sometimes going to school is worth it.
❛ okey, you press that button & i’m just going to stand way over here. ❜
❛ i could go slower, but i don’t want to. ❜
❛ i’m glad you’re entertained. that’s very important to me. now shut up. ❜
❛ you have six seconds to answer & tell them to shut their phone. ❜
❛ oh, that’s nice. i’ve always wanted an iphone. could’ve at least fixed the screen, though. ❜
❛ hang on, i think my pizza rolls are on fire. ❜
❛ OUT, GET OUT, THE MICROWAVE CAUGHT ON FIRE! ❜
❛ who wants to jump out of the window for me? it’s for an experiment. ❜
❛ what did you draw for me? ❜
❛ i thought people drew dicks on tables only in fifth grade. ❜
❛ DON’T AIM FOR URANUS. ❜
❛ can you hold my gun for a second? ❜
❛ it was not my intention to shoot you. ❜
❛ you laughed, i didn’t, did you notice that? ❜
❛ the angle doesn’t matter, does it? ❜
❛ oh, yes, because heaven forbid people start kissing. ❜
❛ as everyone knows, kissing leads to sex. ❜
❛ oh no! a boob! whatever are we going to do!? ❜
❛ how do you accidentally fall out of a plane? ❜
❛ congratulations, you just killed everyone. ❜
❛ THIS IS NOT A DRILL. it’s a screwdriver. ❜
❛ don’t be rude. share your gummy bears. ❜
❛ you can’t substitute water with spit. that’s just gross. ❜
❛ you can totally make a bowling ball out of feathers. ❜
❛ bless your ass out of here. ❜
❛ don’t give me any of that cheap stuff. ❜
❛ jesus can’t help you now. ❜
❛ i refuse to believe you’re that stupid. ❜
❛ i am done with your sarcastic attitude. ❜
❛ the only excuse for not coming is dying. ❜
❛ the only size that matters is the size of the statue. ❜
❛ i don’t get payed enough to deal with this. ❜
❛ don’t cry, you’re an ugly crier. ❜
baratheonpilled
ellievsbear
titsay
stormborns
