the graveyard shift

There's a weird 3 star movie out there ready to change your life forever

You have to careful about masturbating to your imagination cause god doesn’t know about imagination so he will assume you are jacking off to whatever is around you like dust, a dead bug, birds nest. And if you jerk off to a poisonous bug (or if god assumes you have) then you do go to hell

IT’S BACK

ITS BACK 

This is one of those posts that you need to save and tag or you’ll never see it again for 84 years.

it’s from 2013 with 2.4mil tags how the fuck have i not seen it before?!?!?

Portals to hell? I haven’t heard that name in years

crazy how there are only 2 hours of doing things every day before you keel over and die. if this werent normal id be worried

You all have no idea how consoling I find the fact that Moby Dick exists

Tbh I need to take more advice from classic lit and just say fuck it

Being a calm, gentle, non-reactive person is really hard work, which is probably why many people are none of these things. Personally I think it’s worth it but sometimes one does want to just roll around on the floor wailing at the top of one’s lungs