what we do in the shadows – season 3 sentence starters part 1
change tenses/pronouns as needed !! some lines have been edited for clarity / length / ease of roleplaying
tw : nsfw , language , death , sexism
‘still, he should not have done so much slaughtering.’
‘well, I guess I should just shut the fuck up then.’
‘thank you for saving us, but sorry, you’re our mortal enemy– you’ve got to die, babes.’
‘but how do you know he is not going to kill us? it is in his bloods.’
‘perhaps he is warning us of an imminent danger.’
‘now remember, do not look him directly in the eyes. we still do not know the depths of his power.’
‘so has there been any updates on my fate?’
‘I’m not trying to kill anyone either, except for you!’
‘you may speak but, remember, no bullshit from thy mouth.’
‘I love thrones! they’re my favorite chair.’
‘I became a vampire to suck blood and to fuck forever.’
‘you were shitting yourself for a moment there, weren’t you?’
‘is your brain fully operational?’
‘ (name) and I have agreed to work together as a team.’
‘ for now, I’m letting (name) think that we are ‘sharing power’.’
‘don’t monkey about with that!’
‘I’d go myself, but I can’t be fucked.’
‘these buns will be waiting for you.’
‘I am prepared to escalate matters to crazy levels!’
‘she’s angry, as women so often are.’
‘well, you started by calling me dipshit.’
‘you, my darling, have the high firm ass of an irish derby winner.’
‘it could be that he has feelings for you, too.’
‘you seem really into him.’
‘you have turned into a very very soft boy!’
‘me, personally, I don’t give a shit where he goes.’
‘the cat’s out the bag! your boy’s in love!’
‘I have no issue with (name).’
‘between you and me, I wouldn’t normally spend this much time with him.’
‘I figure the quicker he gets on with it, the quicker he’ll shut his mouth.’
‘agree with what? I didn’t say anything.’
‘I don’t really remember my mom anymore.’
‘we can have a girlie to girlie conversation.’
‘being a werewolf is not a crime!’
‘the only crime that my (name) is guilty of is stealing. stealing my heart.’
‘okay now look, we’re not here to cause trouble, we’re just here to, you know, be nice. and nonconfrontational.’
‘not only am I his bodyguard, I am also his heart guard.’
‘I always knew we couldn’t trust your kind!’
‘attention! the party bus will be leaving in a moment.’
‘no, I was just being polite. it’s obviously very shitty.’
‘holy shit! it’s just like ocean’s eleven!’
‘I mean, at every office I’ve worked at, they always say ‘we’re a big family here’. and it does motivate people to work harder and neglect their actual families and put up with all sorts of degrading shit.’
‘have you got a little secret, you little sick fuck?’
‘do you know what the most beautiful thing in the world is? fucking.’
‘you know how it is when you have the binge - watch blinders on. I got caught up in a show that i’m obsessed with.’
‘I can feel my powers fading!’
‘I need to borrow your credit card and not tell you why.’
‘fucking knicks. they’ll break your heart every time. but I can’t quit ‘em.’
‘listen, I trust you. you’re my main man, I’d die for you.’
‘I need to sort this, and I need to sort it now.’
‘and in a single instant, my world was turned upside down.’
‘I am all alone, floating through the cold, dark universe like a little grain of furry sand.’
‘I have never felt so small, and what is the point of anything?’
‘i’m pretty certain it might be this way.’
‘it’ll take awhile to play but I think if we start now we should be done by dawn.’
‘I could kiss you, (name)!’
‘it’s all a big game of chess. I just didn’t say who was playing whom.’
‘okay hear me out, if you tell me the rules, I’d be down to follow them.’
‘that was a shit response, wasn’t it?’
‘I guess I do fucked-up shit now. that’s just who I am.’
‘no one said that. please do not talk anymore.’
‘okay, fine, I don’t even care at this point.’