averi the fartlord

fings arw looking so up <3 <3nevur kill yourself

mood board of the last week or so

in addition to that u know the feeling when you eat a sugary thing before bed and u can tell it's the root of your brain going on this overactive and strange spiral? i've been having that sensation drift into wakefulness- sweets have been making my mouth sort of burn wuth it's sugar and especially artificial flavorings, something that occasionally pops up in a handful of candies and other products, but in the way where it feels like especially palpable and extenuated by this psychological circumstance. It means something it's intentional and border on this artificial trigger. I feel myself sort of spamming them at my job to be willed back into dipping my toes into this mindset for whatever which reason of somehow resonating with its themes and coaxing anything to make time glaze faster. some sort of pull at an elusive dark bubbling under the surface speaking to a greater Theme. I have a glimpse of and somewhat can say what it's speaking to, but because of the way it's manifested, it hints to another picture that's hiding itself or being obscured. I think it's something i want to research further and could be interesting ground for a project or like just my own weird spoils from introspection. but it's been lingering after i go home and like pervading the room especially before i do go bed where nothing has been able to fully break me out of feeling this underlying consequence of a heavy coat of being a bit Scared.

i guess i can also just post pictures of the outfit it was warm as fuck in there

layers of outfit i wore to historic leather bar’s critter night and first layer of fit for pool party i got snubbed on cuz i didn’t buy ticket on time and then i guess i probably would have recycled for this other event last weekend i had to skip on and another pool party this upcoming weekend i have to skip on because i have work💔and can't afford a ticket tbh so like it's fine..

ummm i dunno like i feel aside being very catered towards masculinity i'm fairly open to the world- but i for sure have a soft spot for the sort of same-sex yaoi sexual dimorphism things so guys who are notably bigger than me in any most regards i must say i am a fan of LOL ٩( 'ω' )و bonus points if crossovers into any of subcultures/niche communities i am a part of like especially furry and such so i thinks, like the animal thing in very core to me and my self identity and expression so i would wanna be with somebody who harmonizes with that in some sorta way. like goes a step above just humoring me, like theres someone sort of understanding or openness or relateability there. or humors me WELLLLLL. LOL . but i dunno, i like having a lot in common with somebody so differences feel very novel. like- in a very gimmicky way with the yaoi dimorphism, WHICH is why it only works in homosexual scenarios, its novel you both are the same thing but that same thing can look so different- but when straight ppl do it it's like oh ur different species...wtf do you even have in common with one another this is just purely perverted and gross(though always a few exemptions). Or like on personal grounds differences that are fun to explore. I like having similar ways of approaching the world, similarly shaped magnifying glasses and stethoscopes and enjoying talking about our discoveries and how they may differ and also lalala having being be silly and fun. opposed to like LARGE gaps in personality or world approach or whole life factors overall. like thats a huuuuuuge turn off and why i mainly look in subculture environments when trying to foster new friendships or connections since that base level will be typically hypothetically already a little bit off the ground.

ok getting excited about this dawg man......:3 excuse the roommates watching obsession in the bg sounds lol

theres this weird dog in my room lately...

figuring out new plain generic-core truesona teype fursona shieeeet.... very very light blonde red fox ^__^ maybe a splash of coyote hybrid in there still