doobs with scoob

good news. the things that used to upset me no longer upset me. bad news. i'm creating an army of bugs to hurt innocent bystanders

Item: Pigeon Shoes; a cheaper version of Flying Shoes that occasionally get distracted by bread crumbs

Ragebaiting my fat dog? More like master baiting my fat hog!!!!!!!!

me when im so sweet and beautiful monday

asked one of my coworkers how she's doing today and she goes "could be better, could be worse," and another coworker nearby who was eavesdropping chimes in with "could be a lil bit o' alligator curse!" i have no idea what he meant by that but i do know that it has been immediately added to the lexicon.

you spill dr pepper on the concrete and a single perfect rose pushes up out of a crack

this and a blunt

give me booboo wheel... i must have booboo wheel i simply must!