Da Lizzurd

unclench your teeth

I need this texted to me every 15 minutes

my anxiety has a loophole that if somebody is else is equally or more uncomfortable I develop the sudden ability to Do The Thing

i cant go and ask for more ketchup for myself but if my friend wants more ketchup im out of my seat in a second

The mom friend override

I don’t wanna get involved in the drama I just wanna know 103% of the information on what happened

Subtly Tries To Regulate Breathing Rate So No One Knows I Got Winded Walking Up The Stairs: a novel by me

I’d like to cancel my subscription to Menstrual Cycle Monthly

I’m sorry, it appears you’ve taken out a fifty-sixty year subscription. However, we can pause it for nine months as long as you sign a contract that says you’ll take out a subscription to Baby Daily for at least eighteen years

Damn those Terms and Conditions.

i didn’t even read them i’ve made a terrible mistake