Felix Puckerman

I like it cold, I can only sleep with it’s freezing. That depends, are you gonna haunt me if you die?

So do I but that's when I have my Spongebob blankets. I can't even feel my feet right now. Yes, I'm never gonna leave you alone. I'll haunt you every second of every day. 

Because I don't have any blankets. 

There is also something called bringing your own blankets from home.

There was only so much I could carry. I didn't think this place would be so cold. Are you gonna let me die? Can you live with that? 

I’ll be sure to write idiot on your tomb stone.

Don't be mean, You know, there's an easy solution to this. It's called cuddling.

Why didn’t you bring blankets, dude?

Because I'm dumb and I thought my instruments were more important. I was wrong. Guitars aren't very warm.

Are you sleeping outside? Should I call you, Hobo Felix?

I'm sleeping in my new place but I didn't bring any blankets with me and the bed sheets aren't doing a great job at keeping me warm. 

I didn’t want to take part in any stupid carnevals anyway.

I got you a corn dog if it makes you feel better. 

I never think about that, just the kissing, and other activities that lead from it. You want me to go to an event with a bunch of teenagers? Will there be alcohol?

It won't be french kissing, just a peck. There'll be lots of adults but I don't think there'll be alcohol. What do you need alcohol for?

Don’t open your mouth and stay sanitized.

And how does one stay sanitized?

Why did you volunteer if it makes you feel that way?

Because I wanted to help and I can't bake and this sounded fun at the time. 

Because it’s fun. I’m 26, man, I should be hanging around with people my age.

It's not fun. It's gross. Think about all the saliva and bacteria. You should be supporting charity... and me. I might give you a kiss for free if you come. 

Sounds like fun, I’d do it for free, have fun.

You'd smooch a bunch of strangers for free? What would be the point? You should come. It's for a good cause.