A friend of mine died on the 29th of june from the fucking heatwave that hit germany recently.
We only found out today from his mother...
Loss is such a confusing fucked up i feel it so deep in my heart pls make it stop thing.
But i know that a lot of his life was already pretty hard with the ilness he had and yet he would have turned 28 by the end of this month.
Im so at a loss for words, we werent as close recently as we were then but i have such amazing memories. I mean that guy taught me how to properly play bg3 !!!! Thats insane!
We had a few Fights but way more laughs and im so heartbroken that he died alone in his room possibly mistaking a bad heat stroke for another MS flare up.
He also had the worst mother and now shes throwing his funeral ON HER WISH fully alone.... vile. Insane.
I keep crying not knowing what to make of my thoughts. We spoke in a way to each other that would leave others confused, we shared a pretty intense suicidal idiation thing and i hate the thought of him maybe ignoring a few symptoms on purpose so so much.
I hope you can rest in peace now J.
I turn 27 in exactly two months.
Life is a sick fucking joke man.
