Too Disgruntled for Names

I've seen some posts trying to make fun of former gifted kids by comparing them to former student athletes who insist that they could have gone pro if not for a specific injury, and those posts always backfire, because my reaction to them is "You're right, we should treat former student athletes with more compassion than we currently do"

I went from being very physically active to getting the "your body doesn't make energy properly anymore" disability so I can completely understand the grief that comes with circumstances outside your control destroying parts of you you were once proud of and locking you out of the life you could have had. It's not a good feeling.

we’re so lucky that gilgamesh survived and is a banger. can you imagine if we found the oldest written human story ever recorded and it sucked balls.

"The [1728] essay Peri Bathous was a protracted dunk on contemporary poets the author didn't like ... The essay is very incomprehensible to a modern reader because none of the poets getting dunked on are remembered nowadays on account of how they sucked..."

maid engineered in a lab to sweep without a broom

the phrase "fujoshi ramona flowers" entered my brain suddenly and i cant stop laughing at it

I think it would be fun to go full out with “1001 Arabian Nights” orientalized fictional New York setting. It’s somehow always the 20s, and 80s and also contemporary. There’s depression era gangsters and Wall Street finance bros. Spider-man or the Teen Aged Mutant Ninja Turtles might show up. The Mayor is never named but is a constantly felt presence. Sometimes the World Trade Centres are there, sometimes they’re not.

Batman the animated series

hmm in retrospect maybe Noelle’s recollection of an incident where she saw Susie physically threaten Kris, in which she made unsubtle references to a desire to be the one being threatened with violence, should have been a clue that there was something going on with her (and that something was a bit deeper than “Noelle is a stupid idiot lesbian whose stupid idiot lesbian infatuation is making her a bad friend”)

when i was a kid i had moments of being so fucking diabolical because i realized at some point the best way to leverage power over my family was to do shit that would make everybody late

5th grade was the last time I wore a dress for school pictures. When my parents attempted to force the issue for 6th grade, I climbed onto our roof and pulled the ladder up after me. My dad borrowed the neighbors ladder. As soon as it touched the roof I pulled it up too. By the time I had 3 ladders they were willing to negotiate, and 2 hours late for work.

[Image ID: a tumblr tag reading "problems that can be avoided if you simply treat your child as a human being with the right to make decisions on what they wear". End ID]

why do US patriots think they own "red white and blue" there's a lotta red white and blue flags out there. "i stand for the red white and blue" yass me too let's go costa rica 🇨🇷🇨🇷🇨🇷🇨🇷 let's go laos 🇱🇦🇱🇦🇱🇦🇱🇦 fuck it up liberia 🇱🇷🇱🇷🇱🇷 nepal get triangular with it 🇳🇵🇳🇵🇳🇵

stitch incoming

so fucking stupid that shaving doesn't make the hair stop growing there. i told you to stop that