M0CK1NGB1RD

I need a blowjob but I don’t have a penis or a strap on and I’m not taking off my pants so you’re just gonna have to figure it out

i pull out my handgun and shoot myself in the head and the bullet flies cleanly through the hole that was already there from when i shot myself in the head last week

characters who get the "i can fix him" urge not because theyre a saint who loves everyone inherently but because they think "if i can prove there's good in everyone, maybe i can start feeling like i'm worthy or being seen as good too."

*penis starts throbbing* my arch nemesis is near…

dude shut up. i know how to cum i just dont feel like proving it alright

mood swings are hilarious because you’ll be like “everyone loves me for my neverending joy and whimsy i’m so happy and cheerful a—post cancelled turns out i want to kill myself”

you literally have to unironically listen to some shit like party rock anthem so you don’t kill yourself