blue skies & sunshine

“hey!” daniel points to him, trying to sound indignant, though he laughs through it, ruining the whole effect. “that may be true but they’re effective! and i read a ton of books on education to master them!” he tells solomon, the last not being an actual joke even though it sounds like one. while recovering, daniel had limited access to entertainment and he actually read books on how to raise a kid. “sounds like you’re gonna come back and order more of these after that,” daniel says, referring to the getting wasted part. “yeah! i’m making buying some, making some. make sure to have some candy, i know where you live.”

daniel doesn’t always admit that he sacrificed fun for his duties, always the first to rush in and say that there’s nothing like it happening. it’s even rarer for him to admit the reason behind it. he was a problematic kid, too worried about having fun and finding his story, whatever that means. it brought nothing but trouble to him and everyone around it so if he’s honest, daniel feels a little guilty on the prospect of having fun as if he’s undeserving of it. he still has long ways to go when it comes to making peace with his past and the person that he used to be. it’s not unlikely of him to bury himself in work or other responsibilities to run away from anything that resembles self care.  and he knows- knows that it’s not a healthy way to go about his life, but he feels he took too much already and it’s time to give. for the past almost-eleven years. it feels weird to have eddy tell him that he deserves then and he deflects it, with a half-hearted laugh and a scratch to the back of his neck. “yeah, i guess-” he says. “though, really, i’m in. i haven’t been out in a very long time except for a few dates so i’m rusty,”

“yes, any time, kid,” daniel says with a smile. “i’m actually very good at those. it’s like ted talks but dad talks. talk to hope, she’d love to share audience with someone else,” he jokes. though, really, he thinks hope might agree with company. daniel never saw himself becoming the kind of dad he is today - desperate to please and do the right thing and very insecure. though, he never saw himself becoming a dad at all. he sees a bit of the same attitude here, trying to do the right thing but having his insecurities nag at him. that’s why, when solomon suggests the change of subject, he jumps right in. “yes, okay. halloween. what are you doing?” 

daniel chuckles, nodding amusingly at eddy. it’s nice to know that one part of parenting is going smoothly for him. “well, ain’t you the lucky one,” he jokes, leaning over the kitchen counter. he groans just so at the change of subject and dramatically stretches his arms over his head. “oh, they sure do,” he says and scratches the scruff on his jaw, looking thoughtfully towards the two of them. daniel never regrets spending all the time he has with hope. however, he has to admit that having a kid transformed him in some sort of hermit. he would cater to hope’s every need and then be off working and then therapy, and then- “man, i haven’t had a day off in ages,” he thinks out loud. 

“hey, they’re not pity croissants,” daniel retorts. it is not pity, not quite. rather, he feels sorry that he might’ve pushed solomon too far. “they’re apology croissants. i didn’t mean to... pressure you into talking. so, yeah, i’m bribing you, if you think about it,” he says, trying to soften the mood between them yet again. solomon is a good person. daniel wouldn’t have hired him and put up with his antics if he didn’t think so. he nods at him, takes a deep breath. “okay. just remember. you are a good kid and though there are those people, there are people like me who see the best in you,” he shrugs. “just so you know.”

the question takes him by surprise. see? again, not equipped for this. daniel sighs, really pauses to think about it. “well, if this person is now my friend,” he starts, “i guess i would go. it would feel awkward, sure, but not unbearable if i see them only as a friend. i wouldn’t want to potentially upset a friend on their wedding day.”

“i can’t wait!” he says, getting into his character. it takes a bit of time for him to sit, hope not being able to decide soon enough where she wants him. when he finally does though, he closes his eyes. he hears his child’s giggles and her whispering things to ira (oh god) and a louder, “no peeking, papa!” before he feels the flower crown on his head. it’s just slightly uncomfortable, which is better than he expected. “can i look now? do i look gorg or what?”

“that’s because you haven’t got the ones that scream at you ‘cuz you got the wrong shade of pink on the frosting,” daniel shivers, recalling a particularly bad encounter when his father was still leading the business. “i got you kid. we got plenty of work so no need to worry about that.” he gets the bowls of the mixers then, hands them to maia. “speaking of, can you wash those for me? i’ll clean the actual machines,”

daniel can see in solomon’s change of expression and his dry response that he pushed the kid a bit too far. he thinks he’s trying to do something good for him and his eagerness to help makes him blind to the fact that solomon doesn’t have to talk to him about it. so he sighs, puts his hands up just so. “okay, okay. it sucked and it was unfair and i’m bringing you another croissant,” he says, trying to diffuse the situation. daniel doesn’t mean to add mad at his former boss to the pile of things the boy has to deal with. “it’s on the house. sorry for pushing, kid. i just worry, it’s what i’m programmed to do.”

“c’mon,” daniel says at eddy’s self deprecating comments. “i bet you’re a better cook than you give yourself credit for. if you can feed a child, you can’t be that bad,” he states, knowing just how much children can be picky about their food. he himself had a bad experience with hope at age six because suddenly everything on her plate looked back. thanks to grandma annelise they were capable of working something out and hope eats fairly well now. so, to be fair, any food that children won’t toss to the other side of the room is good good. “i’m glad you’re feeling good, though, man. and sofia! so glad to see her back. i hope the two of them don’t cause too much damage tonight,” he jokes, though he is sure to keep an eye on the two girls because despite humor, it’s not such a remote possibility. 

sometimes, daniel supposes that he is a bit paranoid. at least when it comes to anything involving alcohol consumption. he knows most people can drink unholy amounts without going down the same path he did, however, he can’t see it and not cringe at it. he noticed that ro coming to the bakery smelling like whatever they had at night was becoming more like a tradition. it worries him, being somewhat familiar with ro’s story, but he decides that it’s not his place to pry. not yet. “sounds like you need a cup of coffee,” he tells them, already grabbing a cup. “think you gonna be able to rest till then?”

with every word tate says daniel feels less and less like he should be giving advice on the matter. he can’t think of a similar situation to empathize better with the boy. he can, of course, but that’s in the field of imagination and not true experience. “well,” he starts, “then i think you gotta ask yourself what’s gonna bother you more. not going and missing the celebration or going and feeling weird.”