The Daily Gerbil: Warm-Ups for Writers

Write a poem that wonders how your favorite band (or celebrity) is doing today (4/16/20).  Every line should ask a question.

Ask a friend what they’re worried about, and then write a poem about that worry from your friend’s point of view.

Write a haiku about coronavirus.

Spend at least five minutes writing a letter to yourself, being gentle with and proud of yourself for living through quarantine these past few weeks.

Spend five minutes writing about how your parents met.  Then brainstorm: how did the parents of your main character meet?  Aim to know this story as well as you know the one of your own parents.

Max: "For the love of God please stop barking Daisy!"

“Just the tape.”

Patricia loved her dachshunds. She looked forward to spending time with them, there were all she needed. Ray loved Patricia. It was really very simple, and also unfortunate. Every now and then, when she walked by, he would ask if she wanted to have dinner. "You know, as neighbors do!" Every time she would politely decline. She "Had things to tend to at home, and the puppies need attention". He thought today would be different, since no one could go to work, and maybe she would be lonely too. Today was not different. Actually it was, since it hurt more than usual. Ray hated her dachshunds. 

My flight was leaving in 2 hours, which meant I really should be on my way to the airport already. Cardboard boxes of the things I couldn't fit in my (overpriced) beat up red suitcase littered the floor, sat on top of my bare blue mattress. It was the mattress I was supposed to fuck him on, when he got back from break. Which clearly isn't happening, because I'm going home, and he's already home, fucking Connecticut, which I didn't think had beaches but apparently does. It also has his ex girlfriend, a senior in highschool now. Actually, she might not be his ex. I forget the details. Either way, she didn't know about me and I only knew about her in theory, which made everything okay, but it looks like going home is going to keep me morally upstanding.

However, I am an adult. So instead of drafting a melodramatic Tumblr post and selfishly indulging in my angst, I will simply disregard my internal doubt and have an open and honest conversation with my wife should these feelings begin to infringe on our relationship. Because, more than anything, I love my wife. I love her more than any broody Spotify playlist or pathetic pity-party crying session. And I won’t ruin our relationship because of some self-imposed love triangle.

As I walked down Arbre Way, I readjusted my hat and pulled on Milly’s lead to stop her from walking. I noticed a man having a picnic, and he seemed to be talking to…nobody. Milly and I walked closer. I soon realized that it was Joe, the mailman! I released Milly from her lead to let her run free. I ran beside her, attempting to entrance my soulmate, Joe. He stopped talking abruptly when I arrived at the corner of his blanket, but he also seemed pleased to see me.  “Heloisa! Take a seat on my blanket; I was just talking to my late wife, Hermina,” “Oh, I don’t mean to interrupt you, but may I ask, is..is..she d..dead?” “Oh yes, but we are still madly in love, and we always speak to each other on Thursdays. Don’t worry, my lovely Heloisa. I love you too!”

The bench was cold beneath my legs. It’s better than sitting on the couch with Ben, though; that much I know. I can’t take lying to him anymore. It’s eating away at me; every minute of every day. I want to tell him, but I know it would be the end of us. I never planned on being in love with two people at once- who does? I’ve been with Ben since high school. He’s all I’ve ever known. He’s been with me through everything, through my dad dying, my sister relapsing, the loss of our first pregnancy, everything. That’s the thing though, when you’ve been with someone through, what feels like war, it’s almost like the relationship has combusted from the inside out, slowly without each of you even realizing it. When I think of Cameron I think of a new start, a new world- I think of hope.

Maybe I’ll let the sun undress me and stop waiting for your return.

You take three bisexuals and you put them in a park. Sounds like the beginning of a terrible joke. This was a terrible joke. We sat on a hand woven blanket. We’d all post a picture later with a caption like “just vibing”. Just vibing? More like “just cheating”. I know Johnny and Taylor are hooking up. I really don’t think the new “Woody” nickname is just because of his cartoon, oblong, Toy Story head. That’s my girlfriend cowboy, back the fuck off. God, the longer I look at him the uglier he gets. Wait. Maybe. Maybe I could stand his face long enough to give Taylor a taste of what she’s been serving me. And babe let me tell you, it doesn’t taste like that brie you’re stuffing in your mouth right now. Three bisexuals sitting in a park. Just vibing.

"At least you're loyal."

I tried everything not to. I never wore jeans. I never wore makeup. I never straightened my hair. I always talked back. I loved movies and you loved books. You knew everything about politics and I couldn’t tell you what happened in the primaries. I couldn’t handle a pinch of black pepper in my food without chugging a gallon of water and you had a packet of crushed red pepper with you at every meal. I never wanted to talk about my family but you always asked me questions about them. I tried to distance myself but you wouldn’t let me. I fell in love with you and in an Oedipus sort of way you fell in love with me too. But she was in love with you first. 

The streets were lonely and expansive. Apart from the occasional car whisking by, I was completely alone. And I felt completely alone. I thought back to before the virus. It seemed like ages ago since I’d seen her. Celeste was cooped up with John in a studio apartment. Why wasn’t she answering my calls? John is a good guy but he’s been in love with her since freshman year. My mind was racing … why did I yell at her? She wasn’t even flirting she was just being friendly. Why was I always so insecure? If I hadn’t driven her away…