Bonjour

No matter how far Jakarta to Osnabrück, i believe that Krisna was that kind of guy.

Yes, i read your profile, it was quite impressive, a nerd genius, a perfectionist, but not so aggressive

I shared my dreams and you catch it perfectly, and you spread your beautiful color in my every single step.

Hari ini

“Sayang aku otw pulang, capek banget”

Sampe rumah malah nntn marvel, lupa ngabari dan hp ketinggalan di mobil

Pas ambil hp dr mobil udah 8 panggilan tak terjawab

Ketika ku telp balik beliau langsung protes

“Kl udah sampai apart bs langsung kabari aku dulu nggak? Aku jauh, kalau ada apa aku ga bs langsung nyamperin kamu, at least aku pengen tau km udah sampai apart dan sudah aman”

Seketika ingin nangis...

Dan cm berkata “makasih sayang, aku mandi dulu” mehehhehe

I asked God that i want master degree boyfriend, then I realized that what i really want was a man who has a broad insight.

I asked God that i want a man who can respect me, and also honest with me

And in my past, i met 2 man that i loved the most at that time. The first one was 8 years of relationship, and the second was a year of relationship

I was in toxic relationship with both of them. I feel useless, and unwanted at the same time.

After coupe of unhealthy relationship, I asked God that i want to be full by my self, i want to be happy because of me, and people surround me.

And of course God let me happy by myself, God let me feel full of myself and God made me i love myself most.

After that, I didn’t search for love from men, i feel im in love with myself, and, he came.

He is my friend’s friend. He also went to the same major and university with me, he also attended some university events that also me in it, but I didn’t know him at all. Ah what a silly me

Until i heard a rumor that one of architecture student in my uni moved to Germany, it was about his second year in uni

Im asked my friends “who the heck moved to Germany in his second year? What a waste” and my friends told me that it was Krisna, and i was like “Krisna? Who is Krisna?”

Then magically he followed me in instagram but i still haven’t a single clue what year he was followed me on instagram

2019, the first time he talked to me (on instagram), he says “merry Christmas” and i was like “ah Krisna, maybe he knows me but I didn’t know him at all”

After that he started to commenting my story, we have a little conversation back then, but i still like “who are you? I didn’t even know you”

But from those little conversations, he let me knowing him little by little, until.....

He appeared 5 months ago, he asked me my number, and i was like “hah? Not again, i give you my number but don’t text me every time”

And, in christmas 2020 he said the same thing that he says to me in 2019. Just a simple “merry Christmas” and everything turns different

He started to talk to me everyday, he sent me good morning texts, he tells me jokes and he also care about me

I feel really comfortable with him, he has big insights about world and anything, he is good, he is nice, he also loves God.

Me from “who are you? I didn’t even know you” was turning into “i love you, thank you for being here”

You know what, he is the best boyfriend that ever exists in my life. When i feel full with myself, he came, and he make it twice, he makes me love myself more, he makes me love him and he makes me so thankful to God that He made me meet this person

When we have plans and we didn’t know yet how to complete our plans, he says “it’s okay, WE will find a way, we do our best, we pray, we ask God to lead our relationship” oh that’s the most sweet word i ever heard

He said “we” instead “I” and from that word, i know that he is not selfish, and he treated me right and gentle. He know my boundaries but he didn’t want to cross my boundaries, and i like those simple things.

He has everything i wanted and i need. God gave me someone who can complete me. Even though we are apart, i feel he is here with me. This 5-6 hours of different time and 11.000 km away is not a big deal for us. We knows that God have big and beautiful plan for us.

Thank you Krisna for loving me, and i will love you like you did.

Me, you biggest fan :)

Me: “oghe siyap”

Dan ini yang terjadi 🤣

Dari aku tidur dia masih bangun, aku bangun dan dia masih tidur...

Him :

But there is a bigger power in univerese that can make a lot of magical things in my life

Betul betul muncul sosok yang diharapkan, persis bahkan

Aku di kamar benerin kerjaan, beliau masak...

I was blind, i didnt realize that God pull me out from my past toxic relationship. Blaming my self, i have insecurities for my self, just hurting my self day by day.

During my 1 year heartbroken moment, i was looking for someone who can cheer me up, who can makes me smile again, but i was wrong, i was wrong that im hanging my happiness to someone.

I learned to letting go everything, i told to my self “my happiness is depending on me, the one who can safe me is my self” then day passes by, i just do what u have to do, working 8 to 8, enjoying those super duper crowded public transportation, walking home and have a good good sleep.

“Kamu kan masih sakit?”

“Kok masuk kantor?”

“Sekarang udah smp apt belum?”

kekhawatiran yang sempat disimpan berhari hari ternyata terbukti hanya omong kosong pikiran ku saja, yang ditakutkan tidak terjadi, justru setika berani melangkah, yang diimpikan terjadi.