Daniel Looks

Brendan Ji-Kwong Lui 雷智權/지권

My father and I both wrote some reflections on my son’s name… In a name are stories, there are prayers, there are hopes… and hopefully instead of marking boundaries to his identity, they will mark a starting place for Brendan to discover who God created him to be! From Grandpa: (Yeh Yeh) Expecting you, my first grandson, in a few days; some thoughts on the name chosen for you: Brendan Ji-Kwon…

Still a worship leader

Ministry realization: I haven’t lead musical worship in almost a decade, but I don’t think I can stop leading worship. Not necessarily musical worship anymore, but worship. Spiritual director asked why I still do ministry, and today I realized at the core of it, I love that moment when humans are surprised by God’s presence and articulate what they have witnessed with awe and gratitude back to…

She Lives On…

It was Mother’s Day two years ago. We sat in my grandparents’ backyard in the shade of the veranda. After 30+ years, the porch was dilapidated with decaying wood and rusted tools. The chairs were falling apart and could barely support my overweight grandpa. We had just finished the garden tour that Ma ma (grandma) takes me on every visit to describe the condition of her garden. It was falling…

After a week of voicing my community’s pain to other people- my pastors, my small group, helping my team of asian-american women process their pain… this morning the weight of the pain collapsed on me, as I finally had a chance to voice to MYSELF the pain I feel. I go to an outdoor spin class (distanced, all with headphones on)… and found myself yelling out loud, and thankfully everyone had…

Wearing their dreams on my wrist…

I remember being exhausted in the hospital. It was a prolonged goodbye to Ma Ma (chinese for paternal grandma) as her body fought to keep her around long enough to see her family…

…during those long days and nights, my grandpa pulled me aside. He’s from the blue collar scruff of lower class Hong Kong; coming here to work as a chef in America. Usually he’s laughing in an apish fashion, or clearing…

The last couple months, I’ve been feeling a little down. There are exciting seasons in planting an area- and it’s true! Record amount of conversions! Our 3 campuses with bible studies who didn’t have anything 2 years ago!… but there are seasons where I wonder to myself- what am I doing? (What’s funny is this always seems to happen dec-Jan for me, looking back haha. I am a creature of habit)…

Picture credit: Jenny Klouse

On one side, pressure to become something I am not.

On the other, labels that assume I am something I am not.

Bring me back to that safe place, In Your love Where my uniqueness was formed Where it is now established Where it yearns to go

Help me be.

…some random Christian thoughts on #metoo as a male leader that have been clamoring around in my head lately… I have heard many (usually men, especially Christians) say the #metoo movement is too harsh on men and doesn’t give enough grace. Yes, the online reactions are harsh, the immediate shaming is jarring… Of course this is a time where us men feel a little scared these days, and are wondering…