gustokomatulog

Shang Qinghua, once Xiang Fei, sprawled on the cushions scattered on the floor of his leisure house, head pillowed on the now very muscular thighs of his twice over husband. The thought quickly passed from his brain to his mouth as he asked, "Hey, what do we count as our anniversary? We have so many dates we could use. And like, I got asked when we met and I have no idea what to say, let alone when we got married. So, like, we got married, then we died, now we're married again. Does that make us double husbands? Ex and not ex husbands? Wait, does this technically count as necro-"

Ma Qingan, once Shen Yuan, slapped his hand over his mouth and leaned in to hiss in his ear, "Do not finish that sentence. Unless you want me to return to my peak and you can sleep alone."

He shook his head, pulling at his husband's hand until he pulled it away. "Noooo, please, I was just thinking and you know how it gets when my thoughts bypass the filter. Just-" he wanted his hand, trying to gesture his thoughts running away like a bullet train flying off the tracks, but judging by the look on his husband's handsome face that didn't come across. "I was just thinking about, like, us, you know? Like, what do we even count as our first meeting now? It was kinda weird before we died, but now we have yet another one to add!"

Ma Qingan opened his mouth, then stopped, then tapped the end of the brush in his hand against his lips as he thought. It was one of the many charming habits that had survived their transmigration intact. "Hm, that is a good question. I suppose if someone who doesn't know our cover story asks, we can say we met as disciples when we were chosen to be peak lords. I don't think any of our martial siblings will ask, so we don't need to try to settle that argument about when we met in our past lives." Ah, trust good old Shen Yuan to come up with the most logical solution. "Though it was still when you answered my ad for a housemate."

Oh, that asshole! "No, we met in college! We were in the same damn intro to psychology class! You sat two rows ahead of me nearly every day!"

He gave the most withering glare he could manage, "That doesn't count. I never saw you, and we only interacted briefly in the class group chat. We met when you emailed me about the listing and got to talking!"

Shang Qinghua sat up, jabbing one very nicely firm yet squishy pec with his finger, "No, no, you already knew my name and who I was! Therefore we met in class! You even said that you knew me when we were chatting and trying to decide if we were cool living together!"

"Just because I recognized your name and weird little avatar doesn't mean we met! I genuinely thought you were that taller, skinnier man who always sat right next to the door. Therefore, we met later." He dared to speak like that was the end of it, this very old argument wasn't getting settled like that.

"No, we met in class, I was just beneath your fancy rich ass at the time. And the avatar wasn't weird, it was a joke! Someone in the comments once joked that Mobei-Jun and Shang Qinghua were probably making out in the background while all the plot went on, made it a meme and I used it as my profile pic." He had actually been kinda proud of that one, even if some of the more homophobic fans had kicked up a huge fuss about icky gays possibly daring to exist in their stallion novel. The joke was on them though, not only was the author gay, but he and Shen Yuan used to try out a lot of the positions from the later arcs! He based at least 3 wife arcs off the kinky shit they got up to with the benefits of modern sex toys and lube. He still missed the many things he could get with the power of the Internet and his husband's black card.

Shen Yuan seemed to take a moment to process that. Oh, what was the issue now? Maybe his internalized homophobia was cropping up again? He'd say it made him nostalgic, but that was one of the things he didn't miss about their old lives, along with the shitty air quality and constant noise. "You had Shang Qinghua making out with Mobei-Jun. A'Fei, you're Shang Qinghua now! That means it's you, my husband, making out with the demon who may very well kill you at some point if we haven't changed the plot enough. Do you see the issue?"

"Okay, point taken, but I wasn't him back then! Therefore, still funny. Besides, we both know he prefers beating me up to making out. Sadly."

He was answered with an eyeroll, "Uh huh, so sad your plot-ordained killer doesn't want to kiss you. When you have a husband. Unless you prefer ice demon to peak lord?" He looked away, tense enough that he knew this was treading too close to a sore point.

He immediately climbed into his husband's lap, pressing kisses everywhere he could reach. "No, never! I'd never leave you for anyone, you've been stuck with me for two lives and I intend to make it three. Now, if we could arrange a threesome..."

He was pushed away with a groan, but he spotted that little pleased smile so he wasn't fooled into thinking he was actually mad. "If. Maybe if he didn't hit both of us any chance he got." He looked back down at the paperwork he had abandoned. "You know, if we really need to talk about our first meeting, let's just say we met a few times but it took a while for us to finally click. Once we did, that was it."

How the hell was he even cuter now when he was both larger and more buff than he had been in their last lives?! "Awww, you're so sweet." He shoved his way back into his lap, plastering himself over his dear, prickly husband. "Never would have thought that cold beauty I watched in class could have such a warm, gooey interior. Hm, maybe you can show me how warm you really are?"