_ C O D E R //:

           ‘  Only if she wants to lose her job  ’  he quips in a whisper, grinning at the idea. He can’t recall the woman’s face, or where to even start looking, but rumours spread like wildfire. It wouldn’t be hard with a process of elimination. Besides, the pairing is unlikely - Joe concludes ‘  Grab your things, I’ll meet you at the elevator in three minutes. Don’t be late  ’

             Closing his eyes Joe accepts the kiss without any further questions, nothing needs to be said for them both to understand what it means. They’re together, finally, after a prolonged period of time and that completed them both. Joe can’t speak for Ryan, and he never would, but the way the body moulds into his reminds him that everything is alright. Just as it is, at least in that moment.              ’   You’re always welcome  ’ a lot is still unsaid, parts that they would no doubt argue about later. The frustration of not being able to work in his desired field, Joe having to still chase progress, them having to live under the same roof while it’s happening. Joe’s brain works a million miles an hour as he tries to run through all the possible scenarios, answering the questions before Ryan even has a chance to ask them. It’s important that he knows, he has to be the strongest out of the two of them. It’s a toxic line of thought, one that feeds into the overbearing egotistical part of his personality but he’d lived this long with it, and Ryan seemed to like the reassurance.               He allows himself the moment to set it aside, placing a gentle kiss on Ryan’s shoulder before continuing with his sentence ’   — to come back, and to kiss me. Whenever you want, I’ll always be here  ’

             unsure of what to do with his hands once ryan’s removed the clothes he just balls them into a fist, his fingers clenching and relaxing as he’s touched. and then ryan leaves again and joe’s gaze is fixated on the back of his head, a longing smile passing between them once their eyes meet a final time. when ryan finally looks away, joe takes an involuntarily step forward and then stops when he realises there’s a choice to make. 

                   a few hours ago ryan hated him and now he was openly inviting him back into — well, whatever they had been before everything had taken place. joe can’t recall ever conversing about the status of their relationship, nothing with official labels anyway, just that - on some level - they’d begun dating at some point and that along that line they’d both became mutually exclusive. it’s a comfort to know that nothing had changed, despite the initial resentment that’d taken place, and although he may just be retreating into the nostalgia of it all, he knows he’s unable to resist what ryan is offering. 

                 joe removes his clothes, draping them over the sink before padding over to the shower. closing the glass door behind him, there’s a deep rooted uncertainty of how to progress from here but he takes a timid step forward anyway, hoping that he’s not overstepping the boundaries by crossing over ryan’s personal barrier. then again, the invitation had been extended and joe knows that if it gets too uncomfortable, ryan’ll just push him away and let him know. the fear of rejection still doesn’t hinder his motions, however, and less than a handful of seconds later he’s cocooning his body over ryan’s. with his head resting on the man’s shoulder he takes the hit of the water on his back, feeling more comfortable in that moment then he had in a while.

              ‘  thank you —- for coming back to me  ’

       This feels like the longest wait he’s ever done—longer than prison—only because Ryan doesn’t know for sure if Joe will come. He’s confident, but the part of himself that isn’t fills with doubt. Maybe Joe wants space after a vulnerable moment, too embarrassed to stay. Maybe Ryan’s imagining it when he notices the longing in Joe’s eyes. Maybe his own neediness is off-putting. So many negative maybes are squashed when the shower door slides open.

       A soft exhale glides out of his mouth and his eyes close against the alleviating tide relaxing his shoulders. The beat of his heart slows to a normal pace. Ryan is hyperaware of Joe behind him. He’s a grand presence which comforts, especially once those arms wrap around him and the touch of Joe’s body sinks into Ryan’s back. It’s only then he realizes just how much he’s missed this. He craves this kind of intimacy, deserted during his stay in a cell. He’s subconsciously aware of his hands rising to grasp Joe’s forearms, his hold unbreakable, to remind himself this is real. It grounds him more than anything else ever has, all because it’s Joe. He feels better than the warm water rushing down on them.

       “Thank you for accepting me back,” Ryan counters quietly, partially in disbelief. Joe isn’t aware he’s saving Ryan, but it’s in his eyes when Ryan gazes steadily at Joe.

          Joe grins before biting at his bottom lip, leaning over the office cubicle to get in closer ‘  what you doing for dinner?  ’ he asks, already expectant of no commitment. 

             ‘  you’re cute when you work, even if it is just accounting  ’

@delctrl // liked for JOE

bake  a  cake  from  scratch.   ride  a  horse.   drive  a  submarine.   speak  a  second  language. dance.  catch  a  fish.   play  an  instrument.   throw  a  punch.  build  a  deck.   ice  skate.   unclog  a  drain.   program  a  computer.   change  a  flat  tire.   fire  a  gun.   sew.   juggle.   play  poker.  paint.   fly  a  kite.   sculpt.   write  poetry.   change  a  diaper.  sing.  shoot  a  bow  &  arrow.   ride  a  bike.   swim.  sail  a  boat.  do  a  back  flip.  play  chess.   give  cpr.  pitch  a  tent.   flirt.   stitch  a  wound.   read  palms.   use  chopsticks.   write  in  cursive  /  calligraphy.  use  an  electric  drill.   braid  hair.   make  a  campfire.  make  a  mixed  drink. do  sudoku  puzzles.  wrap  a  gift.   give  a  good  massage.  jump - start  a  car.  roll  their  tongue.   magic  tricks.  do  yoga.   tie  a  tie.  skip  a  rock.  shuffle  a  deck  of  cards.   read  morse  code.   pick  a  lock.