Endah Nursalehah

Salah satu temen nanya caranya ikhlas dan maapkeun karena jika aku tahu gimana caranya, mungkin terlebih dahulu bakal nge-assist si Endah biar lebih ikhlas ngejalanin hari-harinya.

I really dunno know how, but one thing, I really need a sincere repentance to get into tranquility, a peace of mind.

Penerimaan diri buat di asses, dosa yang mana Ndah yang jadi sumber dan kudu segera di tutup? Keterbukaan dengan diri sendiri buat ngaku, ini pun engga mudah..

On a death bed, he wished we were there.

I don’t know how to face this April. Shall I sit still and pretend that things are perfectly fine just the way it is? On the flip side, I can’t shut up something inside of me asking how if scenarios. Will it be my last April and my last Ramadhan? How could you be prepared  and make things out of it?

Ólafur Arnalds - A Sunrise Session with JFDR (some kind of peace)

I feel acceptance on their shortness of the warmth at winter solstice. During the sun rising, they appreciate of the lights that's finally started to kiss their skin, also they kept reminding themselves it’s temporary because the sun will eventually rotating to another side of the skies.

Whiplash Bar Scene - "Good job."

This conflicting in me. 

Oftentimes I’m wondering why I keep coming back for something despite a better alternative option I have. Does the place, people, food or stuff has a bigger number than 9.81? 

And for tomorrow, I choose to keep sail away and believe in me for every decision I make.

엔다, 난 믿죠.

Pictures from Infinity Loop game lv 66

Emotions are inconsistent, volatile, rich, strong, fleeting and might be changed in a flick of a switch. It’s pretty interesting how she managed herself and choose not to make a move about his feeling on her. People might hold a judgement on her that she is just afraid of making a commitment because she too afraid of missing something better. Mmm I think she validate him by tried to rationalized his feeling based on his behavior and making a room for him to reflect and rethink about his (maybe) just-in-time emotion. 

 What mark you will leave on this 2020, En?

Tracing and backtracking I found out most of my time spent on spiraling on negative self-talk, impacting how I function day by day. I might be able to maintain a solid ritual of praying, Alhamdulillah, with all His affection & mercy. But on the productive side of me, I guess this year is another pitfall. Watching the clock ticking, I ended up observing how miserable it is to lose another bet, missed too much train, while my world keeps shrinking. My muscle has been over-trained to get up again and again, yet it feels a great burden and guilt to take a rest. I guess the keywords are trapped, coked up, spiraling, and blurry. 

En 2020 Manifesto

Mindful  Having intention upon your action. Tone down things to take care of

Grateful Better prayers, be aware of His blessings

Discipline Faidza azzamta fatawakkal allallah

Fun Live the life!

I’m considering to add 

Hot and cold of October skies.