welcome to my blog page of random stuff

they dont stop asking me for things. mordred has devolved into a 90s beach californian accent. its like hes slowly morphing into a ninja turtle in vernacular. “cowabunga, dude! im stoked for these waves!” im crying. artoria doesnt care. she’s too busy thinking about her next meal.

kiyohime says she’s made us children like she’s always wanted us to have. she’s made 157 tiny sandcastles with twigs for arms and small conches for eyes. “you’re a twelve year old kiyohime. also, you literally want me to eat your flesh.” “think of the children”, she responds. i am. its why i dont humor her. scathach is blissfully unaware, microwaving a burrito with her runes. they do everything, and yet im scared to ask her to use them to go home. they do basically everything here, but she’s smart. if they were capable to, im sure they would have taken us home. right?

marie antoinette has created the equivalent of the ascpa on this island, and urges us to go vegan. somehow, she has befriended every animal in this place. if i were racist, i would call her pocahontas reincarnate. im not, so i settle for jane goodall. anne and mary play ping pong on our makeshift ping pong table. arturia bites into another raw coconut. “the crunch is amazing!”, she says. please, god, take me now.

the crabs on this island, seeing our growing society of sorts, have begun imitating us in kind. they are forming some sort of crab society, which i have lovingly dubbed The Conch Republic. somehow, they have elected karna as their leader. when i questioned him about it, all he could say was, “I’m so sorry for what is seemingly a defection, Master. But, I genuinely believe with all my heart that with some guidance, these beautiful, confused entities could grow into a bustling, amazing, caring species.” the crabs cheered him on with loud claw clacks.

i wont lie. if i was a crab, i’d vote for him too.

mash has been my anchor. since we’re low on iron, she used her shield as a makeshift cooking skillet. i think it’s getting to her too, though. when it started raining, she lifted her shield, declaring, “time to turn this frying pan… into a drying pan!” tamamo joined us under the shield hiding beneath our legs. she says arturia’s snapped and started hunting her. saying something about “how she used to hunt boxes in the good old days…”