literally none of this would be an issue if i had a hurdy-gurdy. if i had a hurdy-gurdy i would just be playing the hurdy-gurdy
styofa doing anything
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@dagasinfilo
literally none of this would be an issue if i had a hurdy-gurdy. if i had a hurdy-gurdy i would just be playing the hurdy-gurdy

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why is everyone so mean. how arenāt you tired
the way these leggings have improved my like. general well-being feels unreal
reallyyyy really dislike not being the owner of my time
itās always some task or another. and itās always gotta be in the hours that my medication is in effect. if iām lucky i can readjust to #myActivity quickly but then often it takes me a bit. which shaves off the time i can be active (because of the medications short lasting effect). and then thereās also the Symptoms. i just wanna do my activity when i can in peace
reallyyyy really dislike not being the owner of my time

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CUMPLAĆITOOOOO š„³šš happy borthday cono love u lots espero que la pases fantĆ”stico šā¤ļøšā¤ļø hugging u
mochas grasias Dagan querido ā„ te quiero y te aprecio muchio muchio
still thinking about the quark arms dealer episode
hate this thing where if youāre not diagnosed youāre not like. allowed to be scared about Bodily Sensations and Experiences but also if you donāt show a minimum of what a doctor can interpret as some concern itās like Why are you even here. itās a really difficult line to tread
lately my insides (and outsides?) have been hurting in⦠new and exciting ways. thankfully itās not too frequent* nor super intense but boy. yeowch+yikes
more people need to give themselves permission to write and draw pornography
it is virtuous and necessary that you write, draw, and distribute pornography
can we start with not conflating "erotic/sexual art or writing" with pornography
no lmao

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You actually cannot skip to being good at a creative endeavour that you haven't put much practice into. You cannot trick your way out of the 'knows that your work is not what you want it to be but don't know how to improve it' stage by planning or reading or talking about it really really hard. At some point you just have to craft through it until your brain finds it's own unique way back to the 'everything I make slaps' stage and be prepared to start the cycle all over again. You just have to make that project you're excited about slightly less good than you want it to be. (Says this standing in a pool of blood and covered in blood and also coughing up a little blood)
everyone stop reblogging this I hate to be reminded of my own good advice
I fuck with this
[image description: screenshot of writing formatted as a question and answer exchange. headline of piece is: The Proposal to Raise Every Boy as a Girl. (author not listed)
Q. You want to raise every boy as a girl? Yes.
Q. Why? A boy will learn to hate girls as long as he is raised in such a way where he is treated as better, and superior to, his girl peers, whenever he is cruel to girls. So, instead, we raise boys as girls.
Q. What if they say they are not a girl, and want to be acknowledged as boy? Then you know they are a boy, so you must make sure to understand them as boy, and not a girl.
Q. What does it mean to be 'raised as a girl'? That's up for you to decide. The only difference is that you should not raise boys any differently than you raise girls, since you raise every boy as a girl.
Q. Girls and boys are raised in specific ways for specific purposes, so it does not make sense to raise boys as girls. If you raise every boy as a girl, then there is no being which is not raised as a girl, so anyone raised as a girl necessarily must learn to do anything and everything to grow up, without restrictions on tasks, labours, or interests.
Q. But boys and girls are different. All two girls are different, and raising girls in one specific way destroys this individuality in favour of moulding girls to serve the same master. Still, the girls resist to live life on their own terms. If girls can be raised such that they know they can do anything they want, including not being girls, so too will boys raised as girls.
Q. Why not raise every girl as a boy? Because if a girl does not exist among boys, then the girl is made.
Q. Why not raise girls and boys as themselves? The self must be made in a world where girls and boys can first and foremost be themselves. One step towards this goal is to raise every boy as a girl.
Q. The way people raise girls is cruel, so why would you raise boys with that cruelty? If you raise girls with cruelty, then you should stop being cruel to girls.
/end description]
like i can definitely keep surviving like this. i just canāt wait for the day i donāt have to micromanage my life for that survival as much, ya know
if i wasnt such a big coward i would be making some sort of crowdfunding thing so i can go back to psych and get proper medical care and maybe even not have to stress so much all the time about like, buying groceries and shit, or like needing to replace socks that are falling apart. alas im not in any immediate danger nor i will be so i donāt feel thatās deserved + thereās too many people who need that kind of help for like. actual emergencies that i would rather get that kindness instead. yk.
starting to kinda hate this medication. the one i was on before (the one that works well) worked all day so well and the comedown was so gradual and mellow that if i was already focused on something i could sort of stretch the effect through inertia until i was done, got too tired, or it was time for dinner (provided i wasnt being accosted by symptoms of whatever else i got going on too much, which would tend to make the med work just enough so that i could like. move around. but thatās true for both meds). this one works fine for the ~3 hours itās supposed to work for and then itās like a switch flips and like⦠depending on the day i just stop functioning or i can keep more or less focusing on whatever if i can engage The Inertia but i get just. so pissed at the task. cause iām suddenly not focusing only on what iām doing but also on everything thatās happening around which doesnāt really need to be much for it to be too much, yk? and itās made even more too-much-y by the comedown itself. plus the fatigue i get between doses at noon gets so fucking bad it often makes my afternoon dose jsut not work very well and itās uuugghh. sucks.

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Charlie Kirk is scheduled to speak at UVU. I have the opportunity to do the funniest thing of all time
IT WASN'T ME I PROMISE