literally none of this would be an issue if i had a hurdy-gurdy. if i had a hurdy-gurdy i would just be playing the hurdy-gurdy

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literally none of this would be an issue if i had a hurdy-gurdy. if i had a hurdy-gurdy i would just be playing the hurdy-gurdy

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why is everyone so mean. how aren’t you tired
the way these leggings have improved my like. general well-being feels unreal
reallyyyy really dislike not being the owner of my time
it’s always some task or another. and it’s always gotta be in the hours that my medication is in effect. if i’m lucky i can readjust to #myActivity quickly but then often it takes me a bit. which shaves off the time i can be active (because of the medications short lasting effect). and then there’s also the Symptoms. i just wanna do my activity when i can in peace
reallyyyy really dislike not being the owner of my time

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CUMPLAÑITOOOOO 🥳🎉🎂 happy borthday cono love u lots espero que la pases fantástico 💕❤️💕❤️ hugging u
mochas grasias Dagan querido ♥ te quiero y te aprecio muchio muchio
still thinking about the quark arms dealer episode
hate this thing where if you’re not diagnosed you’re not like. allowed to be scared about Bodily Sensations and Experiences but also if you don’t show a minimum of what a doctor can interpret as some concern it’s like Why are you even here. it’s a really difficult line to tread
lately my insides (and outsides?) have been hurting in… new and exciting ways. thankfully it’s not too frequent* nor super intense but boy. yeowch+yikes
more people need to give themselves permission to write and draw pornography
it is virtuous and necessary that you write, draw, and distribute pornography
can we start with not conflating "erotic/sexual art or writing" with pornography
no lmao

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You actually cannot skip to being good at a creative endeavour that you haven't put much practice into. You cannot trick your way out of the 'knows that your work is not what you want it to be but don't know how to improve it' stage by planning or reading or talking about it really really hard. At some point you just have to craft through it until your brain finds it's own unique way back to the 'everything I make slaps' stage and be prepared to start the cycle all over again. You just have to make that project you're excited about slightly less good than you want it to be. (Says this standing in a pool of blood and covered in blood and also coughing up a little blood)
everyone stop reblogging this I hate to be reminded of my own good advice
I fuck with this
[image description: screenshot of writing formatted as a question and answer exchange. headline of piece is: The Proposal to Raise Every Boy as a Girl. (author not listed)
Q. You want to raise every boy as a girl? Yes.
Q. Why? A boy will learn to hate girls as long as he is raised in such a way where he is treated as better, and superior to, his girl peers, whenever he is cruel to girls. So, instead, we raise boys as girls.
Q. What if they say they are not a girl, and want to be acknowledged as boy? Then you know they are a boy, so you must make sure to understand them as boy, and not a girl.
Q. What does it mean to be 'raised as a girl'? That's up for you to decide. The only difference is that you should not raise boys any differently than you raise girls, since you raise every boy as a girl.
Q. Girls and boys are raised in specific ways for specific purposes, so it does not make sense to raise boys as girls. If you raise every boy as a girl, then there is no being which is not raised as a girl, so anyone raised as a girl necessarily must learn to do anything and everything to grow up, without restrictions on tasks, labours, or interests.
Q. But boys and girls are different. All two girls are different, and raising girls in one specific way destroys this individuality in favour of moulding girls to serve the same master. Still, the girls resist to live life on their own terms. If girls can be raised such that they know they can do anything they want, including not being girls, so too will boys raised as girls.
Q. Why not raise every girl as a boy? Because if a girl does not exist among boys, then the girl is made.
Q. Why not raise girls and boys as themselves? The self must be made in a world where girls and boys can first and foremost be themselves. One step towards this goal is to raise every boy as a girl.
Q. The way people raise girls is cruel, so why would you raise boys with that cruelty? If you raise girls with cruelty, then you should stop being cruel to girls.
/end description]
like i can definitely keep surviving like this. i just can’t wait for the day i don’t have to micromanage my life for that survival as much, ya know
if i wasnt such a big coward i would be making some sort of crowdfunding thing so i can go back to psych and get proper medical care and maybe even not have to stress so much all the time about like, buying groceries and shit, or like needing to replace socks that are falling apart. alas im not in any immediate danger nor i will be so i don’t feel that’s deserved + there’s too many people who need that kind of help for like. actual emergencies that i would rather get that kindness instead. yk.
starting to kinda hate this medication. the one i was on before (the one that works well) worked all day so well and the comedown was so gradual and mellow that if i was already focused on something i could sort of stretch the effect through inertia until i was done, got too tired, or it was time for dinner (provided i wasnt being accosted by symptoms of whatever else i got going on too much, which would tend to make the med work just enough so that i could like. move around. but that’s true for both meds). this one works fine for the ~3 hours it’s supposed to work for and then it’s like a switch flips and like… depending on the day i just stop functioning or i can keep more or less focusing on whatever if i can engage The Inertia but i get just. so pissed at the task. cause i’m suddenly not focusing only on what i’m doing but also on everything that’s happening around which doesn’t really need to be much for it to be too much, yk? and it’s made even more too-much-y by the comedown itself. plus the fatigue i get between doses at noon gets so fucking bad it often makes my afternoon dose jsut not work very well and it’s uuugghh. sucks.

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Charlie Kirk is scheduled to speak at UVU. I have the opportunity to do the funniest thing of all time
IT WASN'T ME I PROMISE