It was the night of Heeseung’s homecoming game. football players spread across the field as the crowd roared, cheering for their respective university teams.

In all honesty, you didn’t know little to anything about football, let alone sports, flinching out every time the students that sat on the bleachers next to you would scream out in excitement or shoot up from their seats to clap and cheer.

The word “bored” doesn’t accurately convey how uninterested you were and how little you knew about college football. You didn’t feel much better not understanding a single event that had unfolded while sitting in the brisk fall air.

Your ears and fingers were nearly numb from the absence of sufficient warming layers on your body, and you were shivering in the denim jacket you had stolen from Heeseung’s closet.

As the game entered the fourth quarter, you were trembling with each gust of wind and fidgeting with the gem-layered pendant that rested against your chest.

It was obvious from the scoreboard, which you had to squint your eyes to see from the stands, that Heeseung’s team would win. The final score resulting, 38-14, caused students to stand up and shout in unbridled joy as the rest of the football team ran towards the field to celebrate their victory.

You still felt out of place despite being surrounded by so much school spirit, chanting, and screaming. In an effort to blend in with the crowd as much as possible, you sat as far away from the field as you could.

Watching Heeseung celebrate with his teammates, shouting out in excitement and playfully tackling them into hugs, his long arms slinging over players so effortlessly, you couldn’t help but smile to yourself.

You found it strange to hear other women gossiping and giggling about Heeseung, saying things that you would utterly concur with.

But the rumor that he was a sex god and was extremely strict about who he chose to hook up with was what you despised the most. How only the luckiest of pretty girls would he tempt back to his bedroom.

Even though you were hooking up with Heeseung and had plans to return to his apartment tonight to give him some, you resisted the urge to lean in and let everyone know because you knew that doing so would make you appear crazy.

Realizing this would make you a colossal hypocrite since you were the ones who caused the difficulties in your relationship with Heeseung.

Being overly protective of your own heart and unwilling to let the brown-eyed playboy with a long history of “sleeping around” have to close a relationship with you.

You managed to make out his trademark black hair, which is typically styled but was now pulled back over his eyes.

You also noticed his prince charming smile, the skin that peaked out from under his jersey, and the figure that shimmered from the sweat drips covering his entire body, making him look like a magazine model under the field lights.

His eyes scanned the sea of people until they finally met yours, sending a chill down your spine.

When he saw you so out of your element and knew you were doing it specifically for him, his Chester-like smile only got bigger.

He winked as he returned his focus to his coach, leaving you fiddling against the bitterly cold bleacher seats as well as the girls seated in front of you giggling as if the gesture was intended only for them to lean against each other in an out-of-control fit.

You reminded yourself that the only reason you had endured it all was because of the stupid deal Heeseung had made with you as your hands clenched against your thighs in frustration.

“How about we make a little bet YN, if i win this game you have to give me a special reward.”

Any bet you placed with Heeseung was akin to making a deal with the devil himself.

The winding game of cat and mouse with you resolutely giving in to his childish antics, beckoning your attention until you fall back into his trap with enough time to have you pressed against the cool tile of the guy’s locker room way after practice hours.

Fucking you stupid until you gain back that tiny sense of commitment-related fear by ignoring him entirely the next day.

Heeseung and you had been hooking up for long enough for him to understand that every time you pulled away, he would just snap back much harder despite your foul mood.

When you needed a quick reminder of how good he would make you feel or how well he already knew your body to turn you into a trembling mess unable to stand up by yourself, he was always there with open arms.

And each time you fall for it. The dick was simply too good to throw away entirely.

Because of this, you kept up your end of the bargain, swallowing the last of your pride, and stood in the parking lot’s darkness to observe how the other students filed through the gates along the curb.

Around the time Heeseung emerged from the locker room, the crowd had vanished quickly, going about their respective lives as they drove away in their cars.

Except for a few staff vehicles scattered about, the parking lot was deserted as you watched him approach closer while tossing his gym bag over his shoulder.

His phone initially caught his attention, not taking notice of you, swiping his thumb against the screen.

His head jerked up at the light ding notification from the phone in your pocket, and he followed it with his eyes, grinning to see you shivering by the curb for him.

He looked at your baggy outfit and lifted his brow, saying, “I’m going to be pretty disappointed if you aren’t wearing my gift under that.” He teases you by strolling past you with a yawn that seems uninterested, each long stride ending in the direction of his car as you simply followed his trail with a huff.

“Don’t fucking worry. I’ve been freezing my ass the entire game wearing this stupid thing.” Unbutton until the midsection of your torso to show a glimpse of the brightly colored cropped cheer uniform top you had tucked away under the fuzzy inside of his jacket, deciding there would be no harm in just giving him a peek.

The cut ending just under the curve of your ribs exposes the pudge of your stomach entirely. The uniform was very obviously designed for cookie-cutter, precisely shaped cheerleaders with pale skin, ponytails, and thin bodies who looked like they belonged in any stereotypical teen movie.

Heeseung almost drooled at the material you had to squeeze yourself into, clinging to every curve and crevice of your body.

You pulled the hem down, but it still didn’t cover much since you could see the skin of your torso next to the top’s strangely clashing colors.

Heeseung trapped you against the passenger side door, looming over you, and murmuring, “I think you’ve got to be the prettiest girl on the team YN.” He spoke in a deep voice that made it difficult for you to look him in the eye, your thighs threatening to squeeze together as his hands crept under the jacket around your hips.

“Yeah, yeah, I know I look exactly like your basic ass type. Can you hurry and just unlock your car before someone fucking sees us already?” The Heeseung was giving you all of his attention, but you were good at ignoring him to a point, pressing your palm flat against his muscular chest.

His fingers reached out to grab you by the jaw as he only leaned in closer, maintaining his smile the entire time. He did this to forcefully draw all of your attention to him.

“That’s not very school spirit of you, YN. Shouldn’t you be congratulating me on winning?” It was all an act to enrage you even more, but it was working due to the pout on his lips and the way he glared down at you.

You try to stop your heart from racing by pulling your face away from his hold and crossing your arms.

It appeared as though he had cornered you and was treating you like prey—just another bug that had gotten caught in his web. You could feel Heeseung’s words brushing against your skin as he hummed, “You know, you have such a fucking potty mouth,” sending a shiver up your spine.

His long fingers caressed your hips as he purposefully wedged his leg between yours. His light touch now extended under the jacket with both of his hands.

He pressed against you until you could feel the print of his erection against your stomach as your back rested against the car window. “I’ll forgive you if you show me the skirt.”

“Heeseung.” In a plea, you breathe out his name.

The last thing you wanted to do was to be caught flaunting some poor girl’s stolen uniform when you were already feeling self-conscious about only showing the top.

“YN.” He rolled his eyes and moved away, saying, “That’s too bad, I only give rides to pretty girls in skirts.” In a bored tone, he told you. His normally innocent smile had been replaced by an uninterested glare as he cocked his head.

He was practically swinging bait in your face, and you knew that the only thing he seemed to enjoy more than playing football was teasing you.

As a result, you became the first to play along with his scheme.

As you reached down and untied your sweatpants, shimming to pull them down to your thighs, a matching skirt set was revealed from beneath the gray cotton, his eyes never leaving yours until you broke eye contact first.

He breathed out at the view of your thighs crammed into the snug cuffed ends of the skirt’s safety shorts watching as his eyes take in the sight of your body.

You weren’t sure why you were acting so shocked when Heeseung chuckled and reached out to pinch the plush of your legs, but he quickly pulled back before he could become overly excited by touching you.

“Okay, you’ve persuaded both my dick and me. If you don’t want me to fuck you in the open parking lot, get in the car, slut."

The journey to wherever he was taking you seemed a lot worse to you. Your exposed thigh is being squeezed by his hand, which seems to be rising steadily.

If you knew he was going to tease you for the next twenty minutes, you would much rather have him fuck you in the parking lot. Not enough of the music blaring from the radio could help you calm down as you writhed at the growing need from beneath your skirt.

Even with the sun gone and the roads seeming like a maze at night, you could tell from the turns and exits which spot he had turned into.

His fingers danced across the precarious line of fingering you in his car or not while his eyes were fixed firmly on the road.

You even spread your legs wide to get the perfect angle for his hand, but he moved quickly to step back just far enough to deny you what you were pleading for.

What a fucking tease.

"You’re so fucking insufferable,” you grumbled, causing him to laugh heartily.

“Oh, shut the fuck up,” he quips. “You act like you’re not eating this shit up.”

“You think I like being dressed like this?”

“You agreed to it,” he reminded you, his hand laying a teasing smack against your thigh. “Just admit that you fantasize about being folded like some cheap slut in a porno. I won’t kink shame, angel."

"Don’t call me that,” you whined. “I’m not some fucking slut.”

“Well yeah duh,” he grinned side eyeing you only for a second. “But you’ll sound like one when I’m done with you.”

He backed into a more private space further into the deserted parking lot, engaged the car in park, and turned the radio volume down until it was barely audible over the sound of the late night.

He slapped his hands against the steering wheel, leaned back against his seat, let out an exasperated sigh, and then grinned impishly in your direction.

“The stars look just as pretty as you, YN.”

“Oh yeah, and how many girls do you usually say that to?” Rolling your eyes, you tried to contain the warmth that accompanied the sincere compliment.

“Only to the cheap sluts that I really want to fuck.” He responded dryly, watching with a gulp as his eyes glanced at your lips. “You’re driving me crazy, baby.” He finally snapped, leaning over the dash to kiss you, only being able to hold the whole arrogant persona for so long before he needed you as much as you needed him.

You couldn’t claim to have much prior experience having sex in a vehicle.

His room or yours would typically be where the two of you would spend time alone, but since your roommates were home and Heeseung’s fraternity was probably packed with people throwing a party in his honor, you had to make do with getting down in his car.

Holding yourself in place and pushing yourself closer so that you wouldn’t completely topple forward, all you had to do was twist and strain.

You could just tell from the low grunts and small sighs that Heeseung was getting a bit frustrated, his long limbs cramped into the small space. “Can’t you just sneak me into your place?”

“Oh yeah, you could just introduce yourself to my roommates while your balls are deep inside of me, maybe even shake my parent’s hand and tell them about your skirt kink too.”

“God, you’re such a fucking bitch.” Heeseung sighed, nipping at your bottom lip, “you’re lucky I’m into that.” Heeseung sighed, licking his lips before opening his door.

After he slammed the door shut, the overhead light flickered, and you puzzledly watched as he opened the back door rather than crawling into his seat before turning to you with an expectant look that beckoned you to join him.

You managed to crawl through the seats with a bit of a struggle, settling yourself against the other door as Heeseung guided your legs apart to make room to slot himself in. “Best gift ever,” he muttered as you changed into your full-fledged outfit, shedding the jacket and sweats that had covered you to the ground.

The moment that Heeseung had ducked under the hem of your skirt, your fingers tangled a handful of his hair in a fist, shivering at his eagerness, feeling his teeth tease against the skin of your thigh. Finally, paying much attention to the eagerness between them, his fingers probed and nudged against your clit until he had hooked your underwear to the side.

Your body responded before you could even process what was happening. His tongue teased at your clit, his fingers dipped between your folds, and the sound of your breathy groans spurred him on to move swiftly.

With your needy whimpers, fingers clamping down firmly in the nest of his hair, grinding against his fingers, and the sensation of your legs twitching and quivering, just the taste of you on his tongue was like unwrapping another reward.

However, you weren’t a fool.

You were aware of how pussy drunk Heeseung became each time he would eat you out, usually wanting to have you stumble out his name with tears threatening to prickle your eyes. When it came to going down on you, he was the type to lick the plate clean.

This is why you were taken aback when Heeseung suddenly stopped and raised the material on your skirt to look you in the eyes.

He continued to work his fingers in and out of you as if he weren’t attempting to carry on a conversation while teasing, “Be honest, you so have a skirt kink.”

As you attempted to comprehend the question, let alone provide a sarcastic response, your lashes fluttered and your head spun.

Any train of thought that tried to escape your mind as Heeseung’s fingers worked their magic “I-i’m.” is the only thing you could stutter out.

“I-I, you what baby?” His laughter made you squint your eyes shut, and you covered your face with your hands as he mocked you in a flat tone.

Heeseung leaned up and grabbed you by the wrist, pulling your hands away from your face to give you a more delicate kiss on the lips, muttering mostly to himself, “You’re so cute.”

Leaning into his touch, you suddenly felt his fingers pull away from you, making a humiliating wet sound that you ignored since Heeseung had already diverted his attention to another part of your body. He was fondling your breast through the crop top as his fingers explored.

You could tell from the way Heeseung smiled against your mouth that he was biting back on making some stupid joke the moment that his fingers made out the bud of your nipples.

As he pulls away, his other hand switches back to tracing the plush of your thighs before quickly removing your skirt.

He peeled it off of you without a bat of the eye, not wanting to struggle with the safety shorts that were sewn in under it like he had to do when he had blindly gone down on you.

Bumping his elbow and leg against leather seats as he sat up trying to strip his own shirt, a loud thump jortles you from your daze. Only then had you realized Heeseung’s hiss of pain.

His normally pale face was now flushed pink, and he scrunched his brow, rubbing the back of his head. “This is the thanks I get for having such a big dick.”

He leaned back down, perfectly squeezing himself between your spread legs, and asked, "Wanna kiss it better?” while getting dangerously close to your lips. He didn’t wait for a response simply because he could tell you were only glancing at his lips.

His head dove to hide in the crook of your neck with a grunt, as your fingers searched for the bulge that reacted with a twitch after you had grabbed him by the elastic of his shorts.

You didn’t hesitate, never did, knowing what you both wanted as his fingers spread your pussy apart.

You couldn’t help but feel intoxicated while listening to his shift in breathing as your hand guided his length to press against exactly where you wanted it.

Sharing a relieved gasp as he shifted his hips against yours, the feeling of him burying himself inside you completely, Heeseung was too lost in the bliss to joke about how good it felt to have you clench around him.

Your hips move in unison, seemingly motivated by a primal urge to pursue the intense arousing sensation that had been building up.

Heeseung, rubbing his thumb in circles against your clit while whimpering into your neck about how gorgeous you were.

As the intensity of his thrusts increased, steam built up on the car’s windows, and the air became humid as the car’s slight creak gave way to the weight shifting inside.

Few actual words were spoken because the two of you were too preoccupied with making each other feel good to even form sentences that had any proper finishes.

Heeseung readjusted himself, finding the spot that caused your muscles to tighten and spasm. Hooking your leg over his shoulder, nearly causing it to hit the ceiling as he grunted at you while clenching around you continuing his pace until your orgasm unfurled.

Despite being athletic, Heeseung went completely slack, falling with his entire weight against your chest, panting as if he were in practice running a mile.

He found calm in the thump of his heartbeat against your chest. “Hey, so about the roommate thing,” Heeseung spoke after he had eventually caught his breath, cuddling against your chest as his fingers played with your pendant. “I wouldn’t mind meeting them, or your parents, or telling anyone honestly; I just would prefer to do it fully clothed if that’s okay.”

You blinked. “You mean you want this to be like an official thing?” you asked, finally working up enough energy to sit up against the side of the door.

Wincing at the uncomfortable feeling of your sweaty bare skin dragging against the leather material of the seats. “Like this, you no longer refer to me as a slut but as your girlfriend instead.”

To say you rushed was an understatement as you found yourself immediately lined up at the place, you were struggling to stop your excitement as you clenched your wallet with your eyes slowly tracing the menu like you were about to make sweet love to it.

You hadn’t held back when you were called, all those foods you missed out for since you were 8 had been ticking away at your sanity thus you picked almost everything on the menu, from new items to old and from the meals to the desserts. You remember the pricing, it wouldn’t even dent your wallet, thus you handed over your cash with the largest smile on your face.

Eating all of it was something you had no problem in, however, what you didn’t expect was some of your classmates being there. “[L/N]!” You raised a brow at this before straightening up and trying to hide all the food you had gotten, failure to do so could result in your family finding out about your break from their extreme diet thus docking your allowance, you had no real time either before you were met by Haibara Yu and Nanami Kento. 

You remember them from your class since your elders held you in such a disappointed regard in being a Grade 2 Sorcerer. You buried your head in shame once you were selected by Jujutsu High and became a Grade 2 sorcerer, your elders wanted you to be better thus working you to the bone was the only way you had any chance of appeasing them, there was something you enjoyed that came out of this, however. 

Since you moved out into the on-campus dorms and your elders had the money you were given a very extensive allowance thus resulted in you keeping a lot of that money to the food you found brought you joy. You were scared that these two might tell someone else about your eating habits. “Wow! That’s a lot of food, [L/N]!” The brunette chirped whilst the blond just nodded before they took a seat with you, you didn’t know what to say before Kento spoke up. 

“You usually don’t eat like this on campus.” Yu nodded eagerly at that, “Exactly! You always have those intricate lunches with all those smart foods, y’know?” You found yourself wondering about what to say, yet you definitely found yourself a peeved by such a call out on your eating habits. “I just don’t get to eat like this thanks to the elders.” Yu raised a brow before Kento nodded, “The [L/N] Clan, right? They care much for appearance.” You groaned in response to this, “Yeah. Ever since I had to become a Jujutsu Sorcerer I got stuck on this strict diet.”

You remembered the bright and blurry years of your youth, short lived since you were snatched up to be prepped to become a jujutsu sorcerer, however, there was always something to keep you and the boy in a normalcy was the act opening up your lunch box to see what was held inside. You found yourself overjoyed by the lunch, no matter how simplistic or how childish, every dish you ate was one you ate earnestly with love in every bite and appreciation at every taste.

“Well,” Yu looked over at you, a large smile that creased his eyes to closure, “You don’t need to worry about us! This’ll be our secret.” The young man then pretends to zip his lips whilst his friend did the same, you jokingly joined in before questioning their whereabouts, “Where are you guys heading off to anyways?” Yu eagerly shouted about the plans, amped and excited whilst Kento was one to feel very different by such call, “It truly isn’t a fit mission if two strongest can’t handle it.” You agreed with such.

“And first years at that, I mean, we’ve just started and to give us such missions seems a bit dehumanizing like lambs to the slaughter.” You found that your life lacked any sort of simplicity, you craved the structure that you once had before the elders in your family forced you to become a Jujutsu Sorcerer, you were so young and being torn through by those higher than you that would call for your small head on a chopping block if you decided to stay with your closed loved ones in the beauty that was a life fit for your childhood.

You were bitter by the reality.

Yu was a bit conflicted on your thinking, nonetheless, he found positives in it. “It doesn’t have to be dehumanizing.” You raised a brow whilst you continued to eat your food, you held an open year as you listened earnestly to your classmate, “We’re doing things to help society that only we can do. Isn't that what matters most? Helping those weaker than us.” You found yourself seeing the light in Yu’s words, you held his words dear as they had similarity to those who you held in high regard, you still disagreed, however. 

“Depending on children to help the weak means the weak are helping the weak.” You explained, you tied your leftovers up for later and collected the trash you were about to throw away, “If we were actually helping the weak then the higher ups would take on more missions than the children that they’re throwing into the warfare for the fact they can’t control their abilities.” Kento listened to you, the release of his eyebrows to allow them to find care in your words whilst you continued on, “You’re either killed for not wanting to be a sorcerer or you’re killed for being a sorcerer.” 

You found your heart hurt by such memories of your childhood, the feeling of someone so bright was one unfamiliar to you and Kento seemed like the only other one who understood that “There is nothing more heartless than asking a child do you want to know how you’re going to die, or do you want to know when you’re going to do die?”

Yu watched your expression with all attention on your eyes, they were dull when talking about the reality of being a part of something so barbaric as described by you, “Even if I’m only here because of my ability, I am glad to help those who don’t have the ability as I do, and even if I am too young to know really know the severity of it all. It will all have been for the betterment of it all.” You found your eyes soften at such, it was the first time they had done that other than when you took a bite of food, “We are still too young for this mission.” 

You and Yu’s attention was toward the blond before the brown-haired boy cheered, “Our upperclassmen are wearing themselves out for a young girl! We have to give it our all, Kento!” You couldn’t but notice the unwavering light that was Haibara Yu, unchanging and consistently keeping the true beauty of this world regardless of all the bleakness that had tainted yours, you admired it. 

You put the bag on your arm with it sliding down to your elbow, you thought for a moment then some before Kento acknowledged your position, “You nodded at this before getting ready to leave, “Well it was seeing you both. Have a safe mission.” You gave them a warm smile, Kento nodded, and Yu waved eagerly at you when you walked away from the two, however, there was something Yu wanted to ask you which his friend of course noticed. “Well?” The blond turned to the young man next to him, “You know me too well, Kento.” The brunette whined as the two made their way over to their waiting area.

Yu knew exactly what he was feeling, ever since that talk with how your face switched from a child snatched from the wonder to one that had experienced the grace of all things when biting into simple foods, he would often watch you as you got you ate the food off campus and how happy these foods brought you. The time you would leave Jujutsu High just to go to convenience stores and stock up the fridge you had in your dorm just dedicated to you.

Yu oftentimes saw you walk by the group, you paid no attention as the only thing really on your mind was vending machine, they were near, and he’d pay attention to what you got, the specific drinks or the lunch the school had to offer. Yu dedicated himself to asking you a simple question and with that would lead him down the hole of just wanting to see you genuinely smile. 

Your coping mechanism for it all was simple, if you began to grow restless or emotionally exhausted or even just because you wanted to, you would splurge on food and the smile that painted your face was one that allowed Yu to feel at peace with such a heartwarming grin on your face that finally allowed you to leave such a cynical way of thinking and allow you to be happy.

Whenever you were on Yu's mind the image of your smile lingers like a gentle whisper, a reminder of a time when the world seemed painted in hues of possibility that even in such a world of pessimism there would be something to bring you joy. It was a chance encounter that made him want to be around you more, and his determination to make sure he does his hardest to make sure he can make you smile. 

Yu had begun to make small conversation with you, since you were more reclusive it was a bit hard for him, nonetheless he still made sure to get know as much about you as he could by including you in conversations when you were nearby and always acknowledging you. You two even exchanged numbers one day, you two were on a mission and decided to split up thus the two of you stayed on the phone while apart from another, he would start to text you using kaomojis every morning and anytime you left for a mission to wish you luck.

This would allow Yu to gain more confidence so he would make sure he could ask you just one question, he had called you outside from the classroom door and while you were confused you still decided to get up and make your way over to him, “Yes, Haibara?” Your voice was calm like the stillness of an untouched lake, the young man was a bit intimidated yet, he still asked you this question. 

“I was wondering if I could treat you to lunch!” You looked at him, a raised brow and a tilt of your head by such an invitation, you thought about how the first and only time you and Yu had talked was when you told them your views on being a Jujutsu Sorcerer. “Oh?” The silence was evident between the two of you, you wondered why Yu was asking such question, “Oh.” Yu was asking to hang out, most likely he wanted you to join him and Nanami, but he took the initiative to come and ask you to eat with him, you didn’t know Yu meant thus you agreed.

“Sure, Haibara.” You answered, the young man wanted to fly to the moon until you uttered your next words, “I should be the one spending though, I hear a lot about your money problems from Nanami so I would rather pay for your food instead especially if Nanami is coming as well.” Yu raised a brow at this before he spoke up, putting his hands up defensively as he then fully explained his plans to you, “No. I would much rather see you happy on my dime rather than yours.” You then watched as he got flustered, the pinkness of his fair cheeks whilst he continued to smile at you, “I wanna cook for you!” 

“Oh.”

A long pause was the only thing you could offer before you choked out your next words, “Cook for me?” You pointed to yourself, questioning what in the world he could be talking about with such a thing, the determined look never feels from Yu’s face as he had this large smile on his face. “You like eating, right? I could make our favorite meals and we can eat it together during lunch tomorrow?” Your eyes widened at such proposal, you felt your own face heat up at such as the offer arrived like a gentle breeze, carrying with it a sense of disbelief and wonder. 

You felt a tremor of vulnerability in that moment, someone wanting to cook for you just because they knew it made you happy, it was a sweet gesture that left you befuddled as you thought for a moment. “Would you let me cook for you?” To ask to cook for you? You wanted to melt into a puddle at his warmness, you were standing next to the sun and the beam of his smile with those eyes that could light up a dim room made your heart swell.

“Of course, Haibara.” You smiled at the boy, your eyes creased with joy as you felt this large smile pull at your lips, “I’d like that a lot.”  Yu’s act wasn't just about romantic feelings; it was a declaration that they saw you in a light you hadn't seen shined on you since you were a child. The revelation that someone could perceive you as more than just a cynic after such words was as surprising as it was heartwarming. 

Once you and Yu found an area where he wanted to eat with you, somewhere there wasn’t too much traffic yet an area to admire you whilst he watched you eat, once you took you the lid off and uncovered the casing of the food you loved so dear be prepped with such an attention to your feelings caused a puncture in your chest that almost made you fall over. 

“Make sure you eat up!” You directed your eyes over to the young man, the shine in his eyes that trampled over the sun above you, “I know you have a mission soon, so I made seconds I could bring you before you head over there.” You found yourself looking down at the food through your lashes, your eyes felt strained as you thought about those memories from once before, you looked down at the food finding comfort in its appearance as it reminded you of earlier times.

You watched as the food that was once made with love, adoration, and compassion with the hopes your closed loved ones who had tried their best shield you from such a hardening world would help you find such feelings in the box that was neatly put together just for you to enjoy. That food would be replaced by the meals that were made to give you muscle, concentration, and focus. No love was held in such foods as their purpose was only to fuel your body into becoming a weapon for the jujutsu sorcerers.

This gesture carried the recognition that your happiness could be kindled by something as simple as meal. As you began to dig into your food, a wave of realization washed over you- Yu had been paying attention all along, observing the subtle shifts in your demeanor when you indulged in the simple pleasure of a good meal. 

You couldn’t help but eat the food with so much of your heart bursting at the taste, you could feel the tears welling in your eyes with how the food had made you feel so comforted in your lowest moments, Yu’s want to cook for you left you feeling so happy with a warmness bubbling inside you.

Yu watched as you ate as it was an embodiment of his wish to nurture the side of you that had been overshadowed by skepticism of what this world could truly offer you. In their newfound revelation and their intention to cook for you, they found a mirror reflecting back the potential for change and growth. 

The way you ate slowly to savor each bite and the way a tear rolled down your cheek was on that made Yu a bit confused as he hadn’t cooked for himself in a while and doubted his own skills, it was a realization that hit Yu like a ton of bricks, the look in your face that revealed this side of you that Yu wanted to protect forever.

“Thank you, Haibara.” You swooned, your tone unknowingly made Yu’s cheeks flush, “It’s no problem! To know my cooking made you happy is all I could ever want.” The way your face had grown hot after such made you smile even more as you continued to eat, Yu would join shortly after as he enjoyed eating with you, the admiration the two of you shared for one another in that moment held true for the rest of the time you two had.

In the months that followed, his cooking became a source of comfort and connection. With each shared meal, he nurtured not just your taste buds, but a sense of belonging that had eluded you for so long. Yu’s genuine yearn for your happiness that built up inside of him had soon blossomed into the desire to be with you more. These feelings you both harbored for one another went beyond the food itself; it was woven into the very fabric of your actions. 

The way he crafted dishes that were tailored to your preferences with each bite infused with his love that only grew greater and greater the more the two of you had grown around each other. Haibara Yu's relentless determination to see you smile created a profound shift within you. It wasn't just about the food anymore; it was about the friendship that bloomed between the two of you. The young man’s presence became a safe haven, a space where you could shed the armor and embrace vulnerability without fear of judgment. 

With every meal and time spent, the world was one you saw through Yu’s with the hope that the two of you could see the beauty in everything with each others presence by one another’s side, you recognize the world that had been obscured by your own skepticism. 

As time passed, Yu's intentions became increasingly clear – he wasn't just here as someone who wanted to cook you food; he was there to see you at your happiest with a desire to be with you in a way that was closely intertwined the two of you. Yu cherished the memory of that first smile, the one that made him want to see that smile every day, and with time that smile prevailed even without food with just the sound of his voice and the knowing of his footsteps.

In the presence of Haibara Yu, you found not only a reason to smile but a reason to embrace life with renewed fervor. The ability to remember the significance of that initial smile was a testament to his attentiveness and his unspoken promise to continue cultivating happiness through his existence alone. 

In the realm of improbable beginnings, a single shared meal served as the catalyst for a love that defied all logic that came to mind. You were willing to throw everything, you would cry out to those above you to change everything and find a way out of the life you were forced into and instead live a normal life with one you were sure deserved better than all the endings you both could be met with.

You knew that you couldn’t fight it, there was no reason to fight it anyways, to run away from being a Jujutsu Sorcerer was punishable by death thus you would happily take your life to live your happiest days with one who brought you the happiness and joy to finally be around them in a bliss of normalcy without any way of hurting getting towards the young man you wanted to make sure that you could do what you needed to guarantee yours and his safety.

It was an ordinary encounter, yet it cast a spell that bound you to him. You two met in the place you both always ate your lunches, you asked him to meet you there before he left for his mission, an anniversary of a friendship as it had been an official year since you two first shared your meal together. 

“I don't think we should be here anymore.”

The love you held for Haibara Yu wasn't a fleeting infatuation, but a steadfast devotion that had held many trials and tribulations with your plans.  It wasn't solely based on the food, or the shared laughter, or the long stares; rather, it was a foundation built on mutual understanding of one another, the beauty of this world that you could not see before him, and intimate emotions that transcended words. 

And yet, the humor lay in the very attributes that fortified our connection - these same emotions held the power to destabilize the missions as you watched Yu throw himself in front of you, to ruin all chances of a future once announced of your arranged marriage for the sake of your clan, and the fact you could not escape the feeling of all being taken from you in that moment.

“Where should we go then?” Yu raised a brow, the feeling of confused excitement laced his words as you spoke, “Anywhere. Just us living normal lives, y’know?” The young man found himself still confused on what you were saying, “Even if it takes forever, I want you to just live a normal life one day.”

Your lives entwined in unexpected ways, drawn together by a shared purpose of giving your lives for society and an unspoken understanding that both of you couldn’t even began to comprehend about one another. With each passing mission, the two of you had grown closer, it wasn’t fueled by the shared victories or moments of vulnerability. It was the fact you wanted to do everything in your power to make sure you wouldn’t lose him.

“You could finally leave this inhospitable place and be happy in normalcy.” You told the boy, he said your name with a bit of embarrassment by such an inference, “It doesn’t have to be you sacrificing your life for everything when we can be normal for the rest of our lives.” Yu’s tone of confusion, less excitement as he was trying to grasp what you were trying to say, he muttered your name once more in dismay. 

The realization that the emotions you two harbored would become a double-edged sword.

“Our duty is to protect those who cannot do what we do.” Yu explained to you, you found your eyes faltering a bit, you watched as Yu’s expression was aggrieved that deprived you of the look that was once bathed you in joy. “I know that you don’t want me to go on these missions, but I need you to understand there is nothing that will prevent that.” 

You felt your heart crumble at such a sentence, “I will give my all to something I can actually do. I will not rest until my mission is complete.” Tears rolled down your cheeks, each one a testament to the unwavering affection that had leaked from the inability to keep such emotions under wraps. You spoke against your better judgment, “Forget the mission.” The young man’s voice got louder, feeling confusion and frustration as he found his voice, “I have a duty-” Your head snapped to look at him in the eyes, “Forget your duty!” 

Yu looked at you in disbelief by your words, you found your cheeks wet by such an outburst with your chest heaving at such a mention of giving his all, the weight of your unspoken feelings grew heavier, causing your heart to ache in silence. The ache wasn't solely from your inability to confess; it was exacerbated by the knowledge that his heart was different from yours and is too aching with the same unuttered truths. You both stood at the precipice of a love that defied the circumstances that bound the two of you to the reality of your existence.

Fear held you both captive, chained to the knowledge that wanting what is best for one another. Yu wanted a life with you, and you shared in this hopeful future. Watching Yu from a distance with tears in your eyes whilst your heart ached with a silent agony. The sound of his voice slowly becoming a bittersweet symphony that echoed through your mind, a constant reminder of the love you couldn't profess.

‘What would even be the point?’ 

You could tell him you loved him just to keep him there, he would do anything to make sure you’re happy. In your heart you knew how terrible that would be to make him stop what he has his heart sent on for the selfishness to keep him here with you for even longer than it had to be.

In your mind, the fact that Yu didn’t want to leave this awful place with you already gave you the lenses to see the future that was never there in the first place. The pain of unexpressed feelings intensified, manifesting as a gnawing depression that cast a shadow over even the brightest moments. The intricacies of the relationship you two shared kept us close yet distant, fostering a maddening duality of connection and detachment.

You would envision yourself uttering the words you longed to say, with a hope of a result in watching his eyes light up with the realization that both hearts share the harmony.

The reality of it always brought you back, to keep him here with you and make sure he stayed with you longer even if it meant jeopardizing everything he ever wanted or to stay silent and let him live the life he wants to live with him sacrificing it all just to make sure those who can’t do such will be okay.

You remained a silent, caught in a perpetual loop of love and longing, loyalty and restraint. The boy who held your heart, unknowingly gripping it so hard it would pop, he continued to occupy your thoughts and dreams, a beacon of light amidst the darkness of the chosen path.

You cannot come back from this moment.

“I’m sorry for invalidating your views, Yu.” 

You wipe the tears from your face and give him a large smile, he looked at you in disbelief for a moment before you gave him such a toothy smile, “It’s selfish for me to believe in such a thing as running away from our destiny.” You sighed, your throat rasped from your tears and the words that held a tight hold on your neck.

You accepted this.

“Fulfill your duty as a strong jujutsu sorcerer.” You told Yu, giving him a warm smile, the same returned to you that let you get enveloped in all the beauty the world had offer to you as you looked into his eyes. In Yu's eyes, he watched as you gave him a smile that made him feel whole. The young man wanted to embrace you, a tight hug to hide his face from the tears about to come out, yet he just smiled at you. 

“Thank you, [F/N].”

You both bid farewell to one another you stayed there as he ran off to go prepare for his trip, you smiled before he turned back to look at you, too far to hear anything he pulled out his phone and began to text you.

You found your hands shaky, the feeling of fear palpable before you finally found the phone in your pocket, your eyes are strained against the brightness with no help of anything since the dark clouds shielded the sun from you that day. You looked confused at him, his arm shooting up to wave at you before you heard the noise of the message and ran in the opposite direction, you opened your phone to read the message.

From: Yu Haibara ★ I have something to share with you as soon as I get back! I’ll make your favorite meal and everything! See ya real soon! (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧ Mon Jan 05, 2007