market bunch i told you about, they'll bore you out of the game. there and there are b-2 and b-3, it is by family rules that multiple alderidge brothers aren't allowed to play against each other in these settings, it gets too competitive. and last, but most definitely not least, bradford thornbury and the pro-likes. higher level but i'd still have to listen to my father ramble about the fresh produce in his garden. so not only are you the best option, you're also my savior. ❞ and he was only half-exaggerating. ❝ what do you mean ? i only saw two. ❞ and he had. ❝ so fulfilling. it always brings me great pride to see my students do so well. don't forget about me when the olympic medal comes. ❞

" oh she scares me, " feyza admitted with a laugh as her eyes skimmed over the new ceo. she was only half joking. " and him i don't know so i'll take your word for it. " workaholics were a dime in a dozen in their business. common and boring. " b-2 and b-3 ? is r2d2 related to you too ? " she might have assumed that he wasn't nerdy enough to get the reference but... considering he was one of the top players in the entertainment industry, he had to be familiar with disney's biggest franchise. even at a surface level. " feyza keskin, the saviour. hmm... i like the sound of that. it's a lot more dramatic than cto of app-h. " she crouched down to snatch the ball from the hole. she slipped it into her pocket. " c'mon. i think it's time for a high five. " she lifted her hand, begging dear god that he would not leave her hanging. " i'll dedicate the whole speech to you. don't worry. " she took a step to the side to allow some space for him to finish his game. " are you coming to the wine tasting ? "

how did she say no but we do get hungry without sounding like a quitter? keiko had no need to be good at this game but clearly feyza did and it was hard to argue with her. keiko didn't want to be seen as someone who couldn't follow through. "i don't know... i'm sure that's not a bad score." she glanced at the course ahead of them and then behind them. "i'm sure we'll get quicker as we figure it out, right?"

" if we want to finish this quicker, we could also change the rules a bit ? once the ball is this... this area. " she flailed her arms around herself. struggling to find the correct golfing term — green. " this nice grass around the hole. once the ball is here, we're done with that hole. it's a lot more fun to make long shots, right ? "

keiko has made years of mini golf under her belt so this was the only part she was kinda confident in. mostly, she'd just wanted to drive the golf cart. she could see her companion getting frustrated through. she wasn't sure what do about that. "it's okay. i can go and we'll be done with this round." she looked at the caddy standing near the flag, ready to pull it up as soon as they got close to the hole. he'd been waiting a while. "we don't have to play all eighteen. it's started to get kind of hot out here."

" but are we quitters, keiko ? " her pride had already been wounded, how could she allow golf to bruise her even further ? " we're playing a full 18 hole game even if it means we'll be late to the dinner. " her frustration was making her extremely petty. " what kind of a score do average players get ? is it like 300 ? i think i can manage something like that. "

❝ that is not necessary, i'm in no rush to join the men who think the best conversation topic is the stock market. ❞ and most of them were around his age too, which almost made him wonder if he should be as enthusiastic about it as they all were. ❝ but, if you'll allow me to give you a tip, try bending your knees a little more and keep your feet aligned with your shoulders, see if it helps. ❞ bernard said, positioning himself in the exact way he'd described in case she needed to see it. he'd spent too many summers hearing his father say those exact words to not remember them. ❝ unless you saying this because i have not managed to get the idea of scaring me away out of your head. ❞

" yeah, okay, so– " she pulled her shoulders back and assumed a proper straight posture. she needed to feel like a respectable person when she shared the truth with him. " i sort of literally told everyone to not play with me because i don't know which is worse making people wait or having someone watch. i can barely handle minigolf. " golf was supposed to be a chill sport. why was it so technical ? she assumed the position as per his instructions and tried to swallow the humiliation that was daring to rise up her throat like bile. " like this, yeah ? " her arms felt stiff, that was all she could notice. but he probably wasn't a complete hack: the club felt more secure and controllable all of a sudden. just as she was about to give the move a go, his comment made her crack a note of laughter and her form broke. she shook her head. " ha ! no, it's– you're fine. you being here is fine. it just would be for your own good. okay, let's see... " a moment of hesitation before she gave the ball a gentle controlled nudge towards the hole. " oh for fuck's sake ! " the curse was loud but the laugh that followed was even louder. the ball was now mere finger width's away from being holed. " this will be my... thirty-second shot. for this hole. we don't talk about the earlier ones. " they weren't much better. she did not even bother with a proper stance but nudged the ball into the hole. at last. " you can put golf instruction on your resume now. how does it feel ? "

"  please  ,  continue  ,  "  gesturing  with  one  hand  as  the  other  rested  on  the  club  ,  saccharine  chuckles  woven  in  between  .  "  you  are  making  me  look  good  .  i'm  very  fond  of  sports  and  good  competition  but  ,  this  ,  and  american  football  are  probably  the  dumbest  things  created  by  a  man  .  of  course  –––  or  am  i  missing  another  one?  "

" i think i'm just making myself look really really really bad. being better than this takes nothing. i swear there is a three-year-old somewhere out there who could beat me. " another irritated huff escaped her as the ball kept rolling past the hole. " i feel like this is statistically impossible... " perhaps it could be all explained by the fact that feyza was, at the end of the day, a nerd. athleticism did not run in her veins. " american football is fine. calling darts a sport is where humanity erred. " she eyed the distance between her ball and the hole. just a small movement. half a meter. just fifty centimeters. she cleared her throat and stopped breathing for the duration of her swing. she had been careful — too careful. the distance got merely halved. " i'm good at swimming. i promise. "

a laugh leaving their lips, they rest their head on back of the bean bag, stretching their arms above their head. "oh, that's so true. i also like the soap-cutting ones. those are always creative." bringing their arms back down to their sides, they lean to the side to listen to feyza better, lips pursing, trying to keep themself from snorting back into laughter. "a summer holiday... with your boss and co-workers." they repeat, meeting her eyes, in a long hard stare, before they begin to laugh again. "oh we should definitely bring that up to hr and watch them try to explain it to us why it might not be the best idea. and if they think it's a good one — you know you gotta get a new hr director." they could already see the headlines, 'app-h forces their workers in a retreat'. "i think, what we could do is take time off, and actually go on a vacation. not that i don't do it often enough, but you can never have too much of a good thing. and i know you guys are rubbish at that."

" they annoy me. the ending is always so messy and uneven. i can't stand them. " she had strong opinions about internet trends ! who would she be if she didn't ? " what do you mean not everyone's willing to sacrifice their life for work ? " she was grinning widely. the idiocy of the conversation keeping her very well entertained. " i know... i keep thinking about booking a trip but there's always something to do or someone to meet. i'm also feeling very stumped with work. the developers throw these kick-ass ideas at me and that's great, yeah ? super ? but all i can think about is how i haven't had a good idea in like five years. everything comes from people who are thinking about the product and get a kick out of new features. something's wonky in my head honestly: i try to measure the profitability of the feature or the change. that's so fucking bad for creativity and for apps as well. i swear we are ruining apps. remember when games didn't have a million pop-up ads ? those were the times. " she had gotten distracted. wayyyy off topic. " anyways. yeah, maybe i will book a trip. i should go sailing. i haven't gone to greece in ages. or home... but that wouldn't be a holiday. "

"  well  ⸺  it  was  supposed  to  be  a  surprise  but  i  forgot  the  shoes  would  give  me  away  ,  "  she  chuckles  ,  right  foot  kicking  up  to  show  off  the  red  kitten  heels  who's  clack  against  the  wood  floor  completely  blew  up  the  entirety  of  her  plan  .  aria  wasn't  usually  one  to  spend  too  much  time  in  the  office  if  she  didn't  have  to  ,  much  preferred  writing  and  editing  in  the  comfort  of  her  own  home  or  favorite  cafe  rather  than  the  fluorescent  lights  that  constantly  remained  on  over  app  -  h's  headquarters  even  though  the  natural  sunlight  was  more  than  enough  during  the  day  .  "  i've  been  saving  my  lunch  appetite  for  you  ,  i  ordered  us  some  takeaway  from  that  pizza  place  a  down  the  road  ⸺  i  was  hoping  to  steal  you  away  for  a  lunch  date  ,  we  can  go  eat  in  the  park  ,  yea  ?  "  she  smiles  ,  head  already  nodding  towards  the  door  .  "  god  ,  i  would  love  to  talk  about  anything  other  than  what  i've  been  up  to  ,  we  filmed  the  season  finale  for  pub  crawl  a  few  days  ago  and  i  swear  to  god  i've  had  a  hangover  for  the  last  ,  like  ,  three  days  ⸺  i  think  for  the  first  time  in  my  life  i  got  out-drank  on  my  own  show  ,  "  she  can  still  feel  the  vodka  burning  down  her  throat  ,  gross  .  "  besides  ,  i  came  because  i  wanted  to  know  what  you've  been  up  to  .  .  .  "  she  starts  ,  waiting  for  feyza  to  catch  up  before  she  opens  the  door  and  leads  them  out  ,  "  i  feel  like  the  last  few  times  we've  seen  each  other  we've  only  talked  about  work  ,  i  wanna  know  what's  really  going  on  .  "

feyza tilted her head to catch a glimpse of the offending criminals: unsurprisingly, aria's shoes were g-o-r-g-e-o-u-s. feyza nodded approvingly. " to be fair, i think you can blame the quietness here in the office. half of the people are spending their vacation days and it's so eery here. " she sort of missed the constant background nose that came from phone calls, co-workers chit-chatting with each other, and the pings from notifications. " huh ? " feyza pointed at herself and arched a brow. " for me ? " acting normally was a secondary issue, she needed to concentrate on breathing normally. keep her focus on vitals and then she could think about how to act cool. " damn. you came prepared. " a breathy laugh escaped her and bought her a few seconds to process the information properly. " i definitely won't say no to pizza. i'm sort of starving too. thank you, seriously, thank you. " she needed an assistant. not that she was equating aria to one, but if getting food could be this quick and easy, she needed to give the idea of an assistant another chance. " wait, whoa, wait ! who was the guest ? i swear it was going to be sabrina carpenter but that... doesn't... well, i've seen you drink. like a lot of times. she doesn't give off the right kind of a vibe. " she shot an apologetic look to the woman, quickening her pace to get in sync with aria. " well ! to be honest my life isn't that exciting ? i go to work, i walk my dog, i have dinner with whoever's available that evening. i started the new season of the bear though — maybe you should get that guy on your show. people are, or were, so obsessed with him just a year ago or something. " aria and her team probably had a long list of candidates but it never hurt to offer suggestions ! " i think the most exciting thing to happen to be was the industry awards gala last month. and i swear ! oh i swear ! i heard at least ten people say it's stuffy and dull. what does that make me ? kinda sad, no ? but at least i got to talk to people. i chatted with the bernard alderidge. it was a bit weird. he was nicer than i expected. i sorta expected him to be snotty and annoying. like most eton boys. you know the type. annoying. " she wasn't sure if the man was an eton boy but feyza believed the term described his upbringing accurately enough.

❝ as long as it does not make you despise me, i'm a happy man ! ❞ and, as much as she might not believe him, he was not exaggerating by saying that. nobody would be surprised to hear that bernard enjoyed having people's affection, especially those of pretty ladies, and it was doubly wanted when said lady also happened to be someone in the same field as him who he'd been intrigued by. because the app-h shell was harder to get into. comoedia and bulletin were known enemies, but the two intersected quite a lot when it came to members of both families. they knew enough of the others and their histories. app-h inc. was new, fresh, there was no century old string he could pull for an instant connection. ❝ kind. ❞ he repeated with a smirk. for some reason, it made him think she was the kind to say "thank you" as a response to a love declaration. he found that endearing. ❝ it isn't, we're getting to know each other well through this hypothetical, are we not ? ❞ exactly what he'd wanted from the beginning. ❝ quick ! don't even have to think about it. i think the shock is better than dragging everyone's pain out only so i can have more time. it'd be far worse to see the people that care for me have some hope knowing they'll be let down rather than going abruptly. now i'm being the morbid one.❞

" yes, kind ! " she nodded furiously in an attempt to divert attention from the deepening shade of red on her cheeks. she felt silly now, under his sharp eyes. she forced out a laugh, breathy and from deep within her chest. it alleviated the tight leash of anxiousness around her lungs. " i mean sure. sure, you're absolutely right. i'm just thinking i'm bordering on psychopathic or something. but hey... maybe i've made you scared of me. " she grinned widely at him before winking her eye. she gasped loudly and gaped at him. " that was way too quick ! " she accused him. " shock is what puts people on their knees. it's harder to process, you know. " at least in feyza's opinion. her comment probably answered her own question in a way. " i don't know if this is cheating but a middle ground would be great. like being given two-ish months so you can put things in order, plan a funeral and say goodbye. i wouldn't want to be given too much time to think about it though. "

they completely lounge on the bean bags, basically horizontal, ankles crossed over one another, eyes shut with hands clasped on top of their chest. "told you this is a great napping space. the background noise is also top-notch. would rival ocean sounds for me." the clicking of the keyboards, the voices of employees talking in meetings, words impossible to discern. at her comment, they turn their head towards her way, squinting. "well, you know i wouldn't say no to that. though the employees would probably kill us over the long commuting hours. they'd prob have some right too." a pause, before they come up with a new idea. "unless... we make it so that there are dorms as well. now that would be interesting. still would make them hate us, but more interesting."

" but it fails to measure up to any random asmr video about candy wrappers. " feyza's grin played softly on her face. maybe this was what inner peace was: she was in no hurry, the things she needed to accomplish that day could wait for tomorrow, and she wasn't worrying about the future. " if it was in surrey or something and we organized a private bus every day. " she was already getting inspired ! " wait, wait, wait ! hold up. what if next summer we offer people the opportunity to work at some nice old house instead of the office ? much of our work gets done on microsoft teams anyways... " she wanted to look like a cool boss with cool ideas ! " this company is a family and what not. what's more family-like than a summer holiday ? " a small pause. " with your boss and co-workers... "