Epi Strife

Dear Parents: I don’t want to call you...you’re baby’s on a ventilator.

Being a local field epidemiologist can be fun and exciting. At times it’s like the E.R. of public health - each day brings new challenges, new mysteries to solve and putting practices in place to ensure others safety. But at the end of the day, the hard fact that we try not to dwell on - because it would drive you to clinical depression - is that you or someone you love is ill, and we have to call you.

Sometimes the illness isn’t as bad. By the time we chat, you’re feeling better and we even get in a few laughs about the fact that we’re having a deep conversation about your diarrhea. But other times, the tough times, your baby is admitted to the hospital, is on a ventilator, and I have to call you...because it’s due to Pertussis.

“Pertussis (whooping cough) still exists?” “Measles still exist?” “Mumps still exists?” Yes, they still exist. We don’t see it in droves like we used to because we have a strong vaccination program in the United States.

I could show you the numbers. Give you the example of Japan and their epidemic when they stopped vaccinating against Pertussis. But I don’t need that. Every time I receive a Pertussis case, and it’s your baby just weeks old, and they’re on a ventilator struggling to breathe, and I have to call you to figure out what happened and ensure that the household gets antibiotics...I remember that it still exists. When I go home praying that your baby survives another day...I remember that it still exists.

And I ask if you have powerpoint capabilities...

And you say you do...

And I get there, and the laptop does not have a compatible outlet for the projector cable...

and it's a smallpox vaccine adverse event in a soldier

(I mean, they do get vaccinated for it before deployment, so an adverse event in military personnel is not unheard of. Serious, but not unheard of.)

and they are going to have a pow-wow about it

and not include you on it, but tell you their recommendations afterwards

Seriously? Because it's been so long since they've had to deal with a vaccinia adverse event? You know that local epi? The one who has the military base in their district? Yeah, pretty sure that local epi remembers how to respond since it's usually them that receives this call first.