Crack baby, you don't know what you want
But you know that you had it once
And you know that you want it back

blake kathryn
occasionally subtle

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Three Goblin Art

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if i look back, i am lost
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@dryrotdecay
Crack baby, you don't know what you want
But you know that you had it once
And you know that you want it back

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Client told me to not post the whole comm but I got permission to post this small bit
Lawrence Oleander / Lich IMG PACK
consider this a mood board or whatever. -L
He feels insecure about his acne :(
You're not alone anymore.

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2026 update
non-existent volume huh
a boy and his mother
a winter sketch
Happy holidays everybody!
Why would Ren become the Fox character we all know and love in TPOF?
Ngl, when I first learned The Announcer was Ren, I thought it was a terrible decision; one that was driven solely through pandering and fan service. The Announcer first made an appearance in one of EP's games, and as others have pointed out, it was likely he wasn't intended to be Ren until TPOF was in the works.
I kept reasoning that Ren had a sadistic streak, sure, but having him become a torture streamer like Strade just stretched the bounds of believability. Ren could never. He was too sweet. Too nice. Too much of a crybaby. He cries over absolutely everything in BTD2! He cries tears of joy when MC wants to hang out with him! You're telling me he's capable of running a whole ass human trafficking organization and snuff stream?!
That was until I took a closer look at Ren's actions in BTD1 and BTD2. I realize it fits a lot better than I initially believed.
In TPOF, I was pretty surprised at how... 'gentle' he was with MC. Sure, getting an eyeball gouged out and then getting a facial is pretty gnarly. Literal insult to injury. However, throughout the entire show, he coaches us and reassures us in a way that proves causing pain isn't his primary goal.
He tells us what to do. He gives us instructions for how to survive the chat. He gives MC painkillers for the third show. All these things would only hurt his performance. He didn't need to do any of that, yet he decided to in order to help us in whatever small ways he can. Compare this to how he acts in BTD1. He'll give MC some water and help us pull the nails out of our legs (even though that would probably make things worse in the long run, it's the thought that counts). He won't outright free us or help us escape, but he'll do what he can to make our captivity just a little more bearable.
In BTD2, he's the most reasonable of the boys and 21 out of his 27 endings result in MC surviving. Hell, there's not one, but two endings where you can convince him to just let you go! However, there is one snag: Lawrence.
He and Lawrence had been chatting with each other for an unspecified amount of time, and yet Ren is still willing to have Lawrence die brutally just because it's what Strade would have done. Imo, this is the worst thing anyone in the BTD series has done to another character. Yes, Strade, Lawrence, Celia, Derek, Mason, etc. also torture and kill people, but at least we don't see them break their victims' hearts as well.
The fact Ren is willing to turn on him so easily tells me he either never liked Lawrence that much and chose to manipulate him from the start, or he did like Lawrence, but he was willing to throw all that away to accomplish his true goal. Either case is equally gross, as far as I'm concerned.
This also brings some doubt as to what happened to Strade between BTD1 and 2. Was it really the case that Strade was killed by another captive? Ren tells us so, but he lies constantly. He lies about it being his house. He lies to Lawrence about his true intentions. In every instance, he's not above lying to anyone about anything.
We get a peek of what might have happened in the 'You led him to bloody freedom' ending in YKMET. Here, he not only kills Strade but also MC as well. Throughout the whole time he's blaming MC for what happened. He's spiraling about his uncertain future. When it becomes too much for him, he snaps and kills MC. I think this ending gives us a good idea of how he could become Fox. Not only is he unwilling to face what actually happened with Strade's death, but he also shows his ruthlessness and ability to turn on others at a moment's notice. It also shows his greatest weakness: cowardice.
Ren isn't a coward for refusing to fight Strade. I think anyone would hesitate to fight a prolific serial killer and snuff streamer. Nor is he a coward for his reluctance in approaching normal relationships. He's a coward because he refuses to even imagine a life without Strade. In the YKMET endings where Strade is tied up and MC is escaping, he has nothing holding him there. Yet he still sides with Strade! Even with Strade gone, he still can't escape his influence and listens to him from beyond the grave in BTD2.
All in all, I guess I was resisting Ren becoming Fox because the idea of it made me profoundly sad. This is a man who has spent two and a half decades living with Strade in his brain, and he has absolutely nothing to show for it.
"Whaddya mean?! He's got wealth! He's got a following! He's got respect!" He. Is. Living. In. Hell. Consider this: the closeness and emotional intimacy he craves is non existent. He needs it so bad, that he's willing to show up shirtless in MC's cell just to have a heart-to-heart about the abuse they both suffered. Gato drew an image of him 'enjoying' his free time, and what does it look like? He's sipping coffee by himself while watching old episodes of Inuyasha.
Now, don't get me wrong. There's nothing bad about sipping coffee by yourself while watching Inuyasha (Lord knows I've done it enough times), but this is all his wealth and fame could buy him. No companions. No friends. Just the exact same situation he was in before he met Strade.
Ren becoming Fox is depressing to me for a multitude of reasons, most of which because of the lessons they remind us of:
Victims can become abusers
Even someone who seems innocent can do horrible things under the right circumstances
Just because someone has been through trauma doesn't mean they won't put others through that same trauma
For some, exacting pain on others is easier to deal with than the pain of introspection.
-LiL âĸī¸
.

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peekaboo :âī¸]
A going to be buried alive

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