Dream Daddy: A Dad Dating Simulator Sentence Starters
âBetrayed by my own butt yet again.â
âCan you explain memes to me?â
âContrary to popular belief, penguins are⊠birds.â
âDid you think I was gonna stab you just now?â
âDonât cry. Donât cry. I swear to god if you cry again.â
âDonât write checks your dick canât cash.â
âHereâs to bad decisions and relaxed moral values.â
âHowâs theâŠâŠ jeeeeeeeeeesus?â
âI am a happy little cheese monster.â
âI am spinning a web of lies that I fear will one day consume me.â
âI donât want your stupid fruit leather.â
âI have to get a solid two to three hours of brooding in per day. Filling quotas.â
âItâs called âstring cheeseâ and not âchompy cheeseâ for a reason.â
âIâll probably end up standing uncomfortably in the corner with a plate of food and hope that nobody talks to me.â
âIâm so many levels of irony deep Iâve forgotten what humour is.â
âIâm suddenly struck with the overwhelming need to crawl back into bed.â
âMothman is bullshit.â
âMy ultimate sexual fantasy is sleeping in on a Saturday.â
âOH SHIT THATâS A KNIFE.â
âSee you in class⊠bitch.â
âSharks are tight.â
âSo, you ever kill a man?â
âStop being so desperate to please your hot friend.â
âThat⊠that is a good butt.â
âThe key to being cool is acting like you donât care about anything but actually care very deeply about everything to the point where itâs debilitating.â
âThis ice cream cake is my new boyfriend.â
âThis is where I come to masturbate.â
âWait, Iâm a wreck.â
âWHAT HAVE YOU DONE.â
âYou can never be too careful. See that baby in that stroller over there? Government operative.â
âYour face⊠is⊠good.â
âYour unending thirst will be your ultimate downfall.â














