Splendid Palimpsest

i have edibles and the strain promises a "chill" high so on the back there's an asterisk that says "chill has not been evaluated by the FDA" and i think it's only funny because they're not trying to be cutsey. it's in really small print in the middle of all the other warnings.

Coca Cola flavored Oreos taste like if you could eat clipart

I think they add an important element of randomness to the environment. My father in law bought 6 or 7 boxes of the Selena Gomez Oreos so he could set a Selena Gomez Oreo alarm to go off mid workday and then say to his coworkers, "Oh, my Selena Gomez Oreo alarm is going off!" and unearth from his locker his 6 or 7 boxes of Selena Gomez Oreos so he and his coworkers could distribute them around the neonatal ICU ward where they work. He said it livened up an otherwise extremely dreary day.

i wanted pickle juice really bad so i bought one of those gigantic dill pickles in those single-serve bags. just one huge pickle in there you know the ones. but i didn't want the pickle. so i just put a very small hole in the bag and sucked all the juice out. left the pickle in there of course. it's like the opposite of a wet specimen. somehow it's like a corpse in there.

What the fuck does the back end of this website look like

Say you'll stay with me blogging until the horse poll closes

This is stupid! Were you born yesterday? (the mayfly’s big limpid eyes fill with tears as it looks at me) oh god I’m so sorry oh no oh god

Update from checking the wikipedia alt text (now added here): they're sisters too btw

This is why I give money to wikipedia. No other company is willing to host age gap siscon of its subsidiary organizations.

at the library waiting to be picked up like it's 2001 or something.

i'm sorry i meant like picked up in a car. by my friend. because i don't have my bike today. i'm not cruising at the library. and if i were i would not have time to post about it. my methods are infallible.

"Love/sex is what makes us human" Wrong. It's the obsession with rectangles. look around you and count the number of rectangles you see.

its crazy how pretty much every single thing you can possibly do eithetr feels bad at first and then good or good at first but then bad

#OH YOU KNOW