Everybody Lies...

Just want to feel appreciated

and its just been hard to accept that we didnt work out. I was so focused on what could be rather than what was. I wanted more than you ever had intentions of offering. Now I know I can't blame anyone but myself. You didn't lead me on. I lead myself to believe that we were so much more.

I think of you and I forget to breathe. I miss you so much it hurts my heart. I miss your touch. The way you pulled me in closer to you. When you kissed my neck and grabbed my thighs. Touched me, making me weak. When I'd try to kiss you but you pulled my hair back only to kiss my neck some more. All these feeling rush back to me everyday. I miss you, I miss everything had. I want it all back.

It's when the one person that kept you sane is no longer around that you realize you need him more than anything else.

My ex has been cheating on his girlfriend with me. She was also his ex when we were dating. This has been going on for 3 years.

I don't want to want you. I don't want to miss you. I don't want to need you and I don't want to cry for you. But everyday every single part of me wants you, misses you, needs you, and cries for you. I don't know how to shake those feelings. They follow me everywhere. They're like a cloud glooming over me. I feel like I'm carrying 300 pound weights of feelings. I want to forget you. I need to know that I'm okay without you.

I didn't go to prom because you were the only one I pictured myself with.

I just want to have incredible sex with you again.

I know I can be annoying and clingy but I just feel like I need to tell you when I miss you and lately I've been holding off. I miss you a lot. I miss you every night. I think of you every day. I don't know why I do. I guess I just wish you had stayed. Sometimes I wish you would just acknowledge me. Ask me how I'm doing. Tell me how you're doing. Even if you tell me how happy you are. I just need to know that you remember what we had and that I was a part of your life.

I just want a chance to fuck you. Maybe this time you'll stay.

I'm hurt and no one really understands. No one really cares. I'm okay. Really. I'm fine.