gehblehh

reminder to self that even when ur a sad kid u got someone whos nice and calls you dear and darling and babe and makes filthy serial killer aus w u

im fucking terrible im the worst i just want people to feel bad for me and centre tehier whole lives around me and like??? no????? its not all about you??????? even when i try to help ppl i get annoyed when they dont want whatever wpecific brand of help i think they should like FUCK dude look outside your own damn head for a second!!

gnhhh what kinda timing is it that the ONE TIME i specifically have Emotions and Thoughts that are Sad and Complicated and Center On A Specific Relationship, and i actually decide i want to Talk about them! instead of letting them simmer infinitely!  that person seems rlly depressed (?) and not available ill just stop here its clear what a selfish sonuva gun i am making someones mental illness a personal inconvenience GOD and its not even the first time!  as soon as someone for any reason doesnt follow my internal scripts i get mad at them like its a choice in their hands at all jade you selfish BITCH i swear to GOD TRY HAVING SOME COMPASSION FOR THE PEOPLE YOU PURPORT TO CARE ABOUT FOR 5 SECONDS WHEN THEY ARENT SERVING SOME SO-CALLED “”””NARRATIVE PURPOSE”””” THEYRE FULLY REALISED BEINGS EITH THOUGHTS AND FEELINGS AND LIVES OUTSIDE OF YOU SO JUST SHUT THE FUCK UP ABOUT HOW WARD YOU’RE FINDING THIS AND TRY TO DO SOMETHING USEFUL FOR FUCKING ONCE i cant believe how gross the start of this post sounds GAH i like to pat myself on the back for being “”caring”” and “”consideate”” but when it comes down to it thats just how i like people to see me and im a pretty good faker

lol that relatable feel when u want 2 jump into a wood-chipper AMIRITE