FAKE IT TIL YOU MAKE IT.

[ ... ]

“i don’t know if i can regret something that wasn’t my choice,” he mused aloud, thoughtful. “but if i could’ve chosen to stay human, i would have.” in the end, it was an easy answer– or he thought it was. all of the experiences flashed into his mind: the travel, the learning, the information, mei’s love and care. if he stayed a human he would’ve died without meeting her. he wouldn’t have lived to meet kyu, or to see seoul rebuilt from the ruins he preserved it as in his memory before. he wouldn’t have been able to look out over the canal in venice, or have his heart so moved by humanity even among all of its stupidity and war. there was some good. 

he just couldn’t forget all of the death– all of the loss and all of the grief, all of the trauma. it still outweighed the good every time. he looked down, finally diverting his gaze away from the girl’s.

of all the ways he could answer she wouldn’t have expected this one. she had heard so little of the vampire council, it was almost a myth to her, but she knew of their rules and one that was especially important: do not turn someone without their consent. the thought had never occurred to her that some people were just ruthless like that, to strip someone of their mortality for whatever reason without considering how the other would feel. although this thought is childish of her. seoyeon always assumed people never did things without ulterior motives, why wouldn’t that apply to any other species?

she wonders how bad the boy’s experiences had been and his face was definitely not an indicator that could help, a vampire’s looks are always so deceiving and she would never be able to pinpoint his true age without asking so she guesses a couple hundred. seoyeon can’t fathom what it must’ve been like to live through so many periods in time and what that could do to a person, she was only nineteen and she had only witnessed so many things. with life comes love and death, seoyeon had only seen few people die and she had never been in love, who knows how many times this boy has had his heart broken or seen others live out their days as he keeps his young face.

the idea of regret permeates her thinking, would she truly regret the life of a vampire? so much so that she’d want her own shitty life back? seoyeon would regret leaving behind her heritage and her powers, seoyeon would regret having to watch everyone else she knew move on with their lives. but what would she not regret? she would not regret escaping the pressures and expectations the witches held above her head, she would not regret finally gaining the freedom she wanted and she would not regret eventually forgetting the memories of her childhood and replacing them with new ones, better ones. as horrible as it sounded she had to admit the truth to herself, that she would rather erase the hurt that her family had put on her rather than face it.

“ i want to know how bad it is to be a vampire, the worst parts. ” seoyeon to not sound demanding. the question however was personal, if this was an overstep then this encounter could quickly go awry, but against all her better judgement she trusts the vampire not to hurt her.

introducing fey lines’ first meme! these prompts may be used either as drabbles or as thread starters, canon or alternate universe. to let members know that you’d like to receive asks in your inbox for this meme, please reblog this post. and remember “rp karma”; the more memes you send out to your fellow members, the more you’re likely to receive!

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SEND ME A FLOWER AND MY MUSE WILL…

ALSTROEMERIA …pay your muse for something.

ASTER …ask your muse for advice.

ANEMONE …abandon your muse.

ANTHURIUM …offer your muse a place to stay.

BASIL …insult your muse.

CARNATION …reject your muse.

CHRYSANTHEMUM …confess to your muse.

DAFFODIL …forgive your muse.

DAHLIA …congratulate your muse.

DAISY …tell your muse a secret.

DELPHINIUM …tell your muse a joke.

FREESIA …smell your muse.

GARDENIA …smile at your muse.

GERBERA …ask for your muse’s trust.

GLADIOLUS …make your muse a promise.

GOLDENROD …give your muse encouragement.

HEATHER …protect your muse.

HYACINTH …steal from your muse.

HYDRANGEA …thank your muse.

HYSSOP …sacrifice something for your muse.

IRIS …give your muse a compliment.

LARKSPUR …put your muse in their place.

LAVENDER …help your muse relax.

LILAC …give your muse a gift.

LILY …hurt your muse.

MORNING GLORY …give your muse a hug.

NASTURTIUM …compete with your muse.:

ORCHID …trap or capture your muse.

PEONY …accuse your muse.

PROTEA …dare your muse to do something.

RANUNCULUS …flirt with your muse.

ROSE …give your muse a kiss.

SNAPDRAGON …lie to your muse.

STATICE …console your muse.

STOCK …hold your muse’s hand.

SUNFLOWER …help your muse.

TANSY …start a fight with your muse.

TULIP …recognize your muse.

[ ... ]

“Two years ago, if someone had told me they were from a family of witches, I would have given them contact information for a psychiatrist,” Harin admits. In retrospect, he can see how blind he’d been, how stupidly naïve, but the thing is … “If I’m being honest, I still don’t really understand … a lot of things. I’m trying to learn. Uh, just let me ask a lot of questions, if that’s alright.” 

It’s just that as he understands it, that ignorance would be all the more painful to Seoyeon’s family if they’re witnesses to it, so she gets to benefit too. Harin cocks his head to the side, and watches to see if she can make the connection.

she can’t lie, the atmosphere of the little cafe calms her, it’s not her regular scene but the overwhelming scent of coffee provides some kind of comfort for her in a strange way. if she were  to put a finger on it, it would probably be the fact that the smell is incredibly familiar and brings her a sense of warmth that she wasn’t used to.

“ no no, i’m fine with my caffeine, sometimes it’s more effective! ” she jokes.

his words leave her with a unusual feeling. i guess you’re not going to believe that some people are just really selfless sometimes? it plays around in her head like some kind of stupid jingle and for some reason she can’t shake it. seoyeon tries to think of times where people have been selfless to her, or her them, and she can’t recall any big acts of “selflessness” that extended past a simple favour. perhaps she’s thinking to big and that those things should be enough, but it’s not. not for her. even with that seoyeon’s not entirely sure she could extend herself that much for someone else, so maybe it’s best she keep the idea that no ones’ ever truly selfless in her head. 

her train of thought keeps her so occupied, she doesn’t even notice when harin starts talking again and quickly organises herself to tune into her companion, not wanting her blank eyes to be thought of as bored.

[ ... ]

and he’s not going to address the fact that he nearly jumps out of his skin when she does speak to him. minki tries not to groan. instead, he forces on his polite little customer service smile and turns to her. “yes? did you need help finding a particular book? we only cater to used books so if it’s something more recent, i’m afraid we may not be able to help you.”

she tried not to chuckle upon seeing minki’s reaction to her intrusion. he didn’t really look like the type of person who could communicate with spirits, although really what was she expecting? it’s like any other witch she knew, none of them looked as though they could do things beyond the what a human could possibly be capable of. the word she was looking for: extraordinary.

seoyeon works in customer service too, albeit her’s was a little bit less formal and more putting up with drunks, so she recognised the almost too good to be true smile and peachy tone of voice he puts on for her. she reckons she’s disturbed his peace and quiet just from the aura surrounding him but technically it’s his job to serve her and she needed help so she can’t feel sorry about it.

“ no i’m in need of some... ” seoyeon keeps her voice low, almost down to a whisper,  “ witch help. ” she eyes the store yet again, just to ensure that no one could encroach on their conversation. 

she couldn’t lie, she felt a little childish whispering to him for help. she should be able to do this on her own, she shouldn’t have to be crawling to another witch to help her. what would her family think of her if they saw her unable to perform this magic without the slightest bit of help? although, they probably wouldn’t have batted an eye to it seeing as the man she was seeking was a wongyeong witch.

[ ... ]

he hopes he doesn’t regret answering that question, and that it won’t relate to some strange, harmful experiment on vampires the witch plans on conducting. his gut tells him otherwise though, and it rarely steers him wrong. he doesn’t know if she’s worthy of trust– he doesn’t know nearly enough about her to judge her character –but she’s worthy of humoring, at least. “i hope that answered your question well enough. is there anything else?”

she can’t keep her eyes off of him as he talks, in complete awe of the vampire in front of her. his face was so youthful, reminding her of the many boys she would meet in her high school days, yet his eyes looked like they carried so many stories. there were few eyes she had seen that had lived though decades ( centuries most likely for him ) she felt as though she could learn so much from them, yet there seemed to be something else hidden behind them. 

seoyeon’s wide eyes must’ve been scaring him, well not “scaring” seeing as he could probably kill her in one fell swoop but weirding him out at best. it’s not everyday you get someone interrupting you in a highly questionable situation and then interviewing you for reasons unexplained, but as she listens to him speak her wonder continues to grow.

she liked the words he was saying “different”, “sweet” but the one she liked the most was relief. relief, the word resonated with her in some way. she’d never really known relief, sure the parties she would escape to would help her forget the truth, feel as though she was free but she had never experienced true relief from such things. it was all she wanted ever since she was little, relief from the stress put on her as a witch, as a member of the hanu house, to be something greater than the ones before her. her mind began to search for all of the things weighing her down, her sister’s “eternal” power over her, her parents’ thoughts — or lack thereof  — about her, even the need to marry an equally strong witch to carry on the legacy of the fae. she knew she needed to feel relief, and if she was honest she would do anything to feel it, to be free from all the expectations and disappointments.

that’s when she forms her next question. seoyeon’s not entirely sure what it truly means to her but the idea that popped into her head was one that was so serious, she wasn’t sure if she was thinking straight but the idealised life of a vampire she had created just seemed so much easier and perhaps she could stave off thinking about the consequences.

[ ... ]

After a few minutes, he’s returning with two drinks in his hands. One, the aforementioned latte; the other, a second iced coffee, which he sets in front of Seoyeon next to the one she already has. “You don’t have to finish this,” he says as he takes a seat across from her. “Figured you might need it, though.” From the messages they’ve shared, he understands the basic situation, but he expects more details will have to be forthcoming. Maybe less pleasant ones? Depends on how deep the problem is, he supposes.

seoyeon has no idea what she’s supposed to start with. the extended story as to how she got here? that would be far too long, especially with her tendency to heatedly rant and harin didn’t deserve to hear that just yet. perhaps she should mention what she expects of him? that would make her sound demanding, this wasn’t a job interview. harin returns quickly, interrupting her train of thought with a second iced coffee placed before her. she smiles at him as a thank you.

“ its okay, if i had my way i’d slip a bit of vodka in it with the week i’ve been having but that would be day drinking. ” she chuckles.

from any other person’s perspective their meeting would be considered ridiculous, fake dating as if she was in high school again, but to her it was simply an important step in her mission of giving her parents the biggest “fuck you” she could. on first glance harin looks perfect for this, he was older than her, his stature provided him with an intimidating aura, and the cherry on top, he was a werewolf. just imagining the look on her parents’ faces as she brings home a man who was very obviously not another witch made her giddy.

“ as you know i want to spite my parents, ” the two had conversed briefly but seoyeon hadn’t told him the history behind the circumstances, “ they’ve basically never really cared about me yet still want to marry me off to uphold their traditions, in a way i’m also spiting the way of the witches so it’s a win-win! ”

she wonders what he thinks of he, he surely wouldn’t be here if he thought she was simply  overreacting but he must’ve had a few thoughts about her being so dead set on angering her family. 

[ ... ]

he listens, and soon, it’s just kijung and the witch girl alone in the alley. “yes,” kijung replies just as bluntly. “that’s pretty obvious.” he wonders if she’s ever seen one before. she looks young still– if he has a right to say such –so maybe not. he sighs lightly, because of course she has a question. sure, why not. he’s willing to make himself a zoo animal for the sake of enlightenment. “what is it?”

any normal person would have been running by now, for the fear of pissing off a vampire of was certainly a valid one if the childhood tales her grandmother used to read to her had any truth to them. however, seoyeon carried no fear, perhaps backed by the fact that this particular vampire looked about sixteen but it would’ve been silly for her to judge him based on his appearance.

she probably shouldn’t keep him waiting but she can’t help but take in his features. he looked just like any other boy – any other human – she could’ve seen on the street, save for the fangs she had been exposed to earlier. it did have her wondering just how many people she had passed in her lifetime had actually been vampires?

“ what does that feel like? ” her voice softens considerably, “ feeding, drinking blood. ” 

seoyeon doesn’t know why that’s the first question of the millions she had that had come out of her mouth. as a witch she feels she should use this experience to learn more about vampires, she once heard whispers of a vampire’s blood being important to certain spells but in this moment she could care less about spells or being a witch at all. the curiosity stemmed from somewhere different, somewhere deep in her conscious that she was rather wary of. the idea of the other species the fae’s magic had touched all those years ago had always intrigued her, particularly on her darker nights where she would dream of how they lived their lives as an escape from her less-than-satisfactory own. she couldn’t doubt the attraction she had felt to the vampiric way of life and how easy it seemed to just slip away into it.