Dyke who Likes (posts)

my cherios spelled out my exact address this morning but like what the gudge ever i gobbled those honey nut freaks up and licked the bowl too

it's crazy how once you notice how literally everything centres men all the time you will never be able to enjoy anything properly ever again

this show is about men this movie is about men this game is meant to be played as a man these characters are men so they're intrinsically more likeable than their bitchy women counterparts this show is about women but they're all for men to look at this movie is about a woman but there's a guy there as well to make it more palatable for General Audience (men) this fandom is all about this one man what do you mean you don't like men. what about this man you must like him!!! he's like a woman to me! and by that i mean i headcanon him as a trans man because im #queeringit and him being a trans man basically means Woman Lite right? so i basically do care about women! and going on e makes you like men and going on t makes you like men and being a lesbian means you still have to have a himbo man friend and you HAVE to read this book! it's about a man

Vaguely irate, faintly nauseous, and ambiguously uncomfortable in a way where you can function and act normal, even though you'd much rather be face down on the ground doing the worm while shrieking like a banshee in a rock tumbler.

Typical Monday in August

It started raining like a punctured bladder almost immediately after, to my instant relief. No idea what I'm going to do with this information since I don't control the weather, but I guess that's what helps sometimes.

I’ve ranted about this before, but if I hear one more person tell me as a disabled, chronically ill person that I “need reset my vagus nerve” and they suggest a magnesium bath soak and what is essentially chamomile tea mixed with a laxative to fix it, I refuse to be held responsible for my actions.

“Your vagus nerve has stopped working,” worstie, that’s called death.

the "we need this version of [x]" memes always have me in hysterics for some reason

When you get more objective about the way nature is & away from weird anthropomorphic carnivore slander it is a little funny when the baby sea turtles hatch and every other animal in like a ten mile radius goes "oh fuck yum one million mini sliders"

Watching a jaguar casually walk up to an adult sea turtle headed back to the water after laying her eggs and eat it like why am I in my sea turtle violence era and why are they like this. Adult sea turtles aren't especially easy to eat in the water they'll swim around with shark bites taken out of them like they're just chillin. And then on land they just kinda

Jaguar watching a sea turtle on the beach: oh fuck yum 100 pound slider

Also today I learned that since the jaguar scares off other smaller predators it's actually good for the sea turtle population if there are jaguars there. Cause less babies get eaten by Everything Else. I'm gonna be honest I didn't even consider that a jaguar could be on the beach

Every other animal in like a ten mile radius: I'm gonna be honest I didn't even consider that a jaguar could be on the beach

They call me bugs cause im bunny

I make her laugh cause im funny

I go on walks when its sunny

And stack it high cause I get money