How am I still alive

If your post reaches 10.000 notes you should gain the ability to pin a comment so people don't ask the same stupid question over and over again. You should also be allowed to explode one guy

remember when larian put all the data together from the most popular character creator picks in bg3. and they thought there was a mistake, so they ran the numbers again, and no - the result was just authentically, in a world where you can be pink, and have glowing eyes, and horns, and a tail, the result was the most generic looking human white guy with brown hair

"it's always baldest before the gate"

i love when he said it's balding time and just balded all over

If Rock N Roll came out today they would call it Woke N Roll and it would be woke

its bait

I’m saying that my post about woke n roll is bait and doesn’t mean anything its just nonsense I posted in order to generate social media engagement

hey can I reblog this post

Only if you want to be cancelled by the toxic Woke N Roll fandom

What a year this week has been.

It’s Monday.

It sure as hell is.

The earlier in the day Monday you reblog the funnier this gets

The funniest is if you reblog this on a Monday that is also January the 1st.

how fucked up would the spell "liquify calcium" be. honestly

If I reduce the gravity of the bones then it turns into a gas and I. Want a liquid godamnit. Also gravity is a funky thing and I feel like that's a lot of responsibility for me to have compared to "raise temperature by a lot"

one sec my mom's a mortician

is anybody gonna question the "I killed my landlord"

yeah, how? mine just upped rent.

I hate it when your parents are like “I know you better than you know yourself!” Like no you don’t

Like oh, you’re an expert on the inner machinations of my psyche? Name three of my top ten existential dreads

“But I raised you!” Ya and the only version of me that you know is the one I carefully crafted so that you wouldn’t ask me questions because it became obvious early on you couldn’t handle the honest answers

i hit reblog SO FAST

so..very…loud…but also true

What is my favorite color