Evolve or Die

I made coffee in a keureg and it was too weak. So I added a packet of instant coffee to it. Still a weak-ass cup of coffee. Either this really is a feeble cup, or recovery and crossfit and running are getting me stronger and coffee just can’t keep up. 

I’m terrified, grieving the “loss” of my disorder, struggling with body image like you wouldn’t believe... but I hit a new PR in my deadlift last night. Lifted 40 lbs more than I could do two weeks ago. I hate the idea that recovery will probably make my body heavier, but I’m not upset that my lifts are getting heavier. I am trading my disorder for a strong and capable body, an awake mind, and a vibrant soul. Someday that will feel like a good exchange. It doesn’t yet, but I hope it will.

When you visit someone in the psych unit, can you wear things with zippers/belts/drawstrings? Obviously patients can’t have those things, but will I be allowed in to visit if my clothes are wrong?