🌙✨

“still fuckin’ soaking wet, who dives into a lake and then doesn’t know how to swim? if you’re going camping and you knowingly get into the water, you should at LEAST know how to doggy paddle. it’s fine though, just wish i had a better towel.”

“-- wait, are you trying to say that YOU’RE the one who saved someone’s stupid ass, or are you the stupid ass ?? because, the way i see it, it could go either way.” 

“I need to go home, right now. My phone has been dead for like a day, I’m tired of eating s’mores and hotdogs, being eaten by bugs, and those bathrooms at the front of the campsite are horrid. Honestly, how the hell do you enjoy camping?”

“you get drunk off your ass and quit whining about things that don’t matter. we’ve got chips, and beer. TONS of beer. and i’m sure someone thought to pack bug spray, so that takes care of another problem. and if the bathrooms are that bad, pee in the woods. anything else you want to complain about ??”