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Fine then. But as soon as that changes, let me know. I have absolutely no shame when it comes to my body.

I wouldn’t hold my breath for that if I were you.

Because I’m ridiculously hot? Unless I’m mistaken, girls like looking at ridiculously hot boys.

Yeah, I guess. But that doesn’t mean I want to see you naked!

Fine, fine. Nudity that’s not you works too. Would seeing me naked make it easier for you to let me see you naked? Because I’m totally willing to take my clothes off.

Great.  Oh my god, no!! Why would I ever want to see you naked!

It’s rude that you won’t let me see the performance I want to see for your own silly reasons. And rude that you won’t let me watch a show with nudity. Nudity is a totally natural part of human life.

I can show you a bootleg of the original Broadway cast performing Spring Awakening. I have no problem with nudity, I just have issue with letting you see me like that.

You’re rude. Does anyone get naked in Evita?

That wasn't even rude, I was just being honest. And, no. I wouldn't have suggested it, if it did.

Why not? It’s just a performance, right? Are you really going to deny someone the pleasure of watching you perform?

I definitely don’t mind mild nudity or simulated sex in the slightest. You wouldn’t happen to have a recording of that performance anywhere, would you?

So he was like an actual dude that got turned into a scarecrow? That fucking blows! He lost his humanity and his title like all in one day, but hey, what a player for getting both of the witches. Wicked sounds like the high school drama version of Wizard of Oz. They made a musical all about sex, with rock music? Now that I need to see. Is it good?

Yep, exactly. It’s even worse because the whole reason Elphaba had to turn him into a scarecrow was to save him while he was being tortured by the wizard’s guards. I guess it kind of is? Only it’s mostly in college and the second act is really just a different perspective of the events in the Wizard of Oz. They did! It’s amazing, I mean, if you don’t mind the mild nudity and simulated sex in the scene that takes place before and after the intermission. I starred in my school’s performance of it last semester and it was absolutely an invigorating experience!

Arjiki isn’t a real place, and I know that Wicked is like the prequel to Wizard of Oz, or at least I thought I knew that, so are you telling me that the scarecrow has a name and a freaking title, too? That’s awesome! What musical is the other name from?

Neither is Oz, you’re right it is the prequel. Fiyero was his name before he got turned into the scarecrow. He was also engaged to Glinda the good witch until he left her for Elphaba the Wicked Witch of the West. The other name is from Spring Awakening, which is a musical about the effects of discovering how confusing sexuality is during repressive late 19th century Germany, while set to alternative rock music that’s supposed to take place in a modern day “song world.”

Wow, those names are ridiculous. I kind of like Fiyero, though. Sounds like an Italian car.

 Hey! I love those names, they’re from two of my favorite musicals. Fiyero is the name of the Arjiki prince and scarecrow from Wicked. It’s not even slightly Italian.

One really cute kitten coming up. What would you name it?

Thank you. Well, it would depend on the gender but probably either Fiyero or Wendla.

There’s a musical about Tupac’s music? No way! And if I liked Green Day, that’d be cool too. That cat one seems a little crazily weird- what’s it called?

Yes there is, it’s called Holler if you hear me. it closed last July though and kind of got robbed  by Tony noms this morning. The cat musical is called Cats...

So that is something they do, then? Record the actual thing or just remake it into a movie? And are all musicals about like operas and phantoms or are there any about anything cool?

They do both and most times only occasionally. Like, RENT, Into the woods, and Phantom have both, but there are some musicals that only have one or neither. There are musicals about almost everything, there’s one about the Green Day’s american idiot, one set to the music of Tupac and even one about a bunch of cats awaiting reincarnation and those are just the first three off the top of my head

Oh. They make movies of those too, though, don’t they? I remember my sister talking about some movie about a haunted opera and she said she was watching it on DVD. Fine, then. Whatever. Dog or cat?

Occasionally. Phantom of the Opera has multiple versions of it on dvd though, the two most recent an actual movie and a recording of the 25th anniversary stage production. ...Um, I’m partial to cats.

So what kind of musical are you talking about then? I have like every movie ever made or a way to get one if I’m missing it so maybe you should show me what you mean one of these days. Regular sized pigs are cute too but you can buy the kind that are tiny forever! They’re totally real and totally adorable.

I mean Broadway musicals, the kind that take place on stage. Not movies. Teacup pigs are bad pets. I can’t remember the specifics but I know for sure I’ve seen articles on how it’s some for of animal cruelty on the part of the breeders.