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Past Scarlett Johansson x fem!reader
Present Elizabeth Olsen x fem!reader
Warnings: angst (?), some bad words, I pretended reader wrote some famous songs but all the rights go to the real authors!!
Songs: "Happier than ever" Billie Eilish | "Cherophobia" Martina Antilli | "Lost cause" Billie Eilish
This is a part two of the previous story. The idea was given to me by an amazing girl on wattpad!
Itâs been years since the day Scarlett left your house stepping on your heart. And you havenât been doing well.
If earlier going out drinking and fucking random girls in bars was a once a week thing, now it became a routine. Going to clubs, getting drunk as fuck, having sex with some chicks, sleeping till noon and then starting over again.Â
Thatâs when the press started to notice, and thatâs why you hate being a famous singer. Everyone always finds out what youâre doing, no secrets. The first pics started to appear on the cover pages of the magazines, they pictured you smoking weed, drinking and making out with strangers. They started calling you whore, slut, drug addict and more. At that point you had hit rock bottom, you werenât even able to do music anymore.Â
Thatâs when your mother suggested you go away for a while. âKnowing sheâs far away from you, will make you feel better (y/n/n).â she said as you walked past the airportâs gate.Â
Everyone says new home, new life. Well that didnât apply to you, at least not in the first few months. Your routine didnât change at all, until one day walking down Sunset Boulevard you saw a young boy sitting on a paper box while playing the guitar. At this point, while the music flies in the hot hair of Los Angeles,you feel a void start growing inside of you. You missed singing, the hard wood of the guitar under your fingers, the vibrations of the strings as you pinch them.Â
Thatâs when you decided you wanted to change and you were ready to ask for help. You wanted your life backÂ
In the meantime Scarlett went on with her life, or at least thatâs what she told herself. For how much she tried she couldnât take you out of her mind. The pain in your eyes, the tears and your outburst still hunted her dreams after years. How did she end up hurting you so much when avoiding it was all she cared about and the reason why she ended things between you two? She couldnât find an answer.
When your not so healthy lifestyle appeared all over the internet and magazines things started getting worse, cause she knew it was all her fault. She wanted to go visit you and try to help you move on, but then she would find herself wondering âIs it really a good idea or will I make her suffer more?âÂ
Well by the time she decided you had already flown all the way to sunny California.Â
Then there was Rose. Gosh this little girl missed you like crazy, but her mom had not the guts to tell her you were gone forever. So her answers were always the same â(y/n) is really busy little bean. Iâm sorry.â or âSheâs not in town right now Rosie.â
Anyway, whatever excuses Scarlett puts up for her daughter she couldnât bear the sadness in the kids eyes. It broke her heart day after day, but she couldnât bring herself to tell her the truth , cause Rose would have ended up hating her for sending her âmamaâ away.
In the end it was her fault.
TIME SKIP 4 MONTHS LATER (Cause I can)
Therapy isnât as stupid as youâve thought, itâs actually bringing you somewhere. Itâs still too early to say youâre as good as new and ready to start again, but youâre working on it.
Youâve started understanding that you live for no one, but for yourself. Thatâs what you and Scarlett had was amazing, yeah, but you canât go on remaining clinging to the past cause youâre afraid of what will happen in the future
And with that said youâve started writing songs again. Addison (not me in love with Addison Montgomery in greyâs), your therapist, told you that expressing everything youâve felt and are still feeling, in the form of music, helps to metabolize everything.Â
And she was right. The more songs you write the more you can look back at things in an objective way and let them go.
âWhen Iâm away from you
Wish I could explain it better.â
It took you time to admit it, and probably this is the hardest song you ever wrote, but as soon as you said it out loud for the first time you felt like a huge weight had been lifted from your chest.Â
Youâre better without her, Youâre happy away from her. And you donât know why it took you so long to admit it.Â
TIME SKIP 2 MONTHS LATER (Cause I can)
So everything was going good, you were writing music again, you were clean both from alcohol and from weed. You even met a cute redhead (Iâm obsessed with red haired girls) on the beach and went on a few dates with her.
So yeah, everything was going good until it wasnât.
You donât even know when it started to go south again. It happened so quickly that you didnât even have time to realize it. One day you were happy, the next one you were afraid of this happiness.
âCome te la spiego la paura di essere felici
Quando non lâhanno capita nemmeno i miei amiciâ
(How do I explain you the fear of being happy
When not even my friends have understood it)
âIt's hard to explain!â That's what you say to Addison when she asks you whatâs wrong. And youâre not lying. You donât know how to explain it , cause it doesnât even make sense to you. Itâs like a voice inside of your brain, everytime you almost reach happiness, whisper âYou donât deserve it.â and you believe it.
âCome te la spiego la spiego tutta la pazienzaÂ
Che ci metto ma non riesco a vivere senza
Perchè ho un cervello che è strafatto di spine."
(How do I explain to you all the patienceÂ
That I put into it but I canât live without
Something that oppresses me
Cause my brain is stoned with thorns)
And you tried, God knows how much you tried to fight it in the beginning. But then you start growing tired and this feeling of constant fear of being happy starts to feel good. âIf Iâm not happy, I canât get hurt again.â thatâs what you say to yourself every time a part of you try to look for an ounce of happiness.
âQuesta è la mia Cherofobia
Questa è la mia Cherofobia
Questa è la mia CherofobiaÂ
No, itâs not negativity
All of your friends, old or new, it doesn't matter, start to leave. They donât understand you, for them youâre just being exaggerated, fake. And they donât want a friend that would slow them or stop them from doing what they want. So one by one starts to leave you behind.
Only one sticks by your side, Elizabeth Olsen. Sheâs such a sweetheart, she never leaves your side and helps you fight the voices in your head.Â
TIME SKIP 1 YEAR LATER (Cause I can)
âYou ainât nothinâ but a lost cause
And this ainât nothinâ like it once wasâ
Thatâs the lyric of your last song that keeps repeating in your mind, as you walk hand in hand with your girlfriend Lizzie in Central Park.
Yes, youâre back in New York, but only for a couple of weeks. You accompanied Elizabeth on her press tour for her new movie ''Doctor Strange 2â (Iâm in love with villain Wanda guys).
And yes, you and Lizzie got together in the end. It took you a while to definitely get over Scarlett, Elizabeth was there by your side and in the end you find yourself being madly in love with her.Â
You two are chatting about where to go for dinner tonight when you see a very familiar face sitting on a bench. You look at Lizzie strangely calm and point to her where Scarlett was sitting, she looks at you and asks âYou wanna go talk to her or we run away like two crazy girls?â. You love how she always tries to make you laugh when you have to face something that freaks you out. You found it cute. You shake your head smiling and answer âI guess we can just walk away like two normal people, Liz.â âBut we arenât normal, kittenâŚâ she adds while smirking at you, and in that moment you know something crazy has just come up to her mind. She grabs your hand and starts running round the park dragging you behind her, as she giggles so loud that all the pigeons fly away and half of the park turns to look at you. But you donât care as you pull her arm lightly, making her almost fall over you before connecting your lips in a messy kiss.
At the hearing of loud giggles and the rustle of wings, she takes her eyes away from her book and starts looking for the source of all this mess. And thatâs when she sees you, lips locked with her ex co star Elizabeth and a dumb smile on your face. She remembers that smile, itâs the one you make whenever you are truly happy, and seeing you smiling for something that it wasnât her hurt. But she doesnât have the right to feel betrayed, in the end it was all her fault.
âYou ainât nothinâ but a lost cause
And this ainât notinâ like it once was.â Â