Where the FUNK are DAFT PUNK??

When a drunk girl outside a club bathroom speaks… you listen. If she tells you that you’ll find love despite being hurt in the past? She’s right. If she tells you to stop being so self-aware? She’s right. They are the modern day Oracles at Delphi and must be taken at their every word

outside after a lesbian concert (King Princess), i asked a girl dressed as jesus if she forgave me. a drunk girl ran up and slurred “i don’t mean to interrupt, but you don’t need to be forgiven. you don’t need to be forgiven.”

cunningly avoiding tooth decay by going to bed with a single square of chocolate on my tongue for the bacteria to snack on instead of my teeth

the zodiac is OUT the new personality test is which queer eye member you would immediately disappoint