Get your ass in the Impala!

1.  Must look good in plaid. 

2.  Must *vaguely* resemble some kind of animal.

3.  Must be able to look ridiculously attractive in literally any situation.

4.  Must struggle with feelings of paternal abandonment.

5.  Must have an addictive personality and/or alcoholism.

(Don’t look so innocent, Sammy.  We know about the demon blood.)

6.  And probably PTSD.

7.  Must be the object of at least one supernatural being’s affection.

8.  Must be a master of dramatic eye-rolls. 

9.  And bitch face.

10. And finally, must be able to die a lot yet remain oddly unaffected.  

Lol! :p 

Go to Google, literally type “the greatest love story ever told” and search. You’ll get millions of results, but click the very first link; it goes to Urban Dictionary. 

The text says: 

The story of a man afraid of flying, and an angel afraid of falling, who somehow met in the middle. The man who denied the existence of angels came to love one. The angel who never felt began to feel. 

The man who was saved from an eternity in Hell by an angel. The angel who fell in every way imaginable for a man. The man, with a clear path to escape, decided instead to stay in Purgatory for a year, searching for his angel, praying to him every night. Begging. When he found him, he held him; he told him that he needed him, that he’d get him out, even if it killed them both. 

The angel rejected his faith, his family, his home, and everything he knew, so he could keep the man safe. They stay together despite fate, despite what they are, because they refuse to be pulled apart.

“We’re family. We need you. I need you.”“I’m hunted, I rebelled, and I did it, all of it, for you.”  People aren’t exaggerating when they call Destiel the greatest love story ever told.

…and man, the unrelenting sexual tension between this this guy

and this guy

I mean, damn! And I don’t ship, man. I. DO. NOT. SHIP.

But like, when they’re nice to each other it’s great–but when they fight? SO REPRESSED. MUCH TENSION. JUST KISS ALREADY. WOW.

Not to mention all the flirtatious language/behavior:

Danno to McGarrett: What are you wearing?

McGarret to Danno:  I’ll think about you the whole time I’m gone, Boo-boo (that’s a conglomeration of two lines, but YES he called Danno “BOO-BOO”)

McGarrett to Danno: *removes shirt and/or pants at any opportunity*

Danno to McGarrett: *complains about naked partner, stares admiringly*

McGarrett to Danno: *does impressive, manly things like towing Danno back to shore in their stranded dinghy…which requires him to take his shirt off*

Danno to McGarrett: *refuses to admit that manly, impressive McGarrett is, in fact, manly and impressive* Why do you have to be such a Navy Seal? What is it with Navy Seals? You’re such a Navy Seal, Steven. Such a Navy Seal. *stares admiringly*

Danno to McGarrett: You look good when you clean up, babe. Nice suit/Dress blues/tux. Here, lemme fix your tie. 

McGarrett to Danno: You’re not wearing a tie! Just like I asked! *fond smile*

THE CUDDLING

Danno AND McGarrett, multiple times: *Interrupt each other’s attempts to sleep with other people*

Danno AND McGarrett, multiple times: Our marriage. Let’s talk about our marriage. This is my partner, Daniel/Steven. We are married.

Everyone Else: So how long have you two been married? / Hey, are you talking to your wife? (When McGarrett’s on the phone w/Danno)

I am not kidding. This is LITERALLY them. At couple’s counseling. Arguing about who gets to drive. 

And Danny is just so SMOL AND ANGRY. (ง'̀-‘́)ง

And McGarrett is just so TOL AND COMPETENT, and loves his smol angry blond boy. (✿◠‿◠)

Ship sails its goddamn self, man. Sails its goddamn self.

• PLEASE WATCH IN 720p • 

Contains footage from 9x23, so spoilerwarning for you who haven’t seen it yet. SORRY FOR THIS SUPER ANGSTY VIDEO, EVERYONE.

Epic Winchester catches.

and then there’s the one time it didn’t work…